D&E yesterday, may I join?

humnck · #1 August 20th, 2011, 08:42 AM

Hi ladies, my name is Cary and I am 30 (31 at the end of the month). I have 1 DD who I conceived after a loss. I have just had a D&E yesterday, would have been 12 weeks today. We had seen a hb at 8w3d, after an u/s on Thursday, we found out that the baby had stopped growing just 3 days after that u/s at 8w 6d. It has been so hard, harder than the first, but we know things will start to get better over time. My doctor told me that she isn't sure this is necessarily a recurring thing and they didn't do genetic testing because she really thinks, at this point, that it was "bad luck". It doesn't make it any better, knowing that there may have been something wrong with that baby. I keep seeing the u/s with the hb and then seeing the one the other day where there was no movement at all, it just saddens me that I didn't know something was wrong before then, not that there was something I could do, but we announced it all over the place, and I was already pulling out my maternity clothes. DH has been so supportive, as well as all of our family and friends. But, I need to talk to others that are going through the same thing!

DH and I have decided that once I get the ok from the doc that I have healed (hopefully at the f/u in a couple of weeks), we will start TTC.

Thanks for listening!

EJsMommy · #2 August 20th, 2011, 10:27 AM

Hi and welcome! I a m sorry for your loss. It is certainly hard to not know why it ended. The ladies here are very supportive and you can post anything here and we will support you in any way we can. Hugs

BeckyBozeman · #3 August 20th, 2011, 10:31 AM

Hi Cary,

I'm so sorry for your loss but glad you found your way here. I'm a newish member and the ladies have been great! It really is nice to be able to talk/vent to others that have been in a similar boat.

My name is Becky (36), DB is Adam (35)... I had a very similar experience to yours - I m/c at just over 11 weeks, but baby stopped growing at about 8 weeks. We heard the h/b at an early u/s at 6.5 weeks and didn't know anything was wrong until I started bleeding. I've just finished my first AF after the m/c and we're jumping right back into TTC. It was the first pregnancy for both of us and we were so excited and then so devastated. It's pretty safe to say that it's the hardest thing I've ever been through, made more so by the fact that so many don't really recognize how much of a loss it is. Between these boards and the support group I found at our local hospital I've had a lot of opportunity to talk about things and it's helped tremendously!

So sorry again that you're going through this. I hope your body recovers soon and you're able to get your BFP that sticks like crazy!!

Ana*Addey*OliveMommy · #4 August 20th, 2011, 12:47 PM

So sorry for your loss

Cait&AngelAbove · #5 August 20th, 2011, 01:05 PM

I am so sorry for your loss!!!

Hopefulpinkangel · #6 August 20th, 2011, 01:23 PM

So sorry for your loss.

*SamF* · #7 August 20th, 2011, 06:27 PM

So sorry for your loss! Welcome to the board, we have a great group of ladies here.

.:Shortcake:. · #8 August 21st, 2011, 05:07 AM

Hi Cary, welcome to TTC after Loss. I am so sorry you have to be here and are going through this. We are here for you. The ladies here are amazing and so supportive. If you need anything please feel free to PM me. I hope you get to ok to try soon and your BFP is right around the corner. ((HUGS))

humnck · #9 August 21st, 2011, 06:13 AM

Thank you so much, ladies! It means a lot to have such a great support group. My DH has been very supportive and he is going through it too, but his body doesn't have to, so it is hard for him to really understand completely. I wish the best for everyone here! Thanks again and look forward to getting to know you during this hard time!

pepper73 · #10 August 21st, 2011, 07:47 AM

Hi and welcome!! I'm so sorry for your losses. I hope that you are able to heal quickly, both physically and emotionally and wish you the best of luck TTC. This board is amazing and full of support!

lindsey2000k · #11 August 21st, 2011, 05:55 PM

I am so sorry for your losses.

I would ask for testing to be done. I would not take the "just bad luck". I had a miscarriage, had DD then had another miscarriage at which time I was told bad luck. 2 miscarriages later they finally ran testing on me and found out I have MTHFR a blood clotting disorder.
The main reason they pushed me off was they said I already had a child so chances are nothing is wrong. So dont let them tell you that.

Once again I am so sorry for your losses. I hope you get pregnant quick and have a healty 9 months.

humnck · #12 August 21st, 2011, 07:07 PM

Lindsey, thanks for the advice, I have been thinking of calling my doc and discussing with her. I have to wait another week, however, because she is now on vacation - always waiting for something right?! I will discuss with her.

lindsey2000k · #13 August 22nd, 2011, 05:11 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by humnck

Lindsey, thanks for the advice, I have been thinking of calling my doc and discussing with her. I have to wait another week, however, because she is now on vacation - always waiting for something right?! I will discuss with her.

Good luck and I hope they do the testing for you. I would hate to see you suffer another loss before finding out. Sometimes they like to wait until your beta's are back to normal before they test so you may have had to wait it out anyway.

I am so sorry again.

joanna26 · #14 August 22nd, 2011, 06:11 AM

I am so sorry for your loss, but welcome to the board

KaiyaRae'sMomma · #15 August 22nd, 2011, 06:18 AM

Welcome to the board. I wish no one had to be here, but you will find it is a great group for anyone who needs it! Sorry to hear about your loss. My loss is much different than most of the ladies in here, but I have found comfort and support here just the same!