I was wrong

*SamF* · #1 August 16th, 2011, 05:34 PM

I actually thought DH got what this whole TTCAL/TTCMA was like for me. But apparently I'm just bitter because I really don't want to hear about the cute pregnancy shirt our neighbor was wearing.
I really thought he understood.

missy123 · #2 August 16th, 2011, 06:04 PM

Sam - just like they never fully understand our losses, they never fully understand what we go through with infertility. As sensitive and in tune with my feelings my husband can be he admits that he will never "get it". ((hugs))

.:Shortcake:. · #3 August 16th, 2011, 06:21 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by missy123

Sam - just like they never fully understand our losses, they never fully understand what we go through with infertility. As sensitive and in tune with my feelings my husband can be he admits that he will never "get it". ((hugs))

Ditto! With us it's different then men. ((HUGS))

lindsey2000k · #4 August 16th, 2011, 06:41 PM

Ditto the ladies above!

melissalaw · #5 August 16th, 2011, 06:57 PM

Sam I'm sorry that DH doesn't get it. I understand what you mean. they don't understand what we go through.

StaceygirlPa · #6 August 16th, 2011, 07:10 PM

Ditto to what Missy and Katie said. Hugs.

pepper73 · #7 August 17th, 2011, 02:43 AM

Oh geez..I'm sorry. I agree with the others. They really don't get it. They try and to some extent they understand...but not fully and they never will. It is so much different for us.

.:Shortcake:. · #8 August 17th, 2011, 03:07 AM

Sometimes if I sit DH down and explain how I feel he does truly get it... other times he still doesn't.

3Sapphires · #9 August 17th, 2011, 04:18 AM

ditto, the men never will fully get it. Although I have trained my DH to just shut the H*** up, he never points out babies, or preggos, or talks about them in anyway.

luvmykids623 · #10 August 17th, 2011, 04:47 AM

I'm sorry Sam. I agree they'll never fully get it. Great big hugs to you.

cheeky_monkey · #11 August 17th, 2011, 04:58 AM

Ditto to what the others have said!

At times it makes me want to strangle for being so darn ignoramus about it all. He simply does not get it that it only makes me feel sooo down when he says that one of his friends' wives would be preggo. But on the other hand - pls don't kill me!! - at times it is a blessing that he does not get it. I mean if he were to let all this getting preggo/ttc'ing in vain, etc...... would be be there to keep on pushing and not to lose hope? (apart from all of you guys here obviously)

Cait&AngelAbove · #12 August 17th, 2011, 05:32 AM

I am sorry that he said that to you. Men just do not understand what we go through. DH will say ah look how cute that baby is and I just wanna cry.

Shadeauxe · #13 August 17th, 2011, 05:50 AM

Sorry he bummed you out.

I can't say I understand any of the emotional stuff either, but my brain isn't wired that way. I do at least have the sense to know that someone IS bothered by something even if I don't understand the psychology of it. Just tell him it hurt your feelings and he probably won't do it again. it's never intentional.

joanna26 · #14 August 17th, 2011, 06:23 AM

Big HUGS! Ditto to the ladies above. DH tries, he really does, but he simply does not get how hard TTC is for me at this point. That is why we have each other here

missy123 · #15 August 17th, 2011, 06:28 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Shadeauxe

Sorry he bummed you out.

I can't say I understand any of the emotional stuff either, but my brain isn't wired that way. I do at least have the sense to know that someone IS bothered by something even if I don't understand the psychology of it. Just tell him it hurt your feelings and he probably won't do it again. it's never intentional.

Sometimes I really wish my brain was like yours Courtney. I am so emotional and actually feel others pain at times. I am not a bag of mush - I was made extremely independent and strong (almost to a fault) but at the same time so dang emotional. It even drives me crazy at times.

Shadeauxe · #16 August 17th, 2011, 06:56 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by missy123

Sometimes I really wish my brain was like yours Courtney. I am so emotional and actually feel others pain at times. I am not a bag of mush - I was made extremely independent and strong (almost to a fault) but at the same time so dang emotional. It even drives me crazy at times.

I'm not saying that I'm not awesome, because I totally am

, but it's difficult being the way I am as well. Yes, I can handle difficult situations well, but when other people I care about are suffering, I don't have the right words to comfort them because I don't go through it the same way. The best I can ever come up with is "Sorry" which is so lame.

.:Shortcake:. · #17 August 17th, 2011, 07:15 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Shadeauxe

I'm not saying that I'm not awesome, because I totally am

, but it's difficult being the way I am as well. Yes, I can handle difficult situations well, but when other people I care about are suffering, I don't have the right words to comfort them because I don't go through it the same way. The best I can ever come up with is "Sorry" which is so lame.

Honestly sometimes "sorry" is the best thing to hear. Sometimes others try to say things and it comes out so wrong and ends up hurting more

*SamF* · #18 August 17th, 2011, 07:37 AM

Thanks ladies! He came back in a little later and just gave me a hug. He said he is convinced that we will get pregnant soon, if not this cycle then at least by next year. He also forgets that I', pumping mass quantities of hormones through my body at the moment.