[nala139]

Hi,
I thought i would start posting over here because I am just going through a hard time with all this stuff and need a place to vent and ask questions. I am Megann (28) and DH is Greg (26), we had been TTC 13 months when I had a chemical pregnancy in Feb and then got a BFP in March. Last Sunday i was supposed to be 9 1/2 weeks, patiently waiting for my first midwife appt when I started spotting. I went in on Mon and they did an ultrasound, it had showed the baby had died at 6 1/2 weeks. I couldn't even beleive it, having a missed miscarriage was seriosly my worst fear the whole pregnanacy and here I was, 3 weeks after the baby died with just a tiny bit of brown spotting. I just couldn't beleive that after waiting for SO long for this BFP, this is what happened. I got the cytotec pills to start the miscarriage because nothing was really happening but by Wed I had started bleeding like a period. I bled very heavily through the weekend so i went in Mon to have my HCG levels drawn and they were still over 4,000! However, Mon night I passed a large amount of tissue and then my bleeding got a lot lighter, so I am soooo hoping that is the end of it. I had my levels drawn again yesterday and am waiting for the result. I really hope it is a lot lower or they will have to do another ultrasound to check for any more tissue. I really want all this over and I DON'T want to take the cytotec, I'm afraid that it will be painful. My husband just went through a varicocele repair in March (same month I got my BFP) to hopefully help with subfertility (his SA showed low morphology). I am truely hoping the surgery worked and that we don't have to wait so long for a BFP again. Honestly, I really want start TTC again immediately, like next time I ovulate. My midwife said it would probably be ok to do that. Do any of you guys have experience with that? I know most doctors say to wait a certain amount of time. I am also worried because I just read the post about wacky cycles after loss. I was pretty reugular before this and always knew when my body was ovulating so I really don't know what to expect! I just feel so lost and I miss being pregnant, but I am scared to be again. Anyway, it will be nice to get to know you guys, thanks for listening.

[KeepingFaith]

Welcome! So sorry for your loss. I hope that you get results from your blood test and do not need any medical intervention. As far as trying again, we always say as long you feel emotionally ready go for it! As long as there is no medical reason not to try. A lot of us tried before we even got our first AF after the loss. Good luck, I hope you get a sticky BFP quickly!

[LindseyE117]

Welcome! I am sorry for your loss. We all know how painful they can be. It helps to vent to ladies who have been there.

As for TTC, different doctors will tell you different things. I say that if you feel ready, then go for it.

[StaceygirlPa]

Welcome! Sorry for you loss. As the other ladies said its up to you when you want to try again. I have been told your body wont get pregnant again if it isn't ready. I have had three losses and the only one I actually waited to start ttc again was the first one.

[fromustobaby]

I am so sorry for your loss...
I had a very similar thing happen 3 weeks ago (missed miscarriage - the worst nightmare scenario for a newly pregnant woman), and had to take cytotec...it hurt until the baby passed, and then it didnt hurt too much more after that...I ended up bleeding for almost 3 weeks, it wasnt horrible pain, but mentally, it was draining...

[lindsey2000k]

I am so sorry for your loss.
Cyctotec .... I took it in March to pass my baby that grew to 9 weeks. Its not to bad it put me into labor for about 2 hours and as soon as the baby passed I was out of pain.

Ditto what Stacey said my DR also said no reason to wait your body will not get pregnant unless its ready. But it is easier to track your cycle if you do what for A/F.

[.:Shortcake:.]

Welcome. I am so very sorry for both of your losses. I wish we never had to welcome anyone because we know the pain your going through. Please know that we are here for you. You can rant, cry, scream, ask questions we are here no matter what. I agree with the other ladies as far as my doctor told me I wouldn't get pregnant if my body wasn't ready. You could wait and see if your body is still regular after the m/c and if it's not then start temping or using OPK's. I hope you don't have to worry about that and your body goes back to normal quickly. HUGS!

[nala139]

Thank you so much, what you all have said has made me feel better about trying again as soon as possible. I got good news today, my hcg from yesterday was 529, down from over 4000 Monday! The nurse said they think that it is probably complete so I will get another draw weekly until my level is less than 3. I am also just brown spotting today, no more red bleeding. Ugh, I don't want to go back to ttc because it took so long to get pregnant and I don't want to face the dissapointment again month after month but at the same time I so badly want to have a baby and I am willing to endure anything I have to to become a mommy.

[luvmykids623]

I'm so very sorry for your loss. I hope when you start ttc again you get your sticky bfp right away. In the meantime I hope you find some comfort here. The ladies are amazing!