So confused

Mom.to.PinknBlue · #1 June 20th, 2011, 06:55 PM

I am so confused as what is going on with my body right now.
I started spotting for a few hours today and then nothing. All night last night I had the most horrible cramps ever. I could not decide if they were uterine cramps or poop cramps

So needless to say I laid with a pillow under my abdomen all night and was constantly getting woken up. My toes are starting to swell and I am just exhausted.
And of course add in the emotional distress and depression I am feeling.
I just feel like my body is just freaking out and doesn't even know what to do anymore. I started peeing on OPKs on Saturday to see how long it is taking me to ovulate every cycle. I mean why am I on CD 64 if you don't even include the m/c? I also ordered this thing from early pregnancy tests that tests your spit for ovulation. At this point I am just wanting answers. We are still hemming and hawing about TTC or NTNP, and I think right now we are just going to leave it in gods hands. But I think at the same time I need a hands on approach and DH is not against me using OPKs or this saliva thing to see if I am even ovulating. He has started to even wonder if my last AF was even AF. Because it was a 63 day cycle.
I don't even know if I can take medications to help me ovulate because of my history of blood clots. I feel like I am forever going to be on an endless and stressful road.
Don't get me wrong, I am very grateful for the beautiful daughter that I have. We TTC'd her for 7 months and my OB had started talking fertility specialists.
I love my daughter more then anything, but I am so ready for more kids. I know right now god may not have another child in his plans for us and that is fine. I know it will happen when it is ready. I am just desperately seeking answers, and sadly I am afraid I will never get the answers I seek.

I apologize that this is so long and winded and all over the place. My mind is just racing lately.

LilHerndon · #2 June 20th, 2011, 07:53 PM

I understand where you are coming from with the horrible wait for AF or even an answer as to if you're ovulating. I'm in a similar boat right now, I'm somewhere around CD 57 since my ectopic, and no sign of AF anywhere. I'm fairly sure I'm not ovulating, but I am breaking out like mad, tired as all hell, and irritable lately, so who knows when the hell AF will show. The only reason I ever even got an AF is because of my surgery I'm pretty sure, since I haven't had a "normal" cycle since last October.

My doc said she'll jumpstart AF in another week if still nothing, but that doesn't mean I'll ovulate or be any closer to that BFP. It's so disheartening, most of the time I feel like I'll never get that BFP, and if I do I just get to be terrified of it being ectopic. Why can't TTC be fun like I thought it was supposed to be?!

.:Shortcake:. · #3 June 21st, 2011, 03:29 AM

I would really suggest talking to your doctor and having them check your hormone levels. It sounds like your having annovulatory cycles. If you have not ovulated yet this cycle they can give you meds to bring on AF and "clean you out". My doctor did this before for me because she said it sometimes help after a loss to jump start your body again. Hugs!

Leanne78 · #4 June 21st, 2011, 07:08 AM

Amee - Has it only been 4 days since your mc? Not sure what the whole situation was (natural or D&C), but I think it's pretty normal to spot and cramp right now. If it keeps up though and is really severe, I would probably call your OB - maybe everything didn't pass? Since you were pregnant, I would assume that you had to have ovulated your last cycle. As far as ovulating now, I would think it could take a few weeks. My doctor told me after my mc, that it could take 4 - 8 weeks for AF to show up again. I don't think I've ovulated yet either, but I'm not worried since I'm only 3 weeks out from my mc. I would think at only 4 days past, your body is going through a lot and will be out of whack for a little while. Has your OB sat down and talked to you about what to expect? Did they show any concern about your extra long cycles?

acchickpea · #5 June 21st, 2011, 07:23 AM

Reading our body is such a stressful thing.... Makes me so jealous of the ladies that says..." oopsss... and we weren't really trying...." I agree with the ladies and think you should go see your doctor since your cycle is going on for 63 days... I'm sure that they can give you something to jump start a cycle... I'm very irregular and my doctor gave me provera to jump my cycle then clomid to help me ovulate... For me.... this has not helped me TTC but this could possibly help you!

melissalaw · #6 June 21st, 2011, 08:31 AM

I just saw my doctor this morning and he said that if my cycle didn't come back in 4 to 6 weeks to call him. He said at that point he would give me something to jump start AF. Also said he would do an ultrasound just to make sure there was nothing left. So if I was you I would check with your doctor. Maybe your doctor can give you something to jump start AF. Have you had your HCG levels checked to make sure they are back down to 0? If not I would ask that your doctor check your HCG levels. Hope you get some answers soon.

Leanne78 · #7 June 21st, 2011, 09:20 AM

It's only been 4 days though. Should she be looking into having a shot to jump start her AF yet? Just asking out of curiosity, not challenging anyone. I just noticed several people have suggested she call and check about getting that, but she only just had the miscarriage?

melissalaw · #8 June 21st, 2011, 09:38 AM

Your right Leann. I didn't notice that it had only been 4 days. I read the post to say that she was on CD 64 so it had been roughly 2 months since mc. My doctor said that he wouldn't jump start AF until it had been 4 to 6 weeks from now which would be roughly 6 to 8 weeks from D & C.

Mom.to.PinknBlue · #9 June 21st, 2011, 05:20 PM

Sorry my post wasn't so clear. It has only been 4 days since m/c.
When I went for my annual I had talked to my OB about my long cycle (63 days) and he said it was strange but could be a fluke, but if it happened again to let him know and we would check everything out. Even when I was nursing my cycles came like clock work. My hcg is down to 0. I think my body is just in a panicking mode, which I understand. Due to my history of clots they can't give me anything to jump start AF when I am able to. We were gonna do that last cycle but the risks just aren't worth it to me. So I'll be waiting. So with the m/c am I technically on like CD 4? I am so confused right now.
I apologize for the lack of clarity and knowledge.