[kaylakay]

I hate gender dissapointment more than anything! Just be grateful your have a healthy baby! Why does it matter? A new nurse at my work just got hired... I asked sweetly what she was having (she obviously was pregnant) she said "A boy... But I just really wanted a girl. I haven't quite gotten over it. I never wanted to raise boys" I was furious! I just wanted to say "Well... I've had 3 consecutive losses... No live children... And I have no idea whether I'll be able to carry my own child. Want to change places?"

Boy or girl it doesn't matter! They are a miracle!

I see it all over JM.... it's hard not to say something but I won't... But tempting.

Rant over haha

[3Sapphires]

*hugs*

I'm sorry, but I have experienced gender disappointment - I don't like to admit it, but it does happen

[Leanne78]

Kayla - totally understand what you are saying. I would have had a really hard time not coming back with a smart comment for that girl.

[.:Shortcake:.]

I understand if you have a boy and your pregnant again wanting a little girl but to be at the point of some of these people I agree it's ridiculous! I bite my tongue often.

[EJsMommy]

That is ridiculous! Be happy for what you are given as it is all a great miracle. For me boy or girl is not important - just healthy baby.

[missy123]

you should have totally said that to her.... Uggggggggg........


I admit I had gender disappointment with my youngest son but it lasted 2 hours max. I love my boys!!

[pepper73]

I can understand that if you already have a boy, you might want a girl...but, I can't imagine being bitter and resentful like that. Every child is a miracle and a blessing. I know my BF really wants us to have a boy but he certainly won't be upset if we have a girl. For me, since I have no children, I don't care. I just want my healthy little rainbow baby. Heck...I want twins, but I'm definitely not going to have a fit if I end up with one!
If I were you, I might let the girl know that you have had losses. I'm not saying that you should bring it up in a defensive or confrontational way, but just in a way that she is aware. Who knows...maybe she has also gone through a loss and has forgotten how it feels. Or she may know a close friend or family member who has gone through that. It might make her stop and think about how precious her little boy is.

[3Sapphires]

she may still be "grieving the loss of her girl"

I know it did happen to me, I was so set on having a girl, I never imagined I would have a boy first, and then another boy. It took me a little time to get over not having the girl that I knew I would have.

Not that I don't love my boys more than anything, and I would be so grateful for any baby rather than no baby, but I am sure if I found out I was having another boy, I would probably mourn the loss of the baby girl that I would never have.

I certainly hope she isn't resentful that she is going to be blessed with an awesome baby boy, because that isn't right

[Shadeauxe]

I think it's prefectly fine to have gender disappointment. As long as it doesn't affect how they treat the child, then who cares. Sometimes life is about learning lessons like, what you want is not always what you need. People may want something and then end up pleasantly surprised about how great it can be when you don't get what you want.

I was convinced I was having a girl and was a little disappointed that I was going to have a boy. Ultimately all I cared about was a healthy baby, but I still thought I wanted a girl. My son is awesome and now I think I was stupid to think I wanted a girl more than a boy. Lesson learned.

[*SamF*]

Although it s hard for those of us who would take either gender, gender disappointment is very real. The feelings for these women are very real. Many times they have to grieve the son/daughter they had in their mind, before they can celebrate the baby they are having. I honestly know I will have at least a brief episode if our next baby is a boy, because I have always dreamed of having a daughter. I'll be happy and love the little boy as much as a girl, but will also grieve for what I don't have.

[MeganMomof5]

as someone who had 3 losses I admit I had gender disappointment with this pregnancy...I always hated hearing of others who had gender disappointment and said I would just be happy with any baby...Which is still true...When I was told my baby was a boy I actually started to cry a little to myself...I was very happy to hear he was healthy...I had a later loss and it was a girl, and I was so excited for her, and dreamt about having a baby girl...after I lost her the whole time I was ttcal I wanted a baby girl, I even went shopping and bought baby girl things...This is my last baby, so I think I was morning the fact that I'll never have a girl...I wasn't trying to replace her, but I think it would of filled some of the void of losing my baby girl if I were to have another girl...Now 4 months later, I'm fine with having a baby boy, I love him just the same as I love my other kids, and I wouldn't trade him for a girl if I had a choice...So any way I just wanted to give a different point of view...It makes me sad to see people actually angry over the gender of their child, but I now feel for some people with gender disappointment....This was the first time I had ever experienced it, and even though it didn't last long, and I wasn't mad, just sad, it's something you just can't help sometimes.