[shen7]

I just got my beta from this morning's draw back. 5,573, up from 1,894 on Friday (3 days ago). That's almost exactly a 48 hr doubling time. Is that a bit on the fast side at these beta levels??? Not sure. My OB thinks they are good numbers. I am still having some very light occasional spotting since my pelvic and tv u/s Friday. I also occasionally get some brief cramps, like AF is coming but not here yet. I've had some nausea and icky tummy feeling and heartburn that comes and goes, no actual vomiting but I felt close once or twice. I am 5 wks 1 day today according to my O date (based on OPKs).

My next u/s is scheduled for Thursday morning. My OB said that normally he'd wait longer, but with my history, he wants to stay on the safe side as far as avoiding another ectopic rupture. It feels very high stakes... either they will find it in the womb... or they won't, and I will have a REPEAT ectopic (i.e. future chances of avoiding ectopic go to 50% - IF they can save my one remaining tube, and if they can't I'll be functionally infertile).

I am really trying not to be so scared, and sometimes I do okay, but when the fear hits me, it hits me hard. My only comfort is that I will know one way or another whether it's ectopic after the u/s Thursday... just have to get through a couple more days.....

[HopefulMommy81]

Hope everything goes well Thursday and they see your little bean in the right place!

[LisaG825]

I hope they find you little bean in the right place this time! Lots of luck to you! You will be in my thoughts and prayers.

[luvmykids623]

I hope everything goes perfectly on Thursday!!

[Celena]

Shen they sound like normal doubling time, another draw or two would be good... you can't put everything into just 2 draws. Hang tight and enjoy each day as much as you can. Try not to over analyze your symptoms, you're so early and at that point they come n go anyway.

Chin up buttercup!

[SkyBaby]

Praying for you sweetie!!! Hope they find that precious bean in the right spot.

[stargatemommy]

Good luck! I had spotting from 5 weeks until 10 weeks, and baby is fine. I hope you have great numbers!

[Halfbaked]

I hope the ultrasound goes well. Sending lots of positive in the womb vibes your way.

[shen7]

Thank you so much ladies... I'm very grateful for your well-wishes... I certainly do hope it will be fine... womby, sticky baby dust to all!!!!

[okiliz]

I really hope all goes well for you on Thursday and will check back here to see an update !!! Each time one of us has success I feel like it gives the rest of us hope !! Hugs, thoughts and prayers for you !!

[.:Shortcake:.]

Praying for you sweetheart!

[ohnicole]

I swear I posted in this thread yesterday, and now it is gone... mysterious. Maybe I dreamed that I posted here

Anyway, what I said was that your numbers sound awesome, Shen! Don't let that scientist mind of yours convince you otherwise

I can't wait to see pictures of your sticky bean in your uterus on Thursday!

[shen7]

Nicole, my DH was literally LAUGHING at me yesterday... I was comparing my numbers to some datasets of numbers for ectopics (at time of discovery or rupture), saying "well, I think my chances of an ectopic, given this doubling time and absolute beta #, have gone down by about a factor 5 relative to my prior probability..." and he was like, "what the hell are you doing?!?" I told him, "I'm sorry, this is how I've been trained to deal with uncertainty. Some people pray for the best, I find datasets and update my prior." I had some mild urges to make graphs too but I resisted.

Sorry everybody, that was REALLY nerdy.

[ohnicole]

Snap out of it, Shen!!!! Pregnancy is not that certain, and statistics will really mean nothing... even if you do make pretty graphs out of them You gotta be totally un-sciencey and have some faith in your little bean

[ldovey83]

Shen the numbers sound great.. I know it is hard not to worry given the past.. Trust me we all do it.. Try to enjoy it.. Everything is sounding good. I will pray the news is good after the ultrasound.. Just keep us posted..

[shen7]

Thanks guys... I've sort of exhausted my whole rational-analysis approach, now I'm just vaguely worried and feeling vulnerable... I know I need to relax and just hope for the best, but it's hard... I think I'm about at the point now where I ruptured last time, and still no ectopic symptoms, so I am clinging to that...

This morning I was having flashbacks to that morning of the rupture, the pain that woke me up at 5 am, almost passing out at the morning burial and not able to stand up for the hymns at the church service due to the searing pains, being so embarrassed that I was sick at the funeral and couldn't be there for the family, wondering what I ate and why no one else was sick, the nurse cousin assessing my symptoms later that night and telling me it looked like a panic attack on top of food poisoning, not related to the pregnancy and definitely don't go to the ER... being in *incredible* pain and not being able to take ibuprofen for fear of hurting the embryo... any mild cramps I am having now, are not even CLOSE to that. So I am hopeful but also the memories are making feel sort of sad and helpless before the cruelties of fate...

Anyway... less than 24 hours to go until I know for sure!!!!!

[mommy jenn]

everything sound great! i wish you all the best and sticky vibes to you!!!

[Pitridge]

Originally Posted by ohnicole

Snap out of it, Shen!!!! Pregnancy is not that certain, and statistics will really mean nothing... even if you do make pretty graphs out of them You gotta be totally un-sciencey and have some faith in your little bean

Totally agree!

praying for you