[Jessica121706]

Looks like I'll be joining you ladies real soon.
My name is Jessica. I have one dd (sara) who is almost four. I found out today that the baby I am carrying has severe downs w/ a bad heart condition. The baby has no chance at normal survival so I am choosing to terminate the pregnancy and try again. I am against abortion but with a family already it will just make it harder if I get connected any more. I know a lot of jm is pro-life so please don't judge my decision, I feel bad enough about it already. I hope you ladies understand. My question for you is


How soon after your loss did you begin ttc again?

[tobi4]

Jessica, no judgement from me hun. My heart is absolutley breaking for you and the decision you have had to make. Theree just arent words enough for me to express to you how sorry I am that you have to go through this.
After my loss I only waited one cycle, but I was quite early, less than 8 weeks, so Im not sure what would be appropriate for you.
Take care Jessica. Post when ever you like, you will be welcomed here by many. ~hugs~

[ohnicole]

I am so sad that you've had to make such a difficult decision We were supposed to wait one cycle after our loss (at 12 weeks), but the cycle ended up being really long and we just tried right away. I say, try again when you feel ready.

[Toots216]

So sorry you had to deal with that difficult decision, and so sorry for your impending loss. Everyone here is wonderful!

Like the other girls have said, usually you only have to wait one cycle, unless you have complications. I hope your stay here is short!

[missy123]

No judgment... It is a hard decision for you and we are here for you. ((Hugs)) You will hurt and be heartbroken all the same. I am so sorry...

[kknapik]

So sorry to hear that! My thoughts and prayers are with you.
I have had 3 losses all around 9 weeks. My RE told me that you can try on the next cycle and this doesn't happen until your HCG returns to negative. My last loss my HCG was just over 147,00 the day we lost the hear beat and it took just about 7 weeks for my HCG to return to negative. I asked if we could just start trying right away but they advised me against it. They said that if I was to get pregnant before having a period that there is a good chance that my lining will not thicken up properly and become tri-layered which is necessary to support a pregnancy. The last thing I want to do is go through another loss.
Good luck to you!!

[ashj_1218]

What a horrible, horrible decision to have to make. My heart goes out to you

The other ladies have you covered for trying again physically. Give yourself some time to grieve though, so you might find you want to try immediately. Or you might want to wait a while longer. Go with what feels right to you.

[shen7]

Hi Jessica... I am so sorry about your baby's condition and the sad choices you've been faced with... HUGS!! I want to tell you though, that I completely support your decision. Although I wouldn't support an abortion for reasons of sheer convenience, here I believe you are making the humane decision that results in less suffering. It is a tragic calculus, but just know that I've seen some things happen to friends and family, that lead me to support you completely.



To answer your question: I waited for a couple of cycles after both of my losses because of anemia. I wanted to be nice and strong again physically before trying again. After the first one, I also waited because of stress - I was starting a new job in a new state and we were buying a new house for the first time, and I was too stressed to DTD often enough.

[Pitridge]

No judgment here either, you are making a very hard decision but it's for the best for the baby.

I was told to wait 2 cycles, every doctor is different.

[.:Shortcake:.]

HUGS! I am so sorry your having to make this decision. We are here for you. As far as how long to wait most doctors tell you to wait one cycle for dating purposes or 3 cycles but mine told me there is not medical reason to wait. If your body isn't ready it won't get pregnant.

[luvmykids623]

No judgment here either. The decision you are faced with is so hard, and I'm so sorry that you are in that position. It's a devastating, heartbreaking place to be, I'm sure. The ladies here are wonderful, and I hope you find some comfort here. With my first loss I was told to wait 3 months so I did and I was miserable every second. My second we started trying before my first cycle returned and were lucky enough to conceive. I had a d&c with my last loss in September, and I was told to wait 1 cycle. It surely is taking it's time getting here.

[JessP]

When to try is emotional, and physical. Technically your body won't get pregnant if its not ready. Many doctors say to wait three months to give your body time to heal. Some say one cycle for dating purposes. I was 15 weeks and 12 weeks with my losses. We waited the three months after the first loss. We aren't planning to TTCAL again.
I am so sorry you are going through this.