[~LaurenNoel~]

I just can't get over the idea that I will lose this baby. I just hang out on this board (besides wanting to give support) because I expect something to go wrong with the pregnancy. I am sick as a dog still, 12 weeks tomorrow, and I just saw baby perfectly healthy on u/s (pic on ticker). It makes me really sad because this is our last pregnancy, as I am having my tubes tied due to medical conditions, and I can't even enjoy the pregnancy.

I just can't move on, and I hope you ladies don't mind me staying around for a while.

[tobi4]

Of course we dont mind you sticking around, you are an important part of why TTCAL is such a wonderful place to be. I know you are scared, all the ttcal grads are, right? And even us undergrads are scared. Youve made it to 12 weeks hun! Thats awesome! Almost 2nd trimester. Id love to be able to say something that would make your fears disappear, but I know that after my first loss when I concieved again, I didnt stop being afraid until I held my precious little one in my arms. What you are feeling is totally normal hun. I do hope things get easier as time goes on for you. Hugs

[dreamer10]

Those are very real fears that we can all relate to. I too like to lurk here and still post, since I have called this board home for a long time. Try to hang in there and enjoy your pregnancy...as hard as it is! That ultrasound pic is a beautiful one...they got an amazing shot of your little bean. I thought it was fake at first it was so good....

[Brittanie]

I don't think that fear ever really goes away. That's part of what you had stolen from you. Your baby, your dreams, your future, and the ability to just expect a pregnancy to go well.

((hugs))

[Pitridge]

I agree with Brittanie, the fear doesn't go away, it just gets easier as the pg progresses.

I know it's hard but always think positive, try to enjoy the pg

[MamaRN]

((HUGS)) Lauren. I was petrified pretty much my entire pregnancy with Nora that I would lose her, I counted every milestone, looked up survival rates based on weeks gestation once we got past 22 weeks, and then with my second pregnancy I felt more secure and relaxed and then I had a loss..... I can't imagine how I will feel if and when I get pregnant again.

Stay around as long as you need to! You are always welcome here.

[~LaurenNoel~]

Originally Posted by dreamer10

Those are very real fears that we can all relate to. I too like to lurk here and still post, since I have called this board home for a long time. Try to hang in there and enjoy your pregnancy...as hard as it is! That ultrasound pic is a beautiful one...they got an amazing shot of your little bean. I thought it was fake at first it was so good....

It's funny you said that because it was done in the ER (long story) and the tech was nice enough to give us 2 pics. The baby was waving in this one.

Originally Posted by MamaRN

((HUGS)) Lauren. I was petrified pretty much my entire pregnancy with Nora that I would lose her, I counted every milestone, looked up survival rates based on weeks gestation once we got past 22 weeks, and then with my second pregnancy I felt more secure and relaxed and then I had a loss..... I can't imagine how I will feel if and when I get pregnant again.

Stay around as long as you need to! You are always welcome here.

I was much more relaxed with the one I lost at 10 weeks too. I had a chemical in Jan, but it did not hurt like the one in April did. It just broke my heart.

Thanks ladies for the support! I knew you all would understand.

[ldovey83]

HUGS hun... I started off that way when I found out I was pregnant and I started praying about it.. God pointed out to me that fear is not from God.. The only thing we should fear is God himself.. So when I thought about it.. I put this baby in HIS hands and this pregnancy in HIS hands and I left it there... I am trusting God... I no longer fear loosing this one.. Can't say it hasnt gone through my head, but anytime I start to doubt I pray and give it to God.. HUGS hun.. Hang in there..

[markswife]

I hang around for the same reasons. It did get a little bit better the further along I got but even at almost 18 weeks tomorrow, I still worry. Like Brittanie said, the ability to completely relax was stolen from each of us. To each of us, losing a baby is a cold, hard reality rather than something that might happen.

[Kary♥RN]

HUGS... While the fear will be with you... that is where the PAL board comes in.. Those ladies are pregnant after loss.. or have went on to have thier rainbow babies. You can post all your fears, and questions... Because we have been were you are.. I am 29 wks.. and I feel my babies move everyday.. and I am still scared to death I will loose them. The ladies of PAL have been my strength!! They understand what fears, anxitey, and craziness you will be going through!!! While please stay here and support you TTCAL ladies, that are still trying to concieve.. PAL is where you will get the support to get through your pregnancy!!! HUGS