Would you tell your family right away this time?

Danica · #1 October 12th, 2007, 08:59 AM

When you get a positive pregnancy test this next time do you think you'd tell your friends and family right away?

I told all my friends and family last time right away and I really think I would tell them again. I figure I will need their support if I m/c again. What are your thoughts?

ShannonMVT · #2 October 12th, 2007, 09:07 AM

I have mixed feelings. But I think I would tell them right away.

Last time I was waiting until after my doctor's appointment (so that I could have an u/s photo) but that didn't work out, so I ended up telling them over the phone that I was pregnant and would probably miscarry.

If I had just told them right away then at least we could have all been happy for awhile.

Part of me still clings to the way I wanted to tell everyone and I'm sad that it didn't happen that way and now it never really will. But there is really nothing I can do about that.

So I guess I'll tell right away (to family). I will need their support and prayers no matter what happens.

EmilyRenee · #3 October 12th, 2007, 10:40 AM

Quote:

When you get a positive pregnancy test this next time do you think you'd tell your friends and family right away?

I told all my friends and family last time right away and I really think I would tell them again. I figure I will need their support if I m/c again. What are your thoughts?[/b]

Hi...I m/c on august 12. I had found out and gone to the docs 3 days prior. I was initially not going to tell anybody yet but i told a couple people and then just couldn't stop. Then had to go to the hospital (thought i was having a m/c) which i was, and i left in the middle of church. It ended up i had a cyst so my mother (bless her heart i love her but) she told someone at the church to pray for me and everyone ended up finding out. After sending me home without surgery thank goodness i found out three days later my levels were going down. So after all that it was very hard because so many people had found out. Also, some people as you probably found out aren't as sensitive as others and that was difficult to have to explain everything. Anyway, I got af once and we started trying again this month. Hopefully next week we will find out if I am or not. I think this time if i am I will send out christmas cards with an ultrasound pic (if i make it that far, crossing fingers). In your case I think i would just tell close friends and family. You do need support during a time like that even if you feel you don't need it. And its ok to pick and choose who to tell. Pick the people who were supportive but not to invasive to tell. Those are the kind of people you need. Hope you get pg soon.

dee68 · #4 October 12th, 2007, 12:23 PM

last time I called and told everyone right away !......
IF I do get a bfp again, I will probably do the same thing, but that is just how I am .....
of course all of you girls would know first

*Bobbie* · #5 October 12th, 2007, 04:59 PM

I will probably tell close family right away and after about 6-8 weeks everyone else.

I told everyone last time right away and was glad I did because I needed the love and support of everyone around me to get through my m/c. Some days all I wanted to do was cry and at least they understood why.

MinDB · #6 October 12th, 2007, 06:39 PM

i think i'll tell my close family, my really close friends, and every on here.
but i'm not going to have everyone know like they did the last.
i didn't realize how many people knew until i had them ask about how i was feeling and then explain everything to them!

Frangipani · #7 October 12th, 2007, 07:09 PM

Honestly I don't think I'll tell anyone other than DH until I'm further along. Just can't take having to explain it all. I have this company picnic I have to go to for DH tomorrow and I KNOW a lot of the ppl there are going to ask me. I'm dreading it.

..Jessica.. · #8 October 14th, 2007, 04:45 PM

With my last pregnancy, I told a few friends, my sister and my mom. I'm glad I did, because I can't imagine having to tell my mother after-the-fact that I had a miscarriage. And I'm grateful for all of the support I received from my friends & family. I think with my next pregnancy, I'd still tell those few friends, my sister and my mom. My dad would be after the first u/s appointment, maybe sooner since he'd be doing my room for me. And I'd tell everyone else when I start to show or can't work anymore.

*Judy* · #9 October 14th, 2007, 07:50 PM

I will not tell anyone until I am about 12-14 weeks. With the first pregnancy we told everyone after we confirmed with blood work that I was pregnant. We then had to call them the following day and let them know I was bleeding and would most likely miscarry. With the second one we only told my mom, his mom and his brother. (His brother's wife told ALL of her family after we told them not to tell any one. This really ticked me off as I didn't even tell my sisters. What business does she have telling people our news before we got the chance to share it.). This time, if it happens, there is nooooo way we are even telling our parents. Dh and I talked about it. I am a people pleaser and I feel in some way I let people down when I miscarry and it's hard enough to face our dissapointment let alone someone else's. And if I miscarry again I am out. We will not be trying again. I admire the women who have had several misscarriages and keep trying. I just don't know if I would be strong enough to do it again.

elismom · #10 October 15th, 2007, 08:28 AM

Quote:

When you get a positive pregnancy test this next time do you think you'd tell your friends and family right away?

I told all my friends and family last time right away and I really think I would tell them again. I figure I will need their support if I m/c again. What are your thoughts?[/b]

I agree. We will tell a few supportive family and friends. We have had two losses this year and have needed/wanted the love and support of a few family and friends.