New here maybe?

vrock · #1 October 25th, 2011, 12:39 PM

Hi Ladies, My name is Valerie, I am not completely on the TTC train again but I just recently had my first miscarriage and am still in the process of waiting for my numbers to get back to 0. It has been 11 days and they were still going up but very slowly and finally just started dropping the past 4 days but have only dropped 10 so far. My bleeding has completely stopped though and I feel much more normal so I am hoping that my numbers will start dropping much quicker now.

I guess my question is for you ladies on your experiences with TTCAL. My midwife told me to wait at least 3 full cycles not counting the miscarriage so that would be in February. She said that the risk of miscarriage is higher is you get pregnant right away after a loss.

February seems so far away, but at the same time I am very scared to TTC again. My last pregnancy ended up with me almost losing my daughter because a blood vessel ruptures in the umbilical cord and then just when I felt good about my body and we got decided to get pregnant again I lost this baby. If we do decide to try again I don't want to try to early and mess things up again. KWIM?

Zoey1981 · #2 October 25th, 2011, 02:02 PM

Hi Vrock.
I saw you in the June2012 DDC. Sorry to see you here as well. I am also waiting for my numbers to drop although I have had no bleeding or cramping yet. I think it depends on your doctor. My first doctor told me if my m/c had been "normal" then i could have started TTC again right away but because I had to have a suction d&c i had to wait 3 months. My brother's GF had a m/c and they told her she could start right away and she got pg right away again and they now have a daughter who will be 1 on Nov. 4th.

You need to do what you feel is comfortable for you I think. But I really am no expert in this. Checking on the american pregnancy website they suggest waiting 2-3 "normal" menstral cycles as well. Tbh when my numbers go back down to normal we will continue to TTC and pray for the best.

junie22 · #3 October 25th, 2011, 04:28 PM

Hi, Valerie. We were both in the June DDC for a short time... or maybe you joined just as I was leaving. I'm so sorry to hear about your m/c.

I'm glad you've found your way to this board, though, and I do hope you want to try again, when you're emotionally and physically ready.

I've definitely heard the "wait 3 months" advice for others. My m/c was very early in my pregnancy (4 weeks, 4 days), my hCG remained low the whole time, and I had a natural m/c. I suppose it was more like a "chemical pregnancy" because it was so early. I just hate that term, though.

Since my hCG returned to zero quickly, it was so early, and the m/c was natural, we decided to try again right away. Time will tell if that was a bad decision or not.

Whatever you decide, I hope that your next little bean is super-sticky.

MillerMom2b · #4 October 25th, 2011, 05:03 PM

Sorry for your loss... after my D&C my midwife told me 3 months but the surgeon told me only 1. We ended up waiting 6 months, anyway. I personally needed to wait so I could move on emotionally......I would wait the three months if that's what they told you.. but only you can make that decision. Good Luck, I hope you get your sticky bean soon

humnck · #5 October 25th, 2011, 05:50 PM

Hi, again I am ss for your loss. When I had both of my losses, one in August and one in April '08, my doc said at least two. They really want you to be emotionally ready and a lot of it is for dating. However, my numbers have dropped fairly quickly (even with a 12 week loss) and after the loss in April, we started as soon as I had my first AF and we have a now healthy 2.5 year old. We waited the same amount of time this time too and, too am hoping it wasn't a bad decision, but as Junie said, only time will tell. Allow yourself at least time to heal emotionally. For some, the healing is faster and the only thing that will help is a pg, for others, they need longer - it's all a personal choice. GL and I hope your numbers drop faster now and that you get your rainbow baby soon!

joanna26 · #6 October 25th, 2011, 06:02 PM

I'm so sorry for your loss sweetie

I had a D&C at 9.5 weeks for a missed m/c and my OB only recommended that we wait until I had a normal AF to start TTC again. I have heard doctors recommend waiting longer for later term losses though. HUGS!!

vrock · #7 October 25th, 2011, 08:19 PM

Thanks everyone. The more I think about it, this pregnancy was a "If it happens, it happens" pregnancy and now the loss made me realize how much I really do want another baby.

I think I will probably wait a while more for my emotional healing. I have been blogging and that helps a lot and I am praying that we will just know when we are ready.
Thanks for all the advice!

ninja_mommy · #8 October 25th, 2011, 08:35 PM

sorry for your loss. I just m/c 2 weeks ago at 6 1/2 weeks. OB just said today to wait two cycles. We have decided that I will see when and what next AF is like and then go from there. If things don't seem right we might wait one more cycle. But if it's typical AF and doesn't hurt a lot then I think we will try next cycle. I think you need to listen to your body and what feels right for you.

pepper73 · #9 October 25th, 2011, 10:25 PM

I'm so sorry for your loss!! For me, my doctor advised me to wait 3 cycles but I ignored that. I waited until I had my first AF and then started trying. I really think it depends more on your emotional well-being than anything else...unless your doctor gives you a specific medical reason to wait.

*SamF* · #10 October 26th, 2011, 07:24 AM

Welcome to the board, and I'm so sorry for your loss.

I've heard the 3 months thing too. I also have gotten pregnant the cycle after a m/c, it was a loss but not due to timing.
I think it all depends on how far along you were and if you m/c naturally or had a D&C. I'd wait till you were comfortable with TTC again.

Glad you decided to join us, this is a great group of ladies!

acchickpea · #11 October 26th, 2011, 09:24 AM

Sorry for your loss but welcome to this board... After my loss I was told to wait 2 to 3 months... He said it was more emotionally for me. He actually out me on Birth control pills to try to help regulate my cycles... (I feel like I wasted two month while on the pill.....) I think if you start a cycle and feel up to it then start TTC...

vrock · #12 October 26th, 2011, 12:15 PM

Thanks everyone. I was 6 weeks when I miscarried and it was a slow but natural miscarriage. I finally passed everything a week after the bleeding started and the bleeding stopped completely this past Sunday which 10 days since the bleeding started. On Monday my numbers were still 262 and I have to go back next Monday and am praying they are dropping fast.

Weird thing- My CM looks almost like what I get right before my EWCM starts, the bleeding just stopped on Sunday. Anyone have this after a miscarriage?

junie22 · #13 October 26th, 2011, 12:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by vrock

Weird thing- My CM looks almost like what I get right before my EWCM starts, the bleeding just stopped on Sunday. Anyone have this after a miscarriage?

I miscarried earlier than you, and I still noticed very different CM right after the bleeding stopped. In fact, this whole post-m/c cycle has had a lot more CM than I'm used to. The doctor said that's completely normal. And some other girls I've talked to said that they had a lot more CM the cycle after their m/c. Hope your body regulates very soon.

vrock · #14 October 26th, 2011, 07:56 PM

Thanks Adrienne. I just thought it was very strange like my body was getting ready to ovulate again already or something.

junie22 · #15 October 26th, 2011, 08:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by vrock

Thanks Adrienne. I just thought it was very strange like my body was getting ready to ovulate again already or something.

It very well could be getting ready to ovulate again. While not advised because your uterus needs time to heal, plenty of women do get pregnant the very next cycle after a m/c. You might use some OPKs just to be sure.

.:Shortcake:. · #16 October 27th, 2011, 05:13 AM

I am so very sorry for your loss. As far as how long to wait most doctors say wait one cycle for dating purposes. But really when to try again is up to you. If your body isn't ready it won't get pregnant. There are lots of ladies who try right away and don't even wait one cycle and now have healthy babies, there are some who try and don't get pregnant at all. Just make sure you are emotionally ready as well as physically. We are here for you hun.