[Halfbaked]

If you found out today that you were pg, how long would you wait until you told anyone? Who would you tell and who not?


My DH would know right away of course. I would probably let my sister know since she is the only one that knows about my mc and she is super supportive. I wouldn't be telling anyone else though. It's sad but my last 2 pregnancies, telling people was like delivering bad news. I'm glad I have you ladies to be excited for when the big event happens.

[avasmom603]

Last time I told no one and it was a very lonely place for me to be in. I don't want to do it like that again. This time I would tell my DH (obviously lol), my family and one of my closest friends. I would like to have people to lean on in case something happens.

[ohnicole]

Of course, DH will know right away. I will probably also tell one of my friends right away just to have someone to talk to about it.

Last time we told our friends and family after we saw the heartbeat at 7 weeks. I think I'm leaning towards that again. It will be hard to wait too long because I will be giving myself daily injections, and since my sister will be living with us half of each week, any symptoms I have might change our daily routine. Once she figures it out, she will tell everyone

As much as I hated telling everyone about our loss, I think I would have to tell them about another loss even if we didn't announce the pregnancy, so why waste the excitement?

[BeccaM]

Last time we told everyone... This time I will wait at least until we have a good appt with hearing the heartbeat or I may even wait until 2nd trimester. DH will know of course and I will also let my office manager at work know just in case... Im hoping its this cycle and it can be a nice Xmas present!

[Joanna1127]

good question!

one side of me doesn't want to tell anyone, besides my fiance. I am almost afraid to even go to the doctors so soon cause of all the stress I went through with watching my levels rise, etc. I feel like I"m going to be that much more stressed than I was with my loss. I guess time will tell...

[MeganMomof5]

I'm honestly not sure....I think i'd like to wait a little bit, but at the same time if I have another loss i'd like the support of everyone....My feelings are, if I have a loss, it wasn't because I told everyone (My DH thinks I jinx things)...If i'm going to have one, I will if I tell people or if I don't.

[okiliz]

I think I would wait for a little bit... We told his sisters as soon as our BFP came up and all of our family.. the neighbors we are close with... my levels were rising... then we got a healthy heartbeat..... and Found out it was twins but we had lost one at 9 weeks and on at over 10 weeks.. So I am not sure waiting till the heart beat visit would be good enough for me.... I think at 13 weeks we will tell everyone.. but then on the other side I think I should rejoice in my next pregnancy and celebrate it and being tons of positive thinking and just tell everyone.. However.. it is a thing of mixed feelings.. I knew from the staart something was not right and sometimes I worry that my negative feelings werw borrowing trouble..

[Brittanie]

Originally Posted by ohnicole

As much as I hated telling everyone about our loss, I think I would have to tell them about another loss even if we didn't announce the pregnancy, so why waste the excitement?

This is exactly how I feel. I've thought about this a lot. I haven't told anyone irl about our ttc date. When I do become pregnant, I want to tell everyone immediately. I get sick so early, that I need support in that and everyone knows anyway. We waited until we saw Erin's heartbeat and that was SO hard for me. With Patrick, it was good to know that I had all my family and friends excited and praying for us.

[ashj_1218]

Close family and friends, prolly after we saw the heartbeat. I would want the support even if something happened after that. But I wouldn't tell anyone before that. I didn't even tell my DH with our last chemical. I was waiting until the HCG was showing good signs. Obviously that didnt' happen, so I just told him about the chemical when I had to go to the doc for bloodwork. I don't feel like I jinx it by telling people...but I do have a weird thing that if I am excited I will jinx it. That is a horrible feeling. I prolly would wait until well into the second trimester to tell "outside" people. I don't see the point when it comes to people who are not 'important.' I can wait for those folks. But I will need my family's support, no matter what.

[~InHisHands~]

I would tell most everyone. I might not tell complete strangers in Wal-Mart but all my family, friends, & church family would know so that I can ask for prayers. I want to celebrate the new life no matter how long I get to keep him/her. Plus in my case, I think it will be a miracle that i would just have to shout to the world that I'm pg!!!

[Celena]

Originally Posted by Halfbaked

If you found out today that you were pg, how long would you wait until you told anyone? Who would you tell and who not?

Hmmm.... Of course my hubby FIRST he'd want to be the first to know for obvious reasons as would I. He would be very apprehensive about being excited because of our losses, but more excited than I'd be able to be which would be helpful to keep my head up and optimistic

Maybe my mother, she's never been supportive of me ever being pg... However I think after my last little one lost in February and then when they came to visit we had really long talks about it. Think she finally understood in her own way how painful it is and also she realizes how much we want our own baby together. I'd like to be able to tell her

As well a my BFF, she's always been the second or third to know.... She's supportive no matter what even tho she's never dealt with it she's dealt with a huge loss in her life of her fiancee. Which isn't the same we know but we can relate in some way of loss. She had helped during those times as well.

Obviously I'd come here and share altho I would be a little apprehensive... Because I know what it's like to be ttcal after many losses and for so long. it's sometimes hard to see bfp's as much as you're excited and happy for those who've struggled with loss, ttcal it's not an easy pill to swallow when you wonder when it's going to be your turn to conceive your rainbow baby. At the same time y'all have been my supportive like sisters so I'd want to share it with you he most!!

I could write a novel here

[ldovey83]

Well I have approached both directions, and by far I enjoyed telling everyone right away regardless the outcome.. I found that I enjoyed having everyone celebrate the created life, and I loved having the support behind me.. This last loss I didn't tell anyone, but you ladies and DH, and when I did loss I had to go back and tell people why I was sad about bleeding and why I had to go to the ER.. So in my case Im just going to shout it from the mountain tops.. LOL

[SkyBaby]

DH first and foremost. Before we see the heartbeat, I'd tell my parents, my grandma, and maybe DH's parents. My in-laws are wonderful people, but didn't seem to understand my heartbreak with my loss and how hard it is/was for me to hear of pregnancies in the family. They are very supportive though.

After we see the heartbeat, I'd tell everyone pretty much. lol I wouldn't be able to keep it in any longer lol.

[.:Stace:.]

Hmmmm that is a tough question!
Obviously my hubby .... after that ..... I would tell my boss .... but only because I may require time off and I won't be such a super RN like I normally am!
I also have 2 very close friends who were there for me when Patrick was born sleeping and when I had my m/c after him. I would need them more then anything!!
After that the rest of the world can wait until my gut is huge!!!

[Toots216]

Funny thing, I was thinking about this over the weekend! I would not tell DH until AF was late, I would probably tell my parents at about 8 weeks (NOT my in-laws - my MIL got WAY too upset with our m/c), and everybody else at 4 months. I really don't think I'd have a lot of confidence until I got to 15 or 16 weeks along and had all of my genetic testing done. It would be hard to keep it a secret for that long, but I really learned my lesson the hard way. People are STILL congratulating me, and then I have to tell them the bad news. It breaks my heart.

[luvmykids623]

I'm honestly not sure. The very first time we told everyone and it hurt so much to have to explain to everyone after I lost the baby. The second time I was on summer vacation, so not many people knew I was pregnant or when I lost the baby. This time around we only told a few very close, supportive friends, not even our family. It's been hard telling them about the loss, especially at work, but the one thing that makes it different from the first time is I don't have random people who haven't heard about the loss coming up and asking me how the baby's doing. Just for that I will probably do it the same way until we get to a good place next time.