[acchickpea]

... On everything!!!!!
Maybe it's just me... but I feel like my sister-in-law is trying to be like me... I'm not trying to say that I'm superior then anybody but when there are many things that are similar it freaks me out!!!!!
I just need to vent this out because if I complain this to my friends and family I would probably be preceived differently... I hope that my JM friends won't judge me.
It started out that she's from Austrialia and then came over to visit my husband's older brother for the first time (won't say how it came to be.. that's a longer story). She then met the whole family. She went back to Aussie and then all of a sudden my brother in law said that they're getting married!!!! short time to know one another huh? But none the less was happy for them... She came to the US and then I find out that her Birthday is two days before mine (her's is July 10 and mine is July 12) really she couldn't have had a birthday after me at least or at least a week apart or more? Then I find out that she's in the similar field as me in construction (electrical Engineer and I'm an Architect/ drafter). I ended up getting her an interview for a job with a company that I used to work with because after a year here she couldn't find anything on her own. Which they created a position for her because of my reputation with them... (hope she owns up to the position)... Then she started to get all touchy feely over my DH (Really get your paws off my man! I told my DH if he realized it and he did but thought that Austrlians where really tight with family... ummm hello!!!! So he told her that he fealt a little uncomfortable with her too touchy.... (Really she should be touching her man and leaving mines alone!) Then she started to dress my brother in law like my husband!!!! For one my DH is more to age and his older brother, well has his unique own style that when he starts to wear something that is not "him" you figure.... My brother in law was complaining about how his pants were fitting...and that she picked out the outfit for him .....
She told me that she and DH were having issues and that they would not start a family anytime soon.... My DH and I announced that we were expecting (this was before March before my MC) and we announced it by doing scrable pieces and having them solve it saying "We're Pregnant" She said "I was going to do this when I tell everyone when get pregnant" (Um .... yeah you were).... We were so excited because this was goingt o be the FIRST grandkid for both sides of the family! Two weeks after I MC they announced at a family dinner that they were expecting.... TWO WEEKS after my mc!!!!! (this hurts a bit...) my mc was still on my mind and she announced to everyone not even 6 weeks... I mean she didn't even go to her first ultrasound!!!!....(maybe she would feel a little sensitive to my feelings... Guess not) She did say that she was not ready and had to resolve issues with her man.... What happened?????? Maybe a little competition???? Or is it my evil side thinking this? Now they are the ones that are able to bring in the first of the grandkids.... (not a big deal but would have been nice)... She said "you know... we weren't trying"...... I was sooooo livid!!! She know we were trying for almost 3 years..... Go ahead and rub that in my face.....
To add a cherry on top of all of this... before the whole pregnancy talk happened we had a casual conversation of what we would name our kids... I told her that my DH and I had a boys name already picked out and when we said it she said... " I was going to name my son that!" (oh hellllll nooooo... Is Jayden really common????) So now fast forward to today... she is going to find out the sex of the baby and if it's a boy I would like to see if she names him.... I have this bitter reaction if she did take the name my DH chose for our baby... (whenever that happens) Boy or a girl that she has... this will be my niece/ nephew.......and I can't hate that!
I can't believe I can't brush this from my mind... It has been three month but I still feel so bitter......

Thanks for listening Justmommies!!!! I really need to let this all out or I'd burst!!!!

[.:Shortcake:.]

Hugs! I am so sorry. It sounds like she is toxic in your life and I would suggest staying away from her as much as possible. You really don't need people like that in your life. I understand she is "family" but honestly family shouldn't treat you like that. ((HUGS))

[acchickpea]

Very toxic....... But she does it in a way that she's just the good little girl that she is..... I feel like it's one of those movies where the girl is trying to take over the other girl's life slowly and painfully..... There's plenty of movies like that and my husband thinks that I'm crazy for thinking that! True... I could be overthinking things... but it really does feel like it!

[.:Shortcake:.]

I would just ignore her as much as possible. Don't share information with her and just be civil but not friendly iykwim.

[acchickpea]

I know... she asked us what we were going to name a girl and my husband said we have one but we won't tell you.... (I giggled inside... so evil...) She said something in the lines of "... if you don't tell me we might have the same names....." Maybe true but I'd rather have her come up with the name then try to vibe off of what we have.... Mean but makes sense to us.......

[Shadeauxe]

Originally Posted by acchickpea

I know... she asked us what we were going to name a girl and my husband said we have one but we won't tell you.... (I giggled inside... so evil...) She said something in the lines of "... if you don't tell me we might have the same names....." Maybe true but I'd rather have her come up with the name then try to vibe off of what we have.... Mean but makes sense to us.......

Just tell her the girl name is Eglantine or Bertha. If she copies it, it's her own **** fault.

[acchickpea]

Originally Posted by Shadeauxe

Just tell her the girl name is Eglantine or Bertha. If she copies it, it's her own **** fault.

hEE HEE HEE... there were actually some Rite Aid ads in front of us at the time and my husband and I were just randomly reading out some drug names to them... like Claritin and Zyrtec...!!!!

We're sooo mean... We were really joking really....

[bassetmomma]

Sounds like she just wants the attention. Try not to give it to her! Sorry you have to deal with that.

[pepper73]

It definitely sounds like she's from one of those movies! I don't blame you for being thoroughly annoyed. I would be too. I agree that avoiding her as much as possible is a good idea. And I love the idea of telling her a ridiculous name...although, I'd feel bad for the child, lol.

[StaceygirlPa]

I agree with the other ladeis. She sounds very toxic. I wouldn't share any information with her at all.

[Jen71]

Ewwww... Sounds very yucky.
I agree with the others, be nice, but remain distant and share nothing with her but your thoughts on the weather.

[acchickpea]

Well ladies... I woke up this morning feeling awful for talking trash about my sister-in-law.... I really am not like this and I really should be happy for her because this is her first baby so I should be supportive. I just had a B*otch moment..... I think because July is coming and another birthday year is coming up with no kiddies still and I see her that should be me......
(welll just the pregnant part.... Let's not get too crazy now....)
Thanks for the

[*SamF*]

{hugs}

I think the pregnancy thing is what makes it all worse. The job and birthday things are not something she came up with as competition, both were already established before (obviously her birthday) and maybe she thinks you DH has a nice style, and her's needs help.
But she also sounds like she can't think about others feeling-especially about pregnancy. Since she hasn't had a loss, it's probably hard for her to put herself in your shoes, same with the TTC for a long time.

I would just back off seeing her for a while, give yourself some breathing room.

[acchickpea]

Originally Posted by *SamF*

{hugs}

I think the pregnancy thing is what makes it all worse. The job and birthday things are not something she came up with as competition, both were already established before (obviously her birthday) and maybe she thinks you DH has a nice style, and her's needs help.
But she also sounds like she can't think about others feeling-especially about pregnancy. Since she hasn't had a loss, it's probably hard for her to put herself in your shoes, same with the TTC for a long time.

I would just back off seeing her for a while, give yourself some breathing room.

I know.... They were established pre- knowing me...... but for some reason it just terribly bugs me..... (big sigh) If i think more into it maybe I'm just a Big Hater....
I don't want to be a Hater... I need some good vibes...... Happy thoughts.....