For You

Shadeauxe · #1 July 14th, 2011, 09:38 AM

Do you hate other women who are pregnant when you're not?
Do you ask why them and not me?
Do you rage? Do you shut down? Do you cry all the time?
Do you over analyze every little thing?
It's perfectly normal.
Everyone handles grief in their own unique way.
Whatever way you end up grieving,
You are not crazy

Stop asking yourself:
Did I eat something I shouldn't have?
Did I take medicine I shouldn't have?
Is it because I had a drink before I knew I was pregnant?
Should I have rested more?
Nothing you did, intentionally or not, caused your miscarriage.
You did nothing wrong

Uterus, fallopian tubes, eggs,
Ovulation, menstruation, ferility,
Hormones, progesterone, HSG, HCG,
None of these things matter.
You are not defined by the functions of your body,
But by your spirit, your heart and your mind.
You are not a failure as a woman

Please don't torture yourself and beat yourself up.
You've taken some of the worst that life can throw at you,
And you still manage to keep moving forward.
That takes incredible strength of will and body.
You are a survivor.
Whether you have a rainbow baby yet or not,
You are an exceptional mother

pepper73 · #2 July 14th, 2011, 10:11 AM

Wow!! That is beautiful and inspiring!! Thank you so much for sharing that!!

Shadeauxe · #3 July 14th, 2011, 10:13 AM

As I was driving in this morning, I felt compelled to write this. It was my hope to make people feel better. I didn't realize until afterward that the beginning sounds like an infomercial, haha. Oh well. I am not a poet.

acchickpea · #4 July 14th, 2011, 10:14 AM

Thanks for sharing!

melissalaw · #5 July 14th, 2011, 11:02 AM

Wow you wrote a beautiful poem. Thanks for sharing.

missy123 · #6 July 14th, 2011, 12:20 PM

That is awesome Courtney. If I was you I would ask Jess to post it permanently in the loss room.

Ya know, even though I am pregnant I still struggle with the losses and years of infertility. Thank you for writing that.

I hope all is well with you. You have been so quiet lately and it has me concerned. Much love to you.

cheeky_monkey · #7 July 14th, 2011, 12:49 PM

Wow you managed to nail down all my questions! Thanks for sharing this. It makes me feel less alone

luvmykids623 · #8 July 14th, 2011, 01:19 PM

You're so awesome, Courtney! Thank you for that!

nala139 · #9 July 14th, 2011, 02:31 PM

That is beautiful and all of the things I need to remind myself of on a daily basis

.

terajet · #10 July 14th, 2011, 05:17 PM

Thanks Courtney. After a loss just last night I really needed to read this. I am sure it will make alot of ladies here feel much better.

You Are Awesome!

KeepingFaith · #11 July 14th, 2011, 05:22 PM

very well said Courtney, thanks for sharing

Cait&AngelAbove · #12 July 14th, 2011, 05:43 PM

I needed that! Thanks!

Shadeauxe · #13 July 14th, 2011, 05:58 PM

Glad everyone liked it!

@Missy I am here lurking most of the time. I am just busy at work and also trying not to obsess so much about everything. It's exhausting to think about TTC non-stop.