[Celena]

I've been faced with several births lately and pregnancy announcements ( let me clairify, in real life at home not here on ttcal), even tho I generally feel peaceful about it all more so than EVER.... those negative feelings surface..... angered that I feel like it should be my turn (so many of us do or have), jealous that happens so easily for some when we've been trying for so long. At the same time I try to think positive....... Then I just have these dreams and visions of our little one in ous arms after birth, check up appt and interaction with their half sibs. The excitement of a new little addition. I feel it in my heart we will be blessed, but when Lord? I've been trying to learn patience angry know it happens in His time, that now is a perfect time as any... we're so ready! I'm super excited ready!!! Bring on the extremely painful Tata's, the morning sickness, bathe aches in the belly from growing larger and finally the flutters or movements all the discomfort of pregnancy.... bring it on! Bring on our healthy baby!

[missy123]

Oh I am with ya girly... But you know that! Be angry, be jealous - it is ok and normal to feel all of it. Just don't loose sight of who you are and what you love about life in the meantime.

Much love to you!

[BeccaM]

Celena, I completly understand how you feel. It is normal to have those feelings. I know in my heart that your time will come and you will be holding your lil one soon.

[Celena]

#1 Becca you don't have to hide your siggy in my posts honey, esp since this one does say pg/birth mentioned But thank you for being so thoughtful! I'm happy and makes me feel excited to see you're graduating!!!

Missy love you too girlie. I so know you know... eye to eye babe.

My ******* went and looked at some newborn photo's of my friend's babe that was born the day before Thanksgiving. It was exciting to see him finally, but I think seeing her man holding him it jerked some negative emotions. Then a couple girls I went to high school with had their babies... it's just allot to take in sometimes. Then there's those who don't want to get pg, but do... or just had a baby and are getting knocked up again. It's the same thing just a different day, different set of emotions.

I just wish the ttcal part of the journey was over with and we were moving onto the pregnancy part, then the rainbow baby's birth and so onto our full circle family.

[MeganMomof5]

(((hugs)))) Celena! I understand how your feeling, as I struggle with the same feelings almost daily...As hard as it is, I just try to force myself to think about the positives...I'm not always good about it, and some days i'm just pissed off and mad, and I think it's alright to feel that way sometimes...I've noticed that my negative thinking really bogs me down...Today at church the message was about being thankful in the good times and in the bad times...Not to be thankful for the bad things that happen, but to be thankful in general...He said when your feeling down, think things are really bad say this to yourself "it could be worse"...which is so true...I've struggled with my feelings thinking things have been so horrible, but when I say those words "it could be worse" it's so very true!...Just remember we are all here for you Celena, and I know in my heart that it will happen for you, you will get your rainbow baby along with the rest of us

[ohnicole]

Celena, I so know what you are talking about... that jealousy and anger just never seems like it goes away. Not until we're holding our rainbow babies, I guess. You are so right- it IS your turn!

[asunflower]

God needs to hear our anger and jealousy too. He wants all of us. The good with the bad and it is ok to be angry with God. But we also need to pray continuously and ask for what we want so keep praying, keep the faith and know that God is good and he hears your prayers and he will answer them. He loves you and will give you your turn and all of us too!

[luvmykids623]

I'm so sorry you have to know what this feels like Celena. I wish I could take the pain, jealousy, anger, frustration, etc. away for you and for all of us.