Did anyone else do this?

wishfulgal · #1 January 19th, 2011, 05:24 PM

....just feel really sorry for themselves and feel like you "deserve" something good/fun after your loss?

I think I'm going to take my son and go visit my family (they live 7 hours away) next week and go with my little sister to get massages or something fun. This has just been an extremely crappy year, and just when I thought the pain was ending, we're back to square one. I'm probably being really irrational and selfish, but I just feel like I need to do something nice for myself. My DH is fine with me going to see my family and thinks it will be good for me.

SkyBaby · #2 January 19th, 2011, 05:28 PM

I did that. On the way home from the hospital confirming the loss, my husband took me to a zoo. I love animals and he knows it, so he surprised me.

angel3y35 · #3 January 19th, 2011, 05:49 PM

I don't think you're being irrational or selfish. If it will make you feel better then I say do it.

Joanna1127 · #4 January 19th, 2011, 05:55 PM

I've tried to do small things for myself, but ultimately nothing will make me happy besides another BFP.

AZsnowflake · #5 January 19th, 2011, 05:57 PM

I took myself out to eat more and also bought myself a nice pair of coach shoes. It did lift my spirits, I think you should do it if you can!

.:Shortcake:. · #6 January 19th, 2011, 06:31 PM

I have felt that way and actually got a tattoo & piercing as well as went to the bar with DH. HUGS! I don't think your being selfish. Go and have a good time.

TnPhotoMama81 · #7 January 19th, 2011, 06:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SkyBaby

I did that. On the way home from the hospital confirming the loss, my husband took me to a zoo. I love animals and he knows it, so he surprised me.

That is really sweet of your husband

I don't think you are being selfish at all.

missy123 · #8 January 19th, 2011, 07:27 PM

No, you are not being selfish at all... Enjoy, Take Pictures and keep us updated

StaceygirlPa · #9 January 20th, 2011, 03:08 AM

I don't think you are being selfish at all. After I got the news that my HCG was falling I left work that day and went out and got a new coat for myself.

onedaysoon · #10 January 20th, 2011, 04:13 AM

When I was discharged from the hospital DH broght me to my favorite greasy spoon for a poutine (Quebecois food lol - fries, with cheese curds and gravy, yum) since I hadn't eaten in almost 30 hours (in case they had to do D&C). Then I took a week off work (unpaid).

I say do it. It's not selfish if it's good for you.

skittle2011 · #11 January 20th, 2011, 04:39 AM

I do this every month!!! I decided in the 2ww what I can look forward to if I have a BFN this month. I try to pick something that I don't do very often so that even if I am not pregnant, I have something to look forward to. Like skiing or something that I can't do pregnant. Not selfish - at all! You need to self soothe!

#12 January 20th, 2011, 05:03 AM

We spent about $600 right after our loss. It was in our "delivery fund" for her birth. So yep, I felt owed something and we bought ourselves a lot of things...like Blackberry phones, jewelry (that represented the baby), and we were even going to get tattoos but didn't end up doing it yet.

ashj_1218 · #13 January 20th, 2011, 07:31 AM

NOT AT ALL SELFISH!!

You are right, it has been a rough time and when times are rough, doing something for you (and your son) is completely deserved. I don't remember if I did anything after my losses, but I can say that I understand wanting to. You do deserve for something to be all about you and take a few hours away from the pain you feel. I hope you have a great time with your family and it rejuvenates you.

I have to say, I do stuff for myself quite often. It can be as simple as sitting on the couch with a cup of cocoa and reading during my son's nap. Or as big as going to an amusement park just because I can. I feel like if I never treat myself, I will get tired and burnt out. So, you know I don't object to this, even without having to have a "reason."

byebaby · #14 January 21st, 2011, 04:27 PM

I felt like I deserved something for what I went through. That was one of the most horrible experiences in my life. I lost my grandpa whom I was very close to in late 2010 and am still not over it. When I found out in December that I was pregnant I thought, I lost my grandpa but now I get a new baby to help me through that loss. Unfortunately I had to deal with the loss of my child next. I decided that I deserved to have ice cream every night and watch my favorite TV show on DVD every episode from beginning to end, so while I recovered from surgery that is what I did.
Don't feel bad for wanting something to make you happy after the loss. Do what you need to.