How will you feel... (pg & loss ment)

.:Shortcake:. · #1 May 25th, 2011, 11:15 AM

How will you feel when you get your BFP?
Or for the graduates how did you feel when you did get your BFP?
Any tips on keeping anxiety down?

owensmom · #2 May 25th, 2011, 12:31 PM

I had one m/c, then a BFP (full term LC), now two m/c...it is SO much of a roller coaster ride. all of my BFP have been bittersweet because I am so afraid to get too excited. This last time I was SO happy to make it to 7 weeks since I had always lost the babies before then...apparantly it wasn't my magic number since it ended in a m/c - I think making the end so much more of a harder fall since we were so sure and had told our families.

I think the only way to keep anxiety down is to not think about it so much - which is what everyone is doing when the are here on JM.

Not to say that if we all relax it'll be ok - just that I find the weeks when all I do is text my friends about where they are in the cycles and get on JM I think about it too much and really get worked up about the BFN's.

I have also started to look at my life a little differently - for a while there I felt as if I was on the edge of a deep depression if I didn't get pregnant (and stay that way) soon. I really took a step back and looked at my life and decided to focus on all the good things that I did have. To try and live my life and enjoy every single day then to focus on what I didn't have - or be jealous of all the fertile mertles out there.

sorry that was long.

JessP · #3 May 25th, 2011, 01:04 PM

How will you feel when you get your BFP? welllllll see below.
Or for the graduates how did you feel when you did get your BFP? I was a little shocked to be honest. We weren't TTC , then the excited phase, then the scared phase. Due to having later losses I actually didn't get toooo worried until I got closer to those weeks.
Any tips on keeping anxiety down? For me personally I opted to not do early u/s or blood work. For me that helped to keep the fears at bay. I didn't have the every other day of stress. I did have an ER visit and u/s and then another u/s at 10 weeks due to anxiety. The thing that helped the most were the twice weekly heartbeat checks as I went over my loss weeks. That and the ladies on PAL. I don't know what I would have done without others to talk to about it. Haveing people that understood the crazies really helped. Take it one day at a time. Don't worry about next week. Heck sometimes you have to take it one hour at a time to not let the crazies get you. I still have moments but they are better now.

TnPhotoMama81 · #4 May 25th, 2011, 01:54 PM

How will you feel when you get your BFP? Happy and excited but cautious of course

Any tips on keeping anxiety down? not really ;[

luvmykids623 · #5 May 25th, 2011, 02:21 PM

I will be over the moon happy, and then immediately scared out of my mind until my baby is in my arms. I was never able to figure out a way to keep the anxiety down in my last 2 successful PAL. I'm open to suggestions though!

lindsey2000k · #6 May 25th, 2011, 03:06 PM

I will be a total nut job.
First freaking out that it might be another Ectopic, then once we are out of the clear from that freaking out until every ultrasound to comfirm we still have a beating heart.

I know now that I can give myself the shots everyday so my nerves about that are less.

outnumberedX3 · #7 May 25th, 2011, 05:26 PM

Excited, scared and nervous. Mostly scared. I'm going to try not to let myself get "attached" at first because I don't want to get let down again. Easier said than done.

nala139 · #8 May 25th, 2011, 10:30 PM

I am going to get an earlier ultrasound! I was terrified that I was going to have a missed miscarriage and then that is what happened

I don't want to go through that again. I think I will start getting excited once I see a heartbeat.

doremi · #9 May 25th, 2011, 11:12 PM

I will be relieved to be done TTC, and actually pregnant, but very nervous. I don't think it is realistic to think I'll ever really relax during the pregnancy. I didn't truly 100% relax with my healthy pregnancy until I was 33 weeks!! And I also know that I'm going to feel an immediate bond to any baby I carry, regardless of whether I make it to term, so I'm really hopeful that this recent m/c is my one and only

.:Shortcake:. · #10 May 26th, 2011, 03:45 AM

I'm going to feel scared/anxious. I will be constantly wondering when I will lose it. After being through so many losses I just will never feel comfortable until I'm holding my baby in my arms.

missy123 · #11 May 26th, 2011, 04:41 AM

I am still scared and anxious. The other day I bought 2 packs of diapers (I had a coupon and they were on sale) and I keep thinking to myself "when I lose the baby who can I give the diapers to". Honestly, I still don't fully believe that I will have a baby. Rebecca let me borrow her doppler and if I could keep it strapped on I would.

I always thought that when I got my BFP that I would be carefree and enjoy every second no matter what. NOT!

ashj_1218 · #12 May 26th, 2011, 07:04 AM

How will you feel when you get your BFP? The same I felt everytime in the past...elation, fear, anxiety, denial, happiness, shock, etc!
Or for the graduates how did you feel when you did get your BFP? I was in disbelief and honestly way more negative about it than I would have liked to have been. I did not even tell DH in a nice way. Just a text message that said "here we go again." But there was still that excitement, way down below. It just was not my highest emotion.
Any tips on keeping anxiety down? Get a doctor whom you trust absolutely and is sensitive to your fears. I think it is the most important thing. DO NOT let them convince you that you are being crazy or over-the-top. If the one you have is not cutting it, get a new one. And try to find a way to trust your body, the best you can manage. It will make your experience more positive and keep your anxiety down. If you can figure out how to sit with the anxiety and let it pass...it is so much better than fighting it. But honestly, I think you will always be anxious. I still am at 21 weeks...with no reason to think anything will go wrong at this point. But it does come and go in waves. And gets easier to handle the further along you get.

Hoping all the ladies trying for that BFP get to experience those emotions very soon!

SkyBaby · #13 May 26th, 2011, 07:37 AM

I was nervous at first, but settled in pretty quick. I thought I was gonna have lots of anxiety. I did at first, but that went away. Right around week 7 (past my milestone) and when we saw the heart beat, I started getting real attached. Right now, I'm not nervous about a loss at all. Almost to the second trimester.

pepper73 · #14 May 27th, 2011, 04:01 AM

I am sure I will be faced with a lot more fear than if I had never had a loss. It makes me angry because now I will never be able to be blissfully happy about a pregnancy. I will still be happy, but will always worry that something will go wrong again.

Shadeauxe · #15 May 27th, 2011, 05:18 AM

How will you feel when you get your BFP?
My mind does not allow me to think in advance of emotions. I think it's a defense mechanism. I hope I will be able to take a new pregnancy as a different experience from the one that was a loss. My loss was fairly early, so I am confident I'll fee fine after the first trimester.

Any tips on keeping anxiety down?
I don't feel anxiety very often. It's part of my genetics. My advice would be to figure out how to incorporate my DNA into yours so that you could become a new breed of anxiety resistant super women.