Onward (former m/c's mentioned)...rambles and rants.

doremi · #1 January 16th, 2012, 11:33 PM

Not pregnant this cycle. I'm feeling so frustrated!! We did EVERYTHING right this last cycle and the time before. I think we are going to try for two more cycles (I think that will make it six since our m/c in Sept... I'm starting to lose count), and then I'm planning to have a talk with our OB. I'm almost positive there is nothing wrong with me. I'm ovulating like clockwork, I had an u/s that showed all was normal...I'm a little concerned we could be having sperm issues. I know six cycles isn't that long to be trying and that a year is the "norm" for TTC, but it just feels like we've been doing this for way too long. We started TTC in Oct. 2010, got pregnant with m/c #1 in April 2011, then pregnant with m/c #2 in Sept. 2011. It kills me when DH acts like there definitely has to be something wrong because "We've been trying for a year and a half with no results". Ummm, we got pregnant TWICE!!! It's like those don't even count in his mind. I'm just feeling so helpless, so frustrated. I didn't want my kids this far apart in age. Yes, I'm SO thankful that I have one perfect little boy already, but I've known from the day he was born that he was not meant to be an only child, and now there will be over four years between him and his future sibling. There was six years between my brother and I, and even though we are really close, I always hoped that my own kids would be closer together in age. Sigh. Thanks for listening to my rambling and ranting.

.:Shortcake:. · #2 January 17th, 2012, 06:19 AM

I would go to the doctor and ask for them to do some testing. If nothing else it gives you peace of mind that your doing something.

joanna26 · #3 January 17th, 2012, 06:39 AM

Ditto Katie! I completely understand how you feel and I would suggest getting the testing done now. We waited longer than I wanted to on testing because DH was so certain there was nothing wrong (we got pg with Jack so easily and then got pg again after 10 mths of TTC). Well, testing revealed major MFI that at best mean we might be able to start TTC again in June/July. We were basically just wasting our time for the past 18 months. I so wish we had done testing earlier.

Belita · #4 January 17th, 2012, 07:17 AM

after two losses in a row I'd absolutely request testing.

martilynne · #5 January 17th, 2012, 09:26 AM

I would agree on getting testing done. My OB did tests on me and chromosome tests on both of us after my 2nd loss. Everything came back clear but it was good to know. When we lost our 3rd baby because of an extra chromosome, it was so good to know that it was a freak loss and wasn't because there was something wrong with our chromosomes.

doremi · #6 January 17th, 2012, 09:58 AM

I don't want to do the RPL panel yet. It is expensive, and with both our losses being so early on, our OB really thinks it was probably just a fluke that we had the two m/c's in a row. If I have a third, I will definitely do all the testing. But, we have medical debt just from the m/c's themselves that we are trying to pay off, so I don't want to jump the gun and do unnecessary testing... kwim? I'd feel better about doing it after 6 months of TTC with no results. And part of what makes me hesitate is that we already have one healthy baby... if we hadn't had a successful pregnancy before, I would probably be more aggressive with the testing.

L-SBB · #7 January 17th, 2012, 01:36 PM

HUGS

I understand your frustration...i think i could have written your original post myself except that i don't feel like we've done everything right, but i feel like we're TRYING to do everything right and still not getting anywhere.

Anyway, i hope this cycle is your lucky one...I don't blame you re: cost of RPL bloodwork however as someone who also had "only 2 losses" and a successful pregnancy, but then problems did turn up when they ran the RPL tests, I do think it could be helpful knowledge for you to have. You might consider asking your OB the costs of each of the various panels and then have her run the least expensive of them....I think some are not so expensive but some are terribly expensive (do not let them run karotyping on you unless that's fully covered). At least then you could rule out a few things even if you don't have all of the RPL tests run and you could follow up with the rest of them if (hopefully not!) you ever suffered another loss.

BeckyBozeman · #8 January 17th, 2012, 01:52 PM

I totally understand the frustrations Sarah...

We did bloodwork and HSG and it didn't cost us too much... (granted my OB was great and made sure that it all got coded as diagnostic and medically necessary so my insurance covered 80%, but compared to the costs of the m/c's themselves it was a small cost). We're holding off on any type of chromosomal testing yet because of the cost though. It does make me feel a little better to go into another pregnancy feeling like I know more, but it's still a crap shoot.

Anyway, hugs and I hope that you get that sticky BFP really soon... I'd love to see all of us, but especially all of the ladies that started in the January 2011 DDC with me, get a rainbow baby this year! This is such a hard month and I know we all hoped that we'd be pregnant again by now to make it a little easier.

TnPhotoMama81 · #9 January 17th, 2012, 03:44 PM

I understand how you are feeling. I did not want our children so far apart either.

I am thankful I had the RPL panels done because that is how I found out about my blood clotting disorders. I think that is probably the reasons for my early losses but who knows there could have just been something else wrong. We will never know for sure.

BUT the blood clotting thing can be pretty serious...so it is nice to know about it since I have to be on baby asprin for the rest of my life and can't take birth control pills anymore.

I hope you get some answers soon!

I forget...did you ever try soy? It worked twice for us.

doremi · #10 January 17th, 2012, 11:01 PM

Thanks everyone. No, I haven't tried soy. I will look into the costs of some of the various bloodwork that can be done in a few months. I'm just not quite ready to go there yet. This little voice in the back of my head keeps telling me everything is going to be okay and to just be patient. I know that is silly, but I just have this strong feeling that we'll get pregnant soon, and it will be our rainbow baby. I hope I'm right! If I'm not pregnant in the next 2-3 months, we will look into our testing options.