[Celena]

I'm asking these questions so that we can all share and help those who may not ask these questions, but are thinking or wondering about them

For all the ladies that currently temp/chart, use opk's, fertility monitors, added supplements and all of the like...

• Do you find that you are stressed at all, more so with doing all of these extra things while TTCAL than before when you may not have been?
  .
• Would you rather take the extra measures and do you feel more in control, structured doing this?
  .
• Does taking these extra steps while TTCAL take away from the joy of BD'ing for you?
  .
• Making it feel more like a job than pleasure of trying to make your LO?
  .
• Does DH take an active role with TTCAL, learning about your cycle, opk's etc...?
  .
• Has TTCAL been something that has brought you and your DH closer together since losing your LO (LO's)?
  .
• What are some things that you have changed during your journey that you wished you'd of done or known about when you first started ttcal?
  .
  .
  Thanks ladies for sharing in advance I hope this is helpful for some of our newest members, and even regulars!

[lex1078]

Do you find that you are stressed at all, more so with doing all of these extra things while TTCAL than before when you may not have been? Yes, it's so different after a loss. I get scared when I get a BFP cause now I just relate it to a loss.

Would you rather take the extra measures and do you feel more in control, structured doing this? Nope, I want to go back to the days of "no worries".

Does taking these extra steps while TTCAL take away from the joy of BD'ing for you? No so much. I don't let DH know when I'm O'ing so he doesn't feel any pressure. I try to not think about it so much then. More when I'm in the 2WW.

Making it feel more like a job than pleasure of trying to make your LO? No, we try to make it fun and do different things so the "pressure" isn't there.

Does DH take an active role with TTCAL, learning about your cycle, opk's etc...? He tries to know what is going on, but I don't let him know so much cause we both don't need to be under pressure.

Has TTCAL been something that has brought you and your DH closer together since losing your LO (LO's)? Yes, it's brought us much closer.

What are some things that you have changed during your journey that you wished you'd of done or known about when you first started ttcal? I wish we went to a Genetics Counselor after our first m/c and got testing done. Maybe that would have made this journey happier for us.

[luvmykids623]

• Do you find that you are stressed at all, more so with doing all of these extra things while TTCAL than before when you may not have been?

Using the CBE monitor doesn't stress me out. The fear of loss is what stresses me out.

• Would you rather take the extra measures and do you feel more in control, structured doing this?

I definitely feel more in control and structured using my monitor, and I would rather use it than have the added stress of not knowing what's going on with my body.

• Does taking these extra steps while TTCAL take away from the joy of BD'ing for you?

Taking the extra steps doesn't take the joy out of it for me. The fear of whether I'll get preggo and stay preggo is what sucks out the fun.

• Making it feel more like a job than pleasure of trying to make your LO?

I definitely think it's a pleasure trying to make my LO. That feeling is separate from BDing being more like a job.

• Does DH take an active role with TTCAL, learning about your cycle, opk's etc...?

DH likes to turn on the monitor and see how many bars there are, because it translates into how much BDing he's going to get.

• Has TTCAL been something that has brought you and your DH closer together since losing your LO (LO's)?

In the beginning the loss made me feel more distant, because I felt like my body had failed him, and then he was grieving differently than I was. But, once we sat and talked about how we were feeling and I realized that he was just as devastated as I was and didn't blame me one bit, TTCAL has brought us closer together. We're in this fight together!

• What are some things that you have changed during your journey that you wished you'd of done or known about when you first started ttcal?

I haven't really changed anything, since I've used the monitor since the very beginning. But I have learned that this is an incredibly difficult road to have to go down. I wouldn't wish this on my worst enemy.