First time POAS since BFP

seri0uslyc0nfused · #1 December 13th, 2011, 10:12 AM

Well for the heck of it I decided to start OPKs since I really don't know whats going on. Of course this was the first time POAS since I got my BFP so I pretty much lost it. I was really hoping that my BFP was going to be the last time I ever had to POAS.

I finally stopped bleeding/spotting so I figured I could start focusing back on TTC, but just when I think I'm finally done crying, something else happens and it all comes crashing down. Sucks. Then my DS brings me this little broken Christmas ornament shaped like a present and he tells me there is a baby inside it for me to make me happy. Holy cow, are you kidding me? Poor little guy doesn't get why that made me cry, he thought he was doing something nice, and it was really sweet, just really sad too.

So on top of this being a emotional day already, I agreed to finally go to dinner tonight with my MIL. Not alone, with my DH and DS too, and thank god its at a loud restaurant that hopefully won't allow time to be emotional. I just hope she doesn't bring anything up, I'm not ready for that yet.

I really hate this emotional roller coaster....ugh.

.:Shortcake:. · #2 December 13th, 2011, 10:54 AM

Being emotional after a loss is totally normal. I still have my moments and to be honest it helps to get it out. If your MIL brings it up I would just explain ahead of time to your DH that your not ready to talk about it and if she brings it up he can just tell her now is not the time to discuss it. Or he could call her and tell her about it ahead of time. Don't hold it inside and let it out when you need to. We are here for you every step of the way.

cdukes2010 · #3 December 13th, 2011, 11:54 AM

Being emotional is totally normal! And the POAS again for the first time definitely gave me mixed emotions too.

I agree with what Katie said, why don't you try to address the situation before it gets uncomfortable in the middle of dinner. Just have your DH mention to her that you all aren't really ready to talk about it. The last thing you want is to be mid-chew in your dinner and have her ask you something uncomfortable that you aren't prepared to deal with. I was anxious and worried the first time we saw our familiies too but you'd be surprised at how many people are afraid to mention it.

seri0uslyc0nfused · #4 December 13th, 2011, 12:14 PM

Thanks guys

I already had DH talk to her, so hopefully it will be OK. My only concern is all of a sudden she decided she wanted to make dinner instead of going out, which is kinda weird to me. I think being in public was a lot safer! lol
Hopefully it won't be too bad....

Erin84 · #5 December 13th, 2011, 12:22 PM

I'm glad you got DH to talk to her. With our mc, we had just announced the preg to his family, then she came to visit after we found out it wasn't viable but before the mc happened. DH told her what happened and not to bring it up and we were all fine. I'm so sorry life is coming at you so hard lately. I'm glad you're here and that we can all take care of each other.

seri0uslyc0nfused · #6 December 13th, 2011, 01:58 PM

I am very glad to have this place as a support system from others who understand too. It's needed because its hard not to feel super alone during all of this!

BeckyBozeman · #7 December 13th, 2011, 02:55 PM

Hugs... the ladies have already said what I would... but most especially I'd say to let yourself be emotional. For quite a while after my first loss I would get emotional all the time. I decided that I was going to just let it happen. So I cried at work and at the grocery store. It might make some people uncomfortable to see it, but I needed to honor how I felt. They'll live right through it...