[LindseyE117]

My hubby and I tried really hard this cycle, and I had really high hopes. I mean, I felt with everyone else on the board pregnant, maybe we would get our Christmas gift also.

I highly doubt that now. Even though AF has not shown, it is due tomorrow and I have gone through 4 or 5 HPTs. All BFN's. I am devestated, hurting, upset, angry, and I don't know what else. I am really hoping that I can make an appointment with an OB-GYN here and see if I can try something-anything.

Can anybody tell me anything about Clomid? My hubby does not think I need it, but after almost 3 years now (3 years in April) of TTC and one loss, I am devestated. I want my baby. I hate walking through baby isles in the stores and seeing all these pregnant ladies walking by. I feel it is just no fair.

[missy123]

Oh, I am so sorry honey. I understand the pain and frustration of TTC, especially when you have been trying for as long as you have.

Have you had any testing done at all by the doctor?

((Hugs)) I wish there was a magic way to take away your pain.

[Joanna1127]

I completely understand how you feel. I think I would definitely pursue some kind of testing or something like Clomid to help out a bit.

hugs!

[ashj_1218]

Yeah, I agree that it is time for someone to take this seriously and for you to get some tests run. Even if you had the major ones in the past, I would at least check on hormones, since they change so often. Has your doctor referred you to a specialist? If not, I would demand it. The specialist might be able to pin point a problem pretty quickly. You never know.

Is it possible your husband is worried about going to a specialist because it might be him? I know lots of men rebel against help because it might turn out they are the issue and it will make them feel like "less of a man." My doctor flat out brought that up in our meeting, that whatever the results, there was no reason for either of us to take blame (and I believe it was aimed more at my DH). It might be time for a talk with your DH too. Because making a comment "you don't need clomid" might mean more than just that. Is he absolutely on the same page?

I really, really know where you are coming from. I have been having the same thoughts of being absolutely fed up and feeling like it is not fair. I know people having their 3-4-5-6th babies with NO issue whatsoever and there are so many in here who can't have one, or two. Or struggle so hard to get their dream babies. I go between wanting to smack pregnant people and wanting to curl into a ball and die. I feel like it will never happen again for us. And that is heartbreaking. Feel free to PM me if you ever want to. I wish I could make it better.

[ohnicole]

Lindsey, I'm so sorry you're having a rough time TTC long term, especially with a loss, is SO HARD. I agree that you will feel better if you start moving forward on figuring out what the problem is. I hope you can find a reproductive endocrinologist to run some tests on both you and DH and then move forward with treatments to get your little one.

I think maybe Ash hit the nail on the head about your DH being afraid. But 3 years is too long- it will drive a person crazy I started fertility treatments about 4 months ago, so if you have any specific questions, feel free to PM me.

[luvmykids623]

I'm so sorry you're going through this. I think that testing might be in order too since you've been trying for so long. You'll be in my thoughts and prayers!

[LindseyE117]

Thanks guys. We have both done some testing. It was 2 years ago for me and since last April for my husband. I was told I was ok to concieve, but my husband does have lower sperm than normal. It seems he only has 80 mil per shot (TMI I know-sorry) and that normal is 120 mil. But the doctor said that we should be ok seeing how you only need 20 mil per shot to get pregnant. I worry about the costs of seeing a specialist, seeing how I did it before for me. Insurance does not cover it and I finally have money in savings for an emergency. I am so scared though that it might come to that again. We have had one failed IVF, and many other mishaps. I am really willing to try anything now though. I want just one more baby. My hubby is not getting any younger either.

[asunflower]

Have your hubby try Conception XR. It is pricey but my DH had the same issue and we started it and we have conceived 8 times since then!

[LindseyE117]

Originally Posted by asunflower

Have your hubby try Conception XR. It is pricey but my DH had the same issue and we started it and we have conceived 8 times since then!

Can you get that online?

[ohnicole]

My RE says that normal sperm count is 40 million per ejaculate... I think your hubby's numbers sound good. My DH is right at 40 million, and my RE doesn't even recommend IUI. I really hope that you guys can get pg soon!

[LindseyE117]

Originally Posted by ohnicole

My RE says that normal sperm count is 40 million per ejaculate... I think your hubby's numbers sound good. My DH is right at 40 million, and my RE doesn't even recommend IUI. I really hope that you guys can get pg soon!

Really? I looked up a fertility clinic close by and I am going to give them a call on Monday. I need to know how much this is going to cost us because we close on our new house on Thursday. Hopefully they can do payment plans.

[ohnicole]

I hope the fertility clinic has good news for you!

[LindseyE117]

Well I made an appointment with a clinic that I found rave reviews on. It is for 2-7-11 at 9am (right after my insurance kicks in). That way at least my visit and my blood work will be paid for. Hopefully I will not need it, but at least I am doing everything I can!

[.:Shortcake:.]

Hoping you get your sticky BFP before you appointment but glad you have a plan of action

[Erin84]

I'm so glad you guys are moving forward with the testing And yeah, your hubby's sperm count is perfectly fine. It's kind of like cycle days, ya know? One woman can be 26 days and another can be 35, and although neither one is the norm and there's a big gap in between, both are perfectly healthy So no worries there! And like Katie said, here's to hoping you get that sticky BFP before you even have to see the RE!

[martilynne]

good luck! I hope you get a BFP before your appointment

[LindseyE117]

Me too. I cannot believe that we are coming up on 3 years now. The time goes by so quickly. I was really hoping my last pregnancy would be the one.