Forum: Trying to Conceive after Loss
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April 6th, 2011, 03:55 AM
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Mega Super Mommy
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Join Date: Feb 2011
Location: Maine
Posts: 3,189
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Why is it that a man can be so eager to DTD every day of the month but when it counts, he seems to lose all interest in it? Yesterday I initiated the loving, but my BF couldn't finish because he was "too tired". I don't believe that for a second. I have been careful to not fill him in on the details but he did know that this week was "a good time". Now all of a sudden he can't fulfill the only job he has. I know it's not right for me to be upset with him but I can't help it. And of course, I can't tell him how disappointed I am. That would put way too much pressure on him for next cycle. I thought I was Oing yesterday which still would've made our timing good, but today my temps are still down. So, I have another chance today but I'm afraid he'll chicken out again.
I am really tempted to just tell him that it's too late so that maybe we can have a successful BD today. What do you ladies think? Is that little white lie ok?
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April 6th, 2011, 04:04 AM
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POAS Queen
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Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: San Diego, CA
Posts: 3,947
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Little white lies are absolutely okay  Or just don't bring it up at all, tell him you're still randy from "last time" and that you want to rock his world or something........ It's 4am here, I has no creativity.
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With us on earth for five short days, with us in our hearts forever.
(Thank you Natasha for this beautiful graphic of Andrew, and to the ladies of the Nov 10 PR who help me in carrying on his memory.)
Jan. 2009: Came off years of BCP and started TTC
March 2010: BFP -- finally!
Oct. 22, 2010: Drew is born, but has to stay in the NICU because of cord complications resulting in oxygen deprivation and brain problems =(
Oct. 27, 2010: I held him in my arms while Daddy, Grandma, Great-Uncle and I sang him to sleep =( Hardest thing I've ever done...
June 14, 2011: Drew's baby brother or sister waved hi to us with a BFP!
June 25, 2011: Natural miscarriage... Can we please catch a break here?
Nov. 2011: 100mg Clomid followed by 2mg Estrogen, Ovidrel trigger, and 200mg progesterone suppositories 2x/day 14 days. BFN.
Dec. 2011: 2nd medicated cycle. BFN.
Jan. 2012: Took a month off to breathe...
Feb. 2012: Same regimen of Clomid and other meds, add IUI. 2 eggs and 8.5 million swimmers. BFN.
March 2012: 75 IU Follistim CD 3-11, follie scan CD 8 showed 6 follies likely to mature. Triggered, IUI on CD 14, 4 million swimmers. BFN.
April 2012: 75 IU Follistim CD 3-10. Scan showed 2 mature follies, 2 almost certain to mature, and two not likely but possible. (All 6 evenly and perfectly spaced out between the left and the right.) Triggered, IUI CD 13 with 5 million swimmers. BFN.
May 2012: 75 IU Follistim starting CD 3. Waiting to O. Timed intercourse. Likely 5 follies to mature.
^^ Click graphic for chart ^^
 
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April 6th, 2011, 04:05 AM
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Platinum Supermommy
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Join Date: May 2009
Location: Pennsylvania
Posts: 14,553
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I tell DH as little as possible about it because there for awhile he was having performance anxiety  So I would tell him that you already O'd and then initiate some lovely BD
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April 6th, 2011, 05:35 AM
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It's me
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Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Massachusetts
Posts: 5,064
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Similar thing happened to me this month and it was annoying. I do love the title of the thread though, it made me laugh.
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April 6th, 2011, 05:43 AM
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Mega Super Mommy
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Join Date: Feb 2011
Location: Maine
Posts: 3,189
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Thanks ladies! Luckily I didn't even have to lie. I was prepared to but then he stepped up to the plate. Maybe it's a morning thing. I'm still a little annoyed, but less so, now that our chances are better than if nothing happened. Phew!
Quote:
Originally Posted by Shadeauxe
Similar thing happened to me this month and it was annoying. I do love the title of the thread though, it made me laugh.
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LOL! Thanks! I'm sorry you had to deal with the same thing! Frustrating!
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April 6th, 2011, 05:44 AM
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Platinum Supermommy
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Join Date: May 2009
Location: Pennsylvania
Posts: 14,553
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Glad things "worked out"  Hoping you catch that eggie this month!
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April 6th, 2011, 05:49 AM
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Platinum Supermommy
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Join Date: Sep 2008
Posts: 16,285
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Glad it worked out!!
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Waiting for our ELF to get here!
Thank you .:Shortcake:.!! for my awesome siggy!
My Forever Babies- 07/20087.5 weeks, 10/2008 4.5 weeks 12/2008 4 weeks 06/2009 our twin 7.5 weeks 08/2010 4 weeks 10/2010 Mr. Spud 9.5 weeks 04/2011 twins 6 weeks
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April 6th, 2011, 05:54 AM
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Waiting for our Miracle.
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Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: Clarence, Pa
Posts: 4,828
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Happy to hear things worked out. I think guys feel more pressure when they know we are "o". I had the same problem right before my loss.
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April 6th, 2011, 06:02 AM
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Mega Super Mommy
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Join Date: Feb 2011
Location: Maine
Posts: 3,189
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Thanks! And I think his fears are more about the possibility of another m/c than anything else. I wish men were able to get in touch with their feelings/emotions better.
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April 6th, 2011, 07:10 AM
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Platinum Supermommy
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Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: South Carolina
Posts: 7,934
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I am glad everything worked out. When I would tell DH that the time was good he would get performance anxiety. I think your DH's fear of another m/c could definately be impacting him.
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