Forum: Trying to Conceive after Loss
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January 12th, 2008, 09:38 PM
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just me
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Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Littleton, CO
Posts: 39,667
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I really am thinking this feeling of wanting to be pregnant isn't just coming from me. I've been reading in my scriptures lately, and the lesson manual that my church puts out for Sunday school, and I think that it may be more that it's a prompting of what God wants me to do.
But I'm so scared to talk to my husband about it. When I got my bfn on Wednesday his response was "good, I really didn't want you to be pregnant again so soon."
Ugh. I don't know what to say to him.
Does this sound silly?
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January 12th, 2008, 10:00 PM
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Mega Super Mommy
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Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: Colorado
Posts: 4,478
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I don't think it sounds silly at all. I think you should just talk to your husband with an open heart and share your feelings. What is the worst that can happen
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January 12th, 2008, 10:22 PM
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just me
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Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Littleton, CO
Posts: 39,667
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Danica, thanks. I really needed to hear that. I mean, what IS the worst that can happen? He tells me I'm silly. *shrugs* We'll see what happens.
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January 12th, 2008, 10:58 PM
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Mega Super Mommy
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Join Date: Aug 2006
Posts: 4,486
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I don't think it's silly either Brittanie!! Like Danica said, just be open and honest with your DH, you have nothing to lose! Good luck!!
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January 13th, 2008, 02:25 AM
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Mega Super Mommy
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Join Date: Oct 2006
Posts: 2,632
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Brittanie,
I think the girls are right, just talk to him! Also I don't think he really means that he doesn't want you to be pregnant again so soon. I think he is just enjoying a little less "stress" right now. I am sure that he worries more when you are pregnant. He worries about you too. At least this is some of the stuff that my dh has told me. As much as mine wants to have another baby he is enjoying the less stressful times, hence the reason he doesn't want to know anything about ttc. Talking to your dh might do you both some good!
__________________
 Thank you Mistyx5 for my siggy.
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January 13th, 2008, 04:01 AM
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Platinum Supermommy
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Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: South Carolina
Posts: 7,091
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I agree with all the previous posters and say just go for it. Talk to your husband, and you might even be surprised at his reaction. If God is leading you, then eventually DH will start feeling it too. That's how it always works with my DH & I.
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January 13th, 2008, 07:46 AM
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Mega Super Mommy
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Join Date: May 2007
Posts: 2,118
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I agree as well. Just be open and honest with him...if you're really open about your feelings with him and tell him more about why you're yearning for another baby so badly, who knows? He might surprise you!
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January 13th, 2008, 09:39 AM
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Platinum Supermommy
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Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: California
Posts: 7,567
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i agree with everyone above
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January 13th, 2008, 09:57 AM
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Platinum Supermommy
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Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Illinois ( originally From New Jersey:)
Posts: 13,040
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I totally agree with what all of the ladies said~~
Good Luck !!
~HUGS~
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January 13th, 2008, 12:31 PM
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Mega Super Mommy
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Join Date: Aug 2007
Posts: 2,926
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I don't think I can add anything, it sounds like everyone has covered it, but I just wanted to let you know that I agree with them. What is the worst that could happen??
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January 13th, 2008, 02:32 PM
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Platinum Supermommy
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Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: Canada
Posts: 11,084
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I agree completely with the other ladies!
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January 13th, 2008, 04:13 PM
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Veteran
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Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Lynnwood, WA
Posts: 464
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I'm probably taking an unpopular and against-the-grain stance here, but... consider this.
On one hand, you're worried and want to open up to your husband and share your feelings with him. On the other hand, he made that comment to you. Is it possible that is how he feels? I mean, really? Maybe he's telling you how he -really- feels, and it's not a cover up for something else.
It might really hurt, I understand and believe me I can relate. But don't get so hurt you can't hear what he's feeling. Because his feelings are important too, right? Guys work differently, and just because he may not be ready yet "so soon" doesn't mean he's totally anti-child either.
Anyways, just my two cents.
PS: I hope you don't take this the wrong way. I'm having AF for the first time in over 14 months so maybe I'm just hyper-sensitive.
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January 13th, 2008, 05:17 PM
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Platinum Supermommy
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Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: Midland,tx
Posts: 6,456
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i agree with talking with him u really should talk with him and he just might surprise ya.
__________________

Allways Remembering our Angels
Angelina Marie 08-02-99, William Dewayne 02-08-01, Thomas Ray 07-30-02 and BabyBean 02-22-08 and BabyBean 03/02/2012
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January 13th, 2008, 05:24 PM
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Platinum Supermommy
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Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Rochester, NY
Posts: 15,520
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 what everyone else said... even that part about listening to DH's feelings. I am sure you two can come to some sort of an agreement.
Good luck
__________________
Bobbie mom to : Jeremy (21) Amanda (17) Matthew (3) and Daniel (20 months) step-mom to: Stephany(21) and Krista (18)
step-grandma to: Wesley (23 months)
On 1/31 at exactly 16 weeks pregnant Noah came too soon. He was our 7th loss If you would like to see pictures of my sweet (but tiny) boy they can be viewed at www.caringbridge.org/visit/noahdarrohn they aren't the easiest pitures to look at but I am willing to share them with anyone who would like to see them <3
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January 13th, 2008, 07:43 PM
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Platinum Supermommy
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Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Priest Lake, Idaho
Posts: 12,946
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Quote:
I don't think it sounds silly at all. I think you should just talk to your husband with an open heart and share your feelings. What is the worst that can happen [/b]
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Danica said it the best. I hope you two can be on the same page quickly.
__________________
Thank you Zarziza for a beautiful siggy Missing my dad 2/23/1961-11/1/2010
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January 13th, 2008, 11:37 PM
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just me
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Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Littleton, CO
Posts: 39,667
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Well, he said today "I don't want that kind of stress right now." I can understand that. His example, thought, was my friend Adrienne who is 15 weeks pregnant and just had to have her gallbladder out and there were complications and she's still in the hospital.
So yeah, he's worried about something happening to ME not the baby. I can understand that too with as sick as I get.
So, I'll be patient. He knows my feelings. I know his. I think we'll just let this percolate for a while and see what happens. I mean, I haven't even had a post-partum period yet, so we've got to wait on that.
But if we don't make a decision and end up pregnant by March, then I'm going to wait until after DH graduates to TTC. I don't want to have to switch doctors/insurance during the pregnancy. I'd rather either have the baby born before we leave Rexburg, or not get pregnant until after.
I don't know. But it's not imperative that we decide right now.
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