[.:Shortcake:.]

When you got pregnant the first time would you have wanted to know everything you do now with miscarriages or would you have wanted it to be how it was and you not really thinking it could happen to you?

[SillyKitty]

I wish I could go back to being innocent. I had two healthy pregnancies before my miscarriages, and while I worried some about a miscarriage in the early weeks, it was nothing like how I worried after my first miscarriage. It will never be the same.

Well with my first daughter, the first thing I told my mom is that I wasn't making plans because I might miscarry. With my second daughter, I worried a lot about it but felt positive about the end result. With my loss, I must have known something was wrong because I asked for betas, I asked for an ultrasound, I said the words "missed miscarriage" a thousand times. I just felt negative. So I feel like I've always had the miscarriage worry in my mind anyway, just because I know how common it is since I've been on message boards since before I was pregnant so I know so many people who've experienced them.

[.:Shortcake:.]

I wish I could go back to being "innocent" as well.

[~LaurenNoel~]

Me too. I did not lose a pregnancy before Wesley, but I bled and passed a lot of clots, so I never had an "innocent" time.

[StaceygirlPa]

I wish I could go back to being "innocent" as well.
Now I have the fear will I ever get pregnant and stay pregnant more then couple of weeks since the last two losses were chemical's.

[Shadeauxe]

I can't really answer this question until I get pregnant again. I have had one pregnancy with zero issues and another that failed. So, I won't know how the loss affects my mindset until I am on pregnancy #3. I would like to think that I can chalk the loss up to being an anomaly, but who knows.

[ashj_1218]

I would have wanted it the same. Sure, it snuck up on me and blew me away. But I think that knowing about miscarriages and knowing about the grief and pain would have caused me even more trauma. Waiting is one of the hardest things and knowing I had to wait for a loss to happen to me...no way. I did not really do "innocent" either, since I lost a pregnancy before Liam. But somehow, it did not affect me the same. I can't explain why...but the losses after Liam (and if I would have lost Liam) hit me so much harder, like aching grief. The other was like "it wasn't meant to be." But I still would not have changed things.

[j&jmom]

I don't know about then, but I wish I didn't have to worry the next time I get pg whether this one is going to stick. In my ignorance, I thought that if you had 2 healthy pregnancy that you wouldn't have a mc. It was a slap to the face! I'll never be ignorant again.

[missy123]

I sooooooooooo wish I could go back to being ignorant about it all.

A few months before I got pregnant with Corey, I went to the doctors and had a positive pregnancy test. I was excited but then "got my period" a few weeks later. I wondered to myself "how could the doctors test have been wrong" and went about my days not giving much thought to it. I knew nothing about miscarriage, I jut figured I must not have really been pregnant. Looking back it was a miscarriage, I just did not know. (There was no internet back then and girls did not talk about these things)

Then pregnant with Corey, not a care in the world... Pregnant with Dylan right away and even though I had placenta previa and was put on bed rest figured nothing could really go wrong (it resolved itself later on)... got pregnant with Kyle a few years later, very uneventful pregnancy and had little prenatal care (no insurance).

Fast forward 13+ years and wow, reality about infertility and miscarriage has slapped me in the face hard and made me really, really appreciate the easy time I had in my early years. It has made me more sympathetic as a person to other people in general.

[AZsnowflake]

I want to be "innocent" again as well.

[MeganMomof5]

I remember my pregnancy with Ella like it was yesterday...I never thought it would happen to me!...I had spotting in her pregnancy, the first time I ever had spotting while pregnant...I had a bad feeling about things for the whole first trimester...Then once I got into the 2nd trimester I felt more relaxed...I wish I would of been more aware of things, maybe I would of found out about her being dead sooner (because I didn't feel her move)...but i'm not sure if I would of wanted to know or not...with my misarriages it was easier, since i had just had a loss before that....I think by my 3rd loss, I just expected it...I wish that I could go back to the innocence again...Pregnancy will never be the same

[zkat]

I will forever miss the innocence and carefree feeling of my first pregnancy, but even then I was very guarded. I think like everyone else, I knew something wasn't right.

[*SamF*]

I wish I could go back to the innocent stage too.
I was so excited with my first pregnancy. We told our family they day we got our BFP then when I started bleeding everything kind of crashed down.
My second I was still hopping that the first was just a fluke. That's when I got referred to the RE (mainly because of my age) then the third I just knew was going to end.
With the Twin, I had built my hope up after seeing his/her heartbeat. But I was nervous for the remainder of the pregnancy with DS.
This time around I thought maybe having a healthy pregnancy after the loss of the twin rebooted me and I was safe again. apparently not.

I really miss pregnancy bliss, that feeling of all is right with the world and my baby is perfect.

[SkyBaby]

I have been pregnant exactly once and lost our bean around 4 or 5 weeks in. I'm nervous but excited to get pregnant again. I want to go back to being worry free. I did never think loss could happen to me until it did. I'll probably be happy, but nervous when I'm pregnant again.

[*Tracy*]

being innocent and worry free

[Celena]

Innocent, blissful and worry free would be nice... but even with my 1st back when I was 21 I worried about going thru a miscarraige then even tho I never had been pregnatn before. Then what do you know after that my 2nd pregnancy was a loss... fast forwarding to now I'm re-married, to my soulmate and we would like to have a child of our own together we've been thru 4 losses and 2 confirmed chemicals. Not sure that I'll ever not be worrisome altho I tried to practice it a little this past pregnancy with Rocky.

[ohnicole]

I'm kind of conflicted about this... of course, I will miss the innocence of pregnancy before loss. But now that I know about my thyroid issues and clotting disorder, I can treat them and hopefully avoid another loss. So maybe I had to trade my innocence for the chance to have a healthy baby? I try to tell myself that anyway.

[.:Shortcake:.]

I read though all these answers and I honestly feel so conflicted myself. I wish I would have known about it and I don't. I wish I could go back to innocence and I don't. I guess it really doesn't matter as long at the end of the road I have a healthy earth baby that's really all that matters to me.

[Braysmomma03]

I wish I could go back to being innocent. With my son I didnt even realize that i MIGHT be pregnant until I was 9 weeks. Now I know when I do get pregnant again Im going to be a nervous wreck and I won't be able to enjoy being pregnant. I also don't think I will be able to bond with the baby until the baby is close to being born because i am always going to wonder "what if i loose it??"