[Joanna1127]

I can't help get over this extreme sadness that I have. Its only been 5 days since I learned of my loss, but its just not getting any better. I imagine this is going to take me months and months to begin feeling better. Plus I have so many people around me expecting. I am very happy for them but it sure doesn't make me feel any better. My emotions are like a light switch. I can go from being ok to completely breaking down in 2 seconds literally. I don't like this feeling at all. I feel very alone.

[Pitridge]

You are not alone, we are all here for you, so please don't think you are alone. We are here anytime you need us.

[Joanna1127]

Originally Posted by Pitridge

You are not alone, we are all here for you, so please don't think you are alone. We are here anytime you need us.

Thanks, I appreciate that a lot.

[avasmom603]

I am so sorry you are feeling so horrible I wish there was a way to wash the pain away.

For me, I am ok then I get almost a raging anger. I hate it. I am hoping it's hormones trying to regulate.

[little.lili]

I'm not sure when it will get better... Some days are better than others...

I feel like I'm a light switch as well... I push my "bad thoughts" away for as long as I can, but they always catch up to me

[TTCin2010]

Its a rollercoaster ride. Be kind to yourself its only been five days. Cry, scream or eat some ice cream, whatever makes you feel better. Take care

[~InHisHands~]

The thing that really helped me the most after my loss is a study... Threads of Hope, Pieces of Joy. I hope you consider doing it & that it helps you as much as it helped me.

[tobi4]

Dont be hard on yourself. It will get better. We all know what you are going through, we know how helpless and out of control you feel. You have to just go through it. What you have lost is much larger than people really understand. You've lost the dreams that you started making as soon as you concieved. Its so hard. Just know there are so many of us here, who know your hurt and will help. Not one of us would want you to suffer this alone. You are not alone here. ~hugs~

[MeganMomof5]

(((Hugs))) sorry to hear about your loss

[Servilia]

You're definitely not alone - we're all here for you and have been through it also so you can vent and cry to us
Just do whatever you need to to grieve..

[.:Shortcake:.]

HUGS! I am so sorry for your loss. With each of my losses I have grieved differently. With this one I haven't at all. But I think we all need to remember that we are allowed to grieve and we should grieve. We lost our baby/ies and no matter how far along we were we bonded with that baby. Please feel free to PM me any time you need to talk, are feeling alone, or have any questions. We are all here for you and we do know what your going through.

[Celena]

Joanna I'm sorry honey!

You know the light switch analogy is so perfect! It's like that from the day you start suspecting something isn't right to days, weeks, months later depending on how well or not well you deal with the grief. I still feel that way and my 3rd loss was in this past Feb'10. There's going to be good moments, good days as well as the bad ones... it's not an easy road travelled, but you can't beat yourself up over your feelings. There's allot of emotions that go along with a loss then ttc again.

[Joanna1127]

thanks everyone! I'm already so greatful to have this board.

[missy123]

I am so sorry for your loss... and yes you will feel this way for a while and it is normal. The day we see that BFP we fall in love with our babies. Loss hurts. It makes your soul scream and you just don't know what to to with the pain. You just want your baby back.

It took me a very long time to emotionally get to the point where I could feel true happiness again. And even though it has been 1 1/2 years there is an ache, a void in my heart where my baby is forever. There are moments I cry hard for my most recent loss as well.

We are here for you. Vent away, post 10 times a day if you want to. We understand, we have all been where you are. It is so hard to get through and right now you won't believe me but I promise with time it will get easier. You will never be the same, but you will find happiness in life again.

((Hugs))

[ashj_1218]

All these ladies have said it so well...but I will say it again. You lost something BIG. That baby was so much more than anyone will ever know (except others who have lost babies as well). It was your hopes, dreams, fears, and excitement. It was a piece of your heart, one of your soul, and something you will never know how to live without now. It is completely normal to grieve (and some grieve hard, some feel like they aren't doing it enough...it is all normal). It is okay to want to scream and vent and cry. Don't expect so much from yourself. The five stages of grieve are present here as well: denial, bargaining, anger, sadness, and acceptance. You will likely cycle through them several times (even daily) before coming to a new normal. Give yourself time...it can take a while to feel "okay" again. We all heal differently, but we all know how this feels and are here to support you. *BIG, BIG HUGS*

[sarha81]

it gets better. Thursday marks the 1 month for me. I healed a little but each new pregnancy announcement set me way back. You can hide pregnant friends on FB, if that's an issue. take small steps forward and don't be afraid to cry.

[Joanna1127]

Thanks again ladies.