Forum: Trying to Conceive after Loss
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October 27th, 2011, 06:27 PM
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Mega Super Mommy
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Join Date: Jun 2008
Posts: 3,961
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That I really need to stop checking in on my old DDC board. Every time I do it just makes me down in the dumps. I am really happy for those girls and it is a great DDC but I am so sad that my baby isn't still growing. Everyone is getting their first u/s which is really hard to see. I need to force myself to just not click on that board for a while. Although I do want to watch all of them continue on in their pregnancies. Oh well, I guess this is just another thing that goes along with a loss.
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Thanks Rachel for the awesome siggy!
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October 27th, 2011, 06:53 PM
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~Praying4Girl&LoveMyBoys~
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Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: Washington State
Posts: 256
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I am right there with you! I wen to it yesterday and although I am happy for them it just made me really sad! So I am too staying away from it.
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October 27th, 2011, 06:54 PM
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Expecting #1
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Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: California
Posts: 7,997
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I check in on the June DDC, too. I had to take a break for a couple of weeks after my m/c, but I log in from time to time now... mainly to check on a couple of the girls that were really awesome when we were in the 2WW together. It's probably not a bad idea for you to take some time away from it. When you're ready, they'll still be there.
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October 27th, 2011, 07:08 PM
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Loving my babies. :)
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Join Date: Nov 2008
Posts: 7,458
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I stopped looking at my ddc about a week after the bleeding started...i knew it was over...and i get insanely jealous of pregnant people..so i wouldn't be able to deal with it.
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Angel babies: 9/2011 (5w) & 2/2012 (11w)
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October 27th, 2011, 07:11 PM
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Platinum Supermommy
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Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: the mountain state
Posts: 9,451
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I used to check on mine too. Time will help you be able to stop poking in as often. I often think about the Jan 2011 PR, but I haven't stopped in there in a few months.
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October 27th, 2011, 07:22 PM
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Super Mommy
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Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: FLA USA
Posts: 714
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I know how you feel. I miss the girls in my DDC so much. I checked in on them yesterday, but have stopped myself today.
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October 27th, 2011, 08:14 PM
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Platinum Supermommy
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Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: IL
Posts: 5,019
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I had to stop checking too. I would pop in here or there just from habit, but it just hurts me to go in and lurk
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October 28th, 2011, 03:45 AM
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Platinum Supermommy
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Join Date: May 2009
Location: Pennsylvania
Posts: 14,553
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After my first loss I was the same way. Now I don't because honestly it just hurt way to much and was not healthy for me to continue putting myself through that.  maybe if you take some time away from that board you will be over to go back with less hurt on yourself.
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October 28th, 2011, 04:20 AM
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Mega Super Mommy
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Join Date: Feb 2011
Location: Maine
Posts: 3,189
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I'm so sorry!  I can imagine it's a tough reminder. If it hurts too much then time away is probably a good thing. The women there know you care and that you are happy for them. It's important to do what's best for you.
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October 28th, 2011, 06:41 AM
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Mega Super Mommy
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Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Dallas, TX
Posts: 3,800
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I never went back to my old DDC after I made a goodbye post. Just too painful. HUGS sweetie!
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October 28th, 2011, 07:32 AM
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Mega Super Mommy
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Join Date: May 2009
Location: new jersey
Posts: 2,142
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I stopped as well.... It wasn't helping me try to cope with the loss....
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October 28th, 2011, 11:21 AM
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Mega Super Mommy
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Join Date: May 2011
Location: Montana
Posts: 2,078
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I still lurk on the Jan 12 DDC... I was there for quite a while before my loss and became interested in them and want to see them all get their babies. I did have to take a break for a little while right after my loss because it hurt too much. But now I enjoy seeing what's happening with them, where they are... It's a little bittersweet because I should be 27 weeks along with my first baby right now. Instead I'm 20 weeks behind with this new little cootie...
I agree with the ladies above that said you need to do what works best for you. I for one can't wait to hear the update that you've gotten another BFP and that it's sticking! And that goes for all of you that had to leave...
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October 28th, 2011, 12:45 PM
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Mega Super Mommy
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Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: Delaware (the state!)
Posts: 4,504
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 to Becky's sentiment! I hope you get your BFP quickly and have your rainbow baby!
Please don't think that we don't think you are happy for us, many of us on that board know how hard it is, I lurked in the March '12 board a couple of times and had to stop myself, because they were all getting the 20 week anatomy scans and finding out what they were having and talking about movement, etc...it was hard to see. I am happy for everyone, but after a loss it is so hard to hear happy news from those same people you thought you would be.
HUGS!!
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October 28th, 2011, 02:01 PM
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Wife/Mommy/Photographer
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Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Oneida, TN
Posts: 7,313
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I totally understand that. With my first loss I would read the DDC every day...several times a day like I was still a "member" there. I had a hard time letting go...but glad I finally did.
With the second loss I checked in once or twice but that was it.
It really is like torturing yourself in a way...even though you are still happy for everyone else.
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October 28th, 2011, 06:33 PM
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Expecting #1
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Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: California
Posts: 7,997
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Valerie, I saw your new siggy in the Siggy Pick-up. It's really neat.
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October 28th, 2011, 07:26 PM
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Mega Super Mommy
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Join Date: Jun 2008
Posts: 3,961
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Oh Good thanks for letting me know!
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Thanks Rachel for the awesome siggy!
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