[Mum2three]

some of u know that in 8 months i have lost my 2 Angels and the most resent one was Feb,15,2007. i wanted to get some advice. we really want to have one more child, and it seems that we wont get our third child.
I recently went to my doctor who by the way is fantastic! and he told me to wait 3 months to try again, as he has put me through many tests from A-Z and he wants the results before we try again.
i really don't mind that..we recently found out what caused our son William to pass away. it was from my gallbladder surgery. man i feel really bad that i had the surgery! i really beat myself up over that.
but my dilemma is IM SO SCARED TO TRY AGAIN! is this normal? does anyone else have the feeling? i have been a emotional wreak from everything, and all that i want is my third baby.
its just tearing me up inside, cause im afraid that i will lose another child. my doctor told me that when i do get pregnant again that he is going to stitch up my cervix for a better chance, and i have to follow all this instructions to the tee. and i have no problem with that. he told me that this means alot to me and hes going to do everything possible to make my dream come true..
but i still think of the worst, and i know i shouldn't be as i should be counting down the months till i can try again. he gives me hope and thats what im really needing at this point. i really need courage right now, and my best friend is helping me so much, and i know that well i hope that God will help me out with this.
Thanks girls for reading, im so nervous and scared outta my mind!!!

[joanie1981]

I am so very sorry for your losses.

I think it is completely natural for you to have anxiety or uncertainty about trying again. I am not sure that a happy "normal" pregnancy is ever achieved after experiencing a loss, you just have to know in your heart that this is what you want to do and you want to have another baby. I am a firm believer that if you try, now this is the hard part, try to keep a positive attitude, no matter what is going threw your head, that you can endure anything and your optimistic thoughts will bring you threw it.

I wish you lots of luck, when you are ready to TTC again

[Mum2three]

im trying my hardest to stay positive! i keep thinking that this time will be different. that now i have 2 angels looking over me. pregnancy comes natural for me. when we concieved William it was one shot! so im not concerned about getting pregnant. im just not sure if i would handle another loss again. im a strong person, but even the strongest hurts! and im doing everything that the dr said and im hoping and praying that everything works..thanks for showing support.

[linbein]

Big hugs to you!!!! I just suffered my first loss....and it wasn't nearly as far along as both of yours...but I totally understand how you feel. I am petrified to get pregnant again, but I want to have another baby. I actually posted a lot about this in my little journal today. I am so scared that I will worry non-stop about this next one. Our loss was due to a blighted ovum, and my doctor told me that it is a totally freak occurance, just chance, that it's nothing I did, nothing wrong with me. It's not that we can't have kids, cause I have an almost 4 year old little girl at home, so this happening...it was just chance. He said that our next pregnancy has the same odds as any other pregnancy of either being healthy or having a m/c. But it doesn't make me any less worried!
He said that we could get pregnant again as soon as we are ready, but I'm waiting till I at least have 1 normal AF, then we will try again. I'm scared to death to get pregnant too fast!
I totally feel your pain!!! How do you get tht courage to do it again???

[Mum2three]

im sorry for ur loss. its devastating! no matter what the cause or case may be. but sometimes u just have to suck it up buttercup and pick up the pieces and move forward. it was really hard for me to get pregnant again with William, but as long as u have it in ur head that this time is a charm then anything is possible. i really try to stay positive, not not do charting and stuff. when its meant to be it will happen. i hope that u stay focused and positive, and try not to let that pain affect the way u see ur self. thats what i have learn't over these 2 times. i have a lot of support from many ppl and that gets me through it. i wish u the best of luck, just like i said say positive!!
good luck!

[Brittanie]

I think courage comes of hope and faith. I'm petrified and have been since we decided to TTC again. For us, it also happened fairly quickly. But I'm now nearing my loss point (we lost Cora @ 38w1d). I, too, don't think I could handle another loss. At least...not right now.

I think 2007mama is right, I'm not sure a normal "happy" pregnancy can ever happen after a loss. I know that I'm feeling a huge disconnect from my DDC right now because they're all excited about the end of their pregnancies. There are several other women who have had losses in my DDC, but they were all either in the first or second trimesters, and now that they're past their loss points, they're relaxing and beginning to enjoy it.


I'm so afraid that I will complete another whole pregnancy, and still be childless.



Ugh, I meant to post and try to be encouraging, and I'm failing miserably. But thanks for letting me vent.

[Mum2three]

Well i must start out with Cora is beautiful!!
i couldn't imagine going through the pregnancy all fine then something like what happened to u happen. i thought i had it bad, when i lost my daughter at 25 weeks. like my mom has told me to keep my head up and count my blessings. and i do everyday.but man oh man, its so hard to let go! all that u want is to be happy, and i will admit that me getting pregnant again would be so nerve racking and scary the whole time..and i really don't want that. i want to enjoy my pregnancy.but its difficult. im just glad that i have ppl to talk to that have went through something like this. and i keep praying every night that i have just one more baby, but it feels like im a bad person and i don't deserve another child. but then i think again, well my 2 beautiful children are up in heaven and they know that mommy is destined to have 1 more. and i keep hope that they will touch me to let me know that things will be ok. and i feel that. i wont really be happy till im holding my child in my arms. but thats just me. thanks again for sharing ur story and helping me out. i wish u the best though out the rest of ur pregnancy, and Cora is watching over u to!

[Brittanie]

Well i must start out with Cora is beautiful!![/b]

Thanks, I think so too!

i couldn't imagine going through the pregnancy all fine then something like what happened to u happen. i thought i had it bad, when i lost my daughter at 25 weeks.[/b]

In the end, I think that loss is loss and it always hurts, no matter when it happens. My thought is "oh, man, she's lost two." So I guess we're both counting our blessings when looking at each other. I got to keep my Cora longer than you did either of your two, and I count that as a blessing. I guess that just a way of dealing with it though, trying to see positive in everything.

*sigh* I hope you get that third child you want so badly.