[cdukes2010]

New news on the happenings of my crazy body that has a mind of its own. Went in for labs on Friday morning to check HCG levels. They were 52.5 on Monday (12/5). Today the nurse called and said Friday's lab read 56. Clearly it wasn't enough of an increase to indicate another pregnancy so I have to go in for an exam and ultrasound tomorrow so they can see what the heck is going on in there. It's odd that it would be rising almost 8 weeks post m/c. So it looks like I'm headed for D&C all these weeks later. I don't suspect infection but I'm freaked out that my numbers are rising when I should be on my way to AF and starting over. The last thing I want to do is spend my Christmas reliving this whole ordeal but it seems that's going to be the case.

Update 12/13/11

I went in today, the ultrasound did show products of conception still hanging around. The doctor came in to discuss our options, the OR for the D&C where I would be put under or something called a menstrual aspiration. I asked which would be more cost effective since my insurance is giving me such a hard time over this and she said menstrual aspiration since I'd be awake for the whole procedure. She basically described it as a "mini D&C" since almost everything else had made its way out on its own.

Warning, I'm going to go into detail so if you don't want to read on please don't... I know it can be hard to read about other experiences after your own loss.

So I laid back and she warned me that I was going to feel a little pinch. I have a pretty high pain tolerance but this pain was unlike anything I have ever experienced in my life. She gave me the shots internally, I believe they were all in my cervix. I felt the needle 4 times as she used the Lidocaine. I literally felt everything. The pain and cramping was unbearable. I don't know if the Lidocaine did anything or not because I felt all of it. DH was there by my side and I'm pretty sure I nearly broke his hand squeezing so hard. My ears started to ring and my face went numb from the injections and the nurse just kept reminding me to breath. The tears just came at that point. I couldn't look at DH because I know it was hard for him to see me like that too. I'm always the tough girl, I put on a happy face for others but I couldn't pretend today. After she was done my whole body just shook and I felt like I was going to pass out. But the good news is it's over. It's FINALLY over.

The Dr. told us to wait until after my next AF to actively start trying again. She said it could be pretty heavy and uncomfortable the first go around. She also said they would send a sample to the lab to test for abnormalities and also something called a molar pregnancy. She thought it was odd my hCG levels would rise after 8 weeks so that's why they are checking on the molar pg. Apparently a molar pregnancy would have caused the cells to continue growing and multiplying despite there not being an embryo any longer.

I'm just happy to have the physical part of this behind me officially. I finally got some answers and a little closure.

[junie22]

I'm so sorry to hear this.

[JulieMc]

So sorry you're going through this. I went through kind of the same thing, and it sucks. But at least if you do have the d&c, you'll know the end is near and you'll be back on track to TTC again (if you want). The not knowing and the waiting is the hardest.

[seri0uslyc0nfused]

What a mess!!! That would be really frustrating!! I really hope the u/s and apt will bring better news for you and hopefully you won't need a D&C, not a fun Christmas present for sure. T&P are with you, KUP how it goes tomorrow!

[joanna26]

How frustrating I'm so sorry that you are still stuck in limbo sweetie. At least after the D&C you know that this part of your journey is over and you can go back to TTC

[.:Shortcake:.]

how frustrating hun! Praying you get some answers soon!

[Zoey1981]

I had a m/c for two months at the beginning of this year. My levels kept going up and then down and up and down for about 4 weeks. Eventually my body gave it up and went back to normal. No medication or D & C. I had one with my first m/c and although it sucks it was a quick end.

[L-SBB]

ughh i'm so sorry...that's beyond frustrating! I hope with the u/s they can figure out what's going on! I wish you didn't need a D&C after everything you've already been through but I imagine just getting closure finally would be worth even dealing with the D&C. (((HUGS)))

[Lindz253]

You poor thing, I am sorry you are going through this. Keeping you in my prayers that this all ends soon and you can be on your way to try again ASAP!

[cdukes2010]

Updated

[Shadeauxe]

Sorry you had to go through that. It sounds horrible.

[seri0uslyc0nfused]

Holy cow, I'm sorry that had to suck so much. That sounds horrible
I'm happy for you that it is over though, I hope AF doesn't take forever so you can get back on the TTC train.
Get some rest and I hope you feel better soon!!!

[Doodle_Jr.]

I'm so sorry that you had to go through that.

[joanna26]

That sounds like a terrible experience, I am so sorry you had to go through that

[.:Shortcake:.]

Carissa I am so sorry your had to go through all of that. Especially after all you have already been through. I'm praying it's not a molar pregnancy because that is the first thing I thought of when you said your numbers had raised again. Please keep us update and take care of yourself. Relax as much as possible and drink lots of fluids.

[Zoey1981]

I am so sorry you had to go through that. It sounded horrible and my heart breaks for you. At least now its over (physically) and you and DH can move on when you are both ready. /hugs.

[Erin84]

I've had to get Lidocaine shots inside for other reasons. Just after that I was shaking and sweating and in tears, so I can't even begin to imagine what you went through. I'm so glad that's all behind you now and you can start to move forward.

Are you really going to sit this cycle out? Some women do and some women don't -- I'm curious what your plan is.

[terajet]

I would definitely sit out this cycle. I was also worried about a molar pg when you said your numbers were rising. Until it is confirmed otherwise, it is best to follow your doctors advice because a molar pg can be serious.

I went through something similar last summer. If you have questions I may be able to help.

Take care of yourself.

[cdukes2010]

You girls are all amazing, you keep me going when I start to get bogged down in this whole process. I'm feeling better right now, I've been laying on the couch working from home this afternoon. DH promised to bring me some cookies He sure does know the way to my heart haha.

The pain is gone for the most part just some cramps now. Our plan is definitely to wait. The molar pregnancy thing freaks me out a bit and I've read they recommend waiting up to a year after that. It's very rare but just to be safe we are going to wait it out and see what the doctor says. I have a follow up in a month to make sure my hCG drops to zero. I'm hoping we get the results from the tissue sample so we can know what the next step is. If we are all clear we will be back in TTC mode as soon as my first AF rolls around.

I'm not going anywhere though, I'll still be here posting/lurking. I'm not about to leave my new friends just because we have to sit out a bit longer!

[L-SBB]

oh Carissa i'm so sorry you had to go through that (((HUGS))) Hoping now that it's not a molar pregnancy...did they tell you when they'd be able to tell you if it was?

definitely don't go anywhere...i'm hanging out until we can TTC too, and i need company since I can't POAS to entertain myself