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Dear everyone,

I need some advice or help. My boyfriend and I were younger and didn't know each other well in November 2009. That was when I decided to have an abortion because I was in school and scared and it was unplanned. I felt guilty for it ever since and wish I never did it. He wanted it and I feel terrible still.

Anyway, we are still together and closer now. I stopped my birth control in March of this year because we decided to try. Well this month I really got my hopes up and started taking prenatal vitamins and charting when I would ovulate. So, according to the calendar we used the dates it said. Then I took a pregnancy test when it said to since I didn't initially get a period only some spotting. I had two positive tests. The second line was lighter but I read that the second line could be so. So I told him and we were so happy and planned everything. I had cravings and my breasts were even super sore. I felt so close and happy. He would touch my stomach and kiss it. Now, yesterday I started bleeding more and I took another test still. The test intially looked negative but its a very faint positive really close. I haven't stopped crying since. I even made a doctor appointment when I got the positives and we began to plan our lives out...

Now, we are devastated. I don't even know what to do or think. I wish I would have never taken the tests and I would have never gotten our hopes up. Now I have a "period," well I guess it is, during the time I should be ovulating? I don't believe in those ovulation charts. I think the only way is to at least have sex every other day. I know I probably just have to suffer the devastation and try again, but it is so hard. How will we ever take a test again knowing we had positives and this happened?

Any advice? Thank you so much.

[*SamF*]

I'm sorry you are going through this. It sounds like you most likely are miscarrying. How far along do you think you where? Or when was your last period? You should call your doctor though and let them know what is happening. It's best if they can do a blood test to make sure that everything does pass.
Ovulation charting does work, but it doesn't prevent a miscarriage. Nothing really prevents a miscarriage.
Loosing that innocence of pregnancy bliss at the first positive test is really hard. But the glimmer of hope and excitement does stick around when you try again.
Please stick around, there is a lot of support on this board to get through this type of thing. You are not alone. This is not you fault.

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Thank you Sam! It is so hard seeing so many people I know being pregnant right now. I want so badly to be happy for them but I am more so just jealous that it is not me now. My bf still has his hopes up that it could still be true but I just can't wait for the bleeding to stop so we can try again. I'm glad I'm not alone. It is just that I am 23, I feel like it should be easy still being young.

[doremi]

I agree that you should be seen by your doctor. Do you know if you are RH negative? If so, you need a Rhogam shot. I'm very sorry you're going through a m/c. It is so hard!

[melissalaw]

I am so sorry that you are going through this. I agree with the above posts, I would definitely see your doctor. Please know that we are here for you to offer support. A loss is such a difficult thing to go through and am so sorry that it is happening to you.

[pepper73]

I'm so sorry you're going through this. It is a scary and heartbreaking time. I totally agree with the others about calling your doctor. Please keep us posted!

[StaceygirlPa]

I am sorry you are going through this. I agree with the other ladies. You should call you doctor and let them know what is happening. The ladies on this board are amazing.

[tabstock]

Oh wow you ladies really are so nice and made me smile. I am going to try to go on and try more. My bf got so upset he said he was going to quit his job today, and he did. I don't know what to do.

What is RH negative? I have never heard of Rhogram?

Though I did have to take estrogen pills before because I had a very long menstrual period and I remember the nurse said something about I have few fat blood cells. I don't know if that makes sense but that's what I remember her saying.

[*SamF*]

RH negative is part of your blood type. Like O+ or O-. If you are negative you can have a reaction to the blood of the miscarriage. Rhogram treats that.

Why would your BF quit his job? It will make things harder, especially with you wanting to try again if he is unemployed!

[.:Shortcake:.]

Originally Posted by *SamF*

I'm sorry you are going through this. It sounds like you most likely are miscarrying. How far along do you think you where? Or when was your last period? You should call your doctor though and let them know what is happening. It's best if they can do a blood test to make sure that everything does pass.
Ovulation charting does work, but it doesn't prevent a miscarriage. Nothing really prevents a miscarriage.
Loosing that innocence of pregnancy bliss at the first positive test is really hard. But the glimmer of hope and excitement does stick around when you try again.
Please stick around, there is a lot of support on this board to get through this type of thing. You are not alone. This is not you fault.

Originally Posted by *SamF*

RH negative is part of your blood type. Like O+ or O-. If you are negative you can have a reaction to the blood of the miscarriage. Rhogram treats that.

Why would your BF quit his job? It will make things harder, especially with you wanting to try again if he is unemployed!

I agree with Sam. ((HUGS)) I am very sorry for your loss. It really is best to call your doctor.

[sweet.hun]

First off I'm so sorry you are going through what sounds like a miscarriage. You should go to the dr to confirm this however.

Also, I wanted to let you know the Pregnancy Loss forum has a wonderful group of supportive ladies who can help you through this, along with an abortion forum as well.

[lindsey2000k]

I am so sorry for your loss.