So frustrating, tired of being hopeful (PG men. M/C men.)

Magicaledelishus · #1 July 15th, 2011, 04:07 PM

Brief reminder of whats been going on:

About 2 1/2 weeks ago, I had some spotting. I was supposed to be able 8w pregnant, I have had 4 m/c and 1 live birth. I knew the spotting wasn't okay, I just knew something was up. I went in for an U/S and there was a yolk sac, a normal gestational sac, and a fetal pole. No HB. But they said I could be wrong with my dates, etc, I just didn't see how that would be possible. I got my BFP on 8 DPO. I just couldn't be wrong.
So then they said come back in 5 days and we'll see what's changed.
I started prometrium (progesterone) as a blind precaution by my OB. We didn't do labs or anything. I was feeling super negative and my OB was trying to be positive. At the next scan (7/5) nothing had changed. At all. So I figured, okay, now it's over.
My OB told me I could wait a week or two to miscarry naturally, start Cytotec, OR a D&C. I chose natural.
Well nothing happened. 2 weeks later, I went into the ER because I had felt terrible all day and I was worried I was getting an infection. My symptoms are so strong and I had been so sick so I was also dehydrated. They gave me IV fluids and Zofran and did a quantative HCG test and various other things. I had an U/S too. The baby GREW to about 8w1d but no heartbeat. Wth?? So I was like thinking, either way, the baby is dead now because there's no HB.

So here we are now:
I call my OB the next day and ask for them to fill Cytotec. They call back and said after reviewing the U/S report they don't want to start anything until there's another U/S next Thursday @ 12 to confirm for sure. I don't know what to think-- I don't think there's hope. I haven't bled or cramped or anything and I have tons of symptoms but that's because my HCG is 67,000. Which is consistant with about 10w which is where I am now. I'll be 11 weeks almost next week and I just don't know what to think. I needed to vent. This has been the most stressful "loss" yet and I hate it being dragged out. Of course, yes, it'd be crazy to go into the US next week and see more growth and a heartbeat, but I just don't feel like that'll happen.
Sigh.

melissalaw · #2 July 15th, 2011, 05:36 PM

So sorry you are going through this. Sounds to me like there is still some hope. Maybe you'll get some good news when you go in for U/S next week. I know the not knowing is so hard. You want to know so you can either be happy for start to morn and begin to heal. We're here for us if you need us. Update us after your us next week.

sandiegomom · #3 July 15th, 2011, 08:27 PM

oh, i am so sorry you are going for this. I can't even imagine the emotional roller coaster you are going through. I think it would be soooo hard to be in limbo like this. Afraid to be hopeful, only to be let down. But I think this would be an amazing, amazing, story if things turned around. But I can see needing closure if that isn't the case. Either way, I will keep you in my thoughts...(and prayers, if you would like.) We are all here for you.

TnPhotoMama81 · #4 July 15th, 2011, 10:41 PM

wow I can't imagine going through all that....

T&P's I am so sorry...I hope everything will be ok but I know it would be hard to hold onto positive thoughts.

luvmykids623 · #5 July 16th, 2011, 07:05 AM

I'm sorry you're going through this! I went through something similar last summer. I wound up needing a D&C at 11w, because my body just wasn't understanding that something was wrong. My OB told DH after the procedure that it was a good thing that I went for the D&C, because there was no indication that my body was going to give up any time soon.

Giant ((((((((((((((((((HUGS)))))))))))))))))))))) to you! I hope you defy the odds and wind up with good news!

momoftwinsand1 · #6 July 16th, 2011, 09:30 AM

I just went through something similiar. I was told at 8 weeks I was miscarrying. I chose to go natural after about 2 weeks nothing. they did bloodwork and my numbers were like 167,000, I would of been 10 weeks by then so the numbers were right where they shuld be. They did another US but there was no heartbeat. The baby was measuring 9 weeks. I waited another week and another blood draw and my numbers went up again to 170,000. I just had a d&c on wednesday. I couldnt take it anymore. Im so sorry you are going throught this I know how hard and emotional it is.