[MeganMomof5]

I just wanted to share with you all, what's been going on with me....The last month or more has been really hard...Knowing that so many hard dates were coming up, Ella's death date, my EDD with my 2nd loss, Ella's birthday etc...For the last year all I could think of was those dates...All I could think about was Ella, she was ALWAYS on my mind...Well I noticed since her birthday has passed, i'm in a better place...I still love her, and think about her, but she's not consuming every thought of every minute of the day...I think i'm finally starting to move on....I feel hope coming back to me, that I will have a baby, and things have happened for a reason...I feel like now I have closure on my 2nd loss, and I feel like i've grieved for Ella, and it's time to move on now...I usually wear a necklace with her name on it, but I took it off (Not saying i'm never going to wear it again), I just feel like I don't need to wear it every day...So yeah, i'm feeling so much better, not nearly depressed....I was hoping that once I got over the 1 year birthday, that things would be better and they are I do have to say that my baby fever has gotten really bad though lol (worse than it was before)

[missy123]

I am glad it is starting to get easier for you. With my first loss it took over a year for me to get to that place where the fog kind of lifted and I was able to think about the baby without crying and aching and every ounce of my being hurting. I lifted out of the depression and it felt good. Not that I don't still hurt and miss my baby but it felt good not to feel so horrible every waking moment. Does that make sense? I feel like my baby doesn't want me to be so sad just like it hurts my boys when they see me sad.

Hold onto that feeling of hope. We have seen so many success stories in here. Hang onto that... I hope you are next.

[mmllhh]

I'm so happy to hear that you are in a better place.

[Halfbaked]

I'm glad you're feeling better. We never forget, just show our love in a different way. Hopefully, your baby fever will be better this next month (with a bfp )

[ldovey83]

Megan I am so happy to see that things are getting better for you... I feel the same way.. Like I am able to start coming around.. I agree about the baby fever.. It is getting bad for me too.. Hang in there hun..

[ohnicole]

Megan, I'm so glad that you are starting to feel hopeful about the future You know what baby fever brings?????? BIG FAT STICKY POSITIVES!!!!!!!!!

[Brittanie]

Oh Megan I'm so glad to hear this! I admit, I've been worried about you.