Mostly Venting

dzine21 · #1 April 30th, 2007, 11:25 AM

I'm scared to get pg yet again. Sure, I'd love to be pg, but I fear of going through the same things. Having m/s for weeks upon weeks. Missing work again. You know, work can only be understanding for so long. I've had to take time off for 2 out of the 3 m/c. I'm sure they don't want to keep me in this job if I can't seem to be here. And I love the fact that I got called to Jury duty next month. I bet they'll love that too. There's just so much to take in with everything that has been happening. I want to TTC when we can, but what if my body just can't handle it? I'm not blaming myself or anyone else. I guess I just don't know where to go from here. Do we TTC naturally again? Do we go for the clomid that we were about to go on? What if the only way to go is IVF? My gosh, IVF--my job will love me doing that! We're still on a timeline for a family cruise. I do not want to be pregnant on the cruise and I don't think I can take a 1 month old on the ship. I can't bare thinking of giving up--we've been trying for quite a while. I would feel like I was messing with fate if we used medical interventions. I hope we can figure out what's going on with me soon. If for some odd reason I can't bear children, I hope we find out soon. I'd be more than willing to adopt.

Ok, vent over. I guess I could just use a hug. Could you send some my way, please?

Shaustin · #2 April 30th, 2007, 11:42 AM

BIG BIG BIG

Sarah. I'm so sorry you are having all these feelings. I cannot understand what you are going through completely. But I do understand the fear with trying again, and I do understand not knowing if the timing is right with upcoming events.

Just want you to know I'm thinking about you.

tparum · #3 April 30th, 2007, 11:42 AM

#4 April 30th, 2007, 12:12 PM

zzz · #5 April 30th, 2007, 12:29 PM

I won't say I know how you feel... but I have some of the same fears. After my 2nd miscarriage I didn't think I could get pregnant again and suffer another loss. I thought about giving up, but then the thought of not having another baby was worse. It's tough all the way around.

*Hugs*