I wanted to crawl into a dark hole yesterday..

ldovey83 · #1 October 11th, 2010, 03:49 PM

We had a friend come over that we hadn't seen since Aug.. Well I guess DH had told him we were expecting or what not cause he asked me " So Lindsey you look great h ow far along are you now?" I just stared at him.. Taken back.. I didn't even know what to say.. I just shook my head and fought back tears.. He said "What's wrong you're not?" I said no we lost the baby.. I know I have gained some weight but **** didnt think it was that bad until I am getting comments about it.. That was 2 comments in 2 days.. A little much.. Had me depressed all day yesterday..

MeganMomof5 · #2 October 11th, 2010, 03:51 PM

(((Hugs))) I'm sorry

I think days like that are normal...I'm sure it has nothing to do with your weight...Plus I think men just don't think.

Brittanie · #3 October 11th, 2010, 03:53 PM

I'm sorry honey!! I'm with Megan, I don't think it had to do with your weight. If people think you're pregnant than they're going to see it and that's that.

I hated comments from people who didn't know.

ldovey83 · #4 October 11th, 2010, 04:00 PM

Even my DH has made a comment about how my weight gain makes me look like I am 5 months pregnant.. It is bad.. I notice it but it is so hard to have the motivation to loose it when you are so depressed and just angry at life right now.

MeganMomof5 · #5 October 11th, 2010, 04:07 PM

awww he shouldn't of said that to you

(((hugs))) again...I wish there was something more I could do to help

.:Shortcake:. · #6 October 11th, 2010, 04:14 PM

HUGS! I'm sure it wasn't about your weight and alot of times men don't think they just speak and then later realize what they said!

ohnicole · #7 October 11th, 2010, 04:15 PM

Hugs, Lindsey! Sometimes people just say stupid things. I'm so sorry.

Halfbaked · #8 October 11th, 2010, 04:23 PM

My DH is forbidden to ever say anything to anyone about being pg. He asked some lady in Wal-mart how far along she was and she didn't even look pg. He said she was wearing maternity clothes so he thought she was. WHAT?? He then went on and on about having more kids to my SIL, not knowing she had a MC a few months before and was trying. When I told him, he felt really stupid. Some times, guys just don't think. I doubt it was your weight. If weight made everyone ask when you were due, I'd have everyone asking me. I weigh more now than when I delivered my dd.

ldovey83 · #9 October 11th, 2010, 04:24 PM

Thanks ladies.. It really has had me bummed though.. I know I am PM'sing.. AF is due this weekend, and I am really not looking forward to her presence, and I don't like the reminder that she brings with her..

luvmykids623 · #10 October 11th, 2010, 06:37 PM

I'm so sorry Lindsey! I'm going to go with the ladies that feel the friend wasn't talking about your weight. He was probably just going on the fact that DH had told him you were pregnant at one point. I'm sorry you're in such a bad place right now. I want you to know that you're not alone. I wish we lived closer so I could give you a great big hug!

ldovey83 · #11 October 11th, 2010, 07:59 PM

Aww thanks Lori... It would be nice to be closer to people who knew what I was going through.. We should do a meet up sometime.. That would be awesome..

MamaRN · #12 October 12th, 2010, 08:58 AM

Men can be so insensitive sometimes.

Pitridge · #13 October 12th, 2010, 09:04 AM

Men don't think, not with their head anyway. I know that your dh loves you no matter what, but they don't think.

When I was pg with the baby that I lost, I remember that I told some one at work, she was also pg and we were sharing, well a couple of days later I m/c. I saw that lady a month later and she asked me how it was going, if I had any m/s....I had to bite my tongue as I told her that I lost the baby.

Celena · #14 October 12th, 2010, 12:24 PM

Don't look too much into it honey, I don't think he meant any malice... because DH hadn't told him y'all lost your LO that's all that was. Really don't think he thought you gained weight like you thhought.

Altho guys CAN be seriously sensitivity challenged KWIM

tell him ((dh) he has a small man unit and see what he says

bet he might think twice before he says anything about weight gain or changes

bwahahahaha! I'm horrible I know.

Sweetie

huge hugs to you! Don't let it get you down, you're better than that, our weight fluctuates all the time we've all been thru so much and what the heck we eat some comfort food when we're down. It's just something we do... it shows easier on us then me, but they gain weight as well!

ldovey83 · #15 October 12th, 2010, 02:19 PM

Thanks ladies.. You all are the best...

I don't seriously know what I would do without you all... HUGS!!

Joanna1127 · #16 October 12th, 2010, 06:03 PM

Hugs! I am a teacher and had a coworker ask me how I was feeling the other day. I was trying to gather if she new about my loss or really thought, I was pregnant. So she continues asking if I've had any morning sickness or anything. I didnt know how to respond. I nervously chuckled and my eyes filled up and told her that she obviously hadn't heard the news. She felt terrible afterwards and so did I!

LindseyE117 · #17 October 13th, 2010, 02:45 PM

I feel you. There are still people who ask "how I feel". I just smile and say that I feel fine. I am leaving here anyway so I do not have to explain anything to anyone. It does hurt though.