[katiesmom0219]

Does it make you stop thinking about your MC? Or does it make it worse worring it will happen again?

Here's my situation, and if anyone can relate please respond, it will make me feel so much better knowing I'm not alone. Just a quick background - I found out at my 10 week appt (with my second pregnancy) that there was no heart beat. So I had a D&C 4 weeks ago. I'm okay with the whole why it happend, but I'm not okay with accepting it. And lately it's getting worse.

I am surrounded by pregnant friends (one of them is my best friend), so the constant reminder is hard. But I feel like I'm avoiding them, esp my best friend. I am sooooo happy for her and all of my other friends, but since this has happend to me, I don't want to hear about their pregnancy, I don't ask any questions, nothing. I was at a 1 year old b-day party over the weekend and 5 women there were pregnant and that's all everyone talked about. I was asked twice when am I going to have a second - (I only told my family and close friends about the mc) - I felt like crying. Over the weekend I went to the mall - a day all to myself to shop - I should be on cloud 9 right - no I left the mall miserable!! I would walk pass the maternity section or store and get all upset thinking I should be looking in there, not in the regular sections. I had already packed away all of my warmer weather clothes, assuming I'd be in maternity by now and not needing them - so that got me upset again having to pull them out. My best friend was telling me how she needed to get some s/s tops to last her last few weeks of work - I have some that I had already bought - but I didn't even offer them to her. Is that wrong of me???

I think I'm rambeling, I'm sorry - I'm just so mixed up. DH will notice I'm in a mood and I just blow him off saying I'm tired or something. I kinda talk to him about it, but he can't really understand what I'm feeling, esp. since I don't even understand. I also wonder if I have so many mixed emotions b/c he and I haven't really sat down and talked about when to start trying again. I know him, and I know he'll be ready whenever I am, but then I wonder what if he's not.

I guess what I'm wondering is once we do start TTC again, will I stop feeling so emotional about all of this??? Part of me feels like I'm almost jealous of my pregnant friends, but then part of me is just upset because I keep thinking about where I should be right now and I'm not. I don't like feeling this way, and I thought by now (a month later) I'd be passed all of this.

Can anyone relate? And if you are TTC now, did it put your crazy emotions out of your head b/c you had TTC to focus on?

[Gemini2323]

I know where you are coming from. I had a m/c in January at 5 wks and I still think about it a lot. I probably make it worse because each week I think about how many weeks I would be, like now I would be 14 weeks and it just upsets me like crazy. Plus I have a book "Pregnancy Week by Week" and I check out where I would be with that.

My two sister in laws are pregnant and that's all they talk about so it's really hard to be around them and not be jealous but at the same time I am really happy for them of course! I'm excited to see their little ones, just hope I can have one sometime soon too.

We are waiting a little longer to try again but I don't know if it'll make me forget about what happened or make me think about it more and worry like crazy it will happen again. But worrying will not change anything as if it's meant to happen or not it will and you can't change the outcome. But I think focusing on ttc will give me something to look forward to.

[Hannahsmommie]

I can completely understand how you feel. I have a hard time around other pregnant people. My DD is 4 and I get comments all the time like "don't you think it's time for another?"....some people are so ignorant. For me, I think TTC has helped me look toward the positive of conceiving again. I still think about my loss and get down at times, but I think if we weren't TTC it would be worse.

Best of luck to you in whatever you decide to do. We're all here for you.

[Mum2three]

i can relate BIG time! i lost our son William on Feb,15,2007. and ever since i lost him, everyone has become pregnant or still is pregnant! and i tell u it hurts like hell. my best friend is due on the day that i was due wil William, and it kills me inside to know that she got to keep her child and i couldnt! now my other best friend that is currently staying with me till she gets her own place, is pregnant! and she just found out. it hurst big time, and its not easy to close ur wounds. its a sore subject with anyone. my friends know that with me that i tend to get every angry with the whole situation so they really dont speak about their pregnancies to me, unless i have asked. and thats what a good friend is. ur not going to be able to get over it, it takes time, and right now hun, time is all u got. time is ur best friend. dont look at the negitive side of ur friends pregnancys think about the positive that u to will be right next to them with ur big old tummy..its going to get better in time..i wish u all the luck in the world! and i hope ur wishes come true!

[CTK3989]

*Hugs* TTC doesn't make you stop thinking about the child that you lost. In fact, I found that it made me think about it more and what my brief pregnancy was like. Before I had my son all I could think about was the pregnant women around me. It made it very difficult to cope but I made it through and I know you will too. I'm sorry if none of this was helpful, just know that I'm here for you if you would like to talk. I'm sorry for your loss. *Hugs*

Chelci