This makes me mad

Banned-ZoesMom · #1 March 1st, 2008, 06:02 AM

After my first and second miscarriage, I turned to my pregnancy bible, What To Expect When You're Expecting because I knew with Zoe, I had read a lot about miscarriage. Well in one of the boxes on miscarriage (I can't remember what page) it says that most women who have a miscarriage, never have another one, Just being in this board and experiencing it myself and from what friends tell me (about other friends who have had more than one miscarriage), it's a total load of bullcrap. I think they need to change that. By putting that in there, they're giving a lot of women who have suffered losses false hope, and it's completely unfair. On another page, it says that most women who have a miscarriage go on to later have a healthy pregnancy, which is fine and true, but to say that most women who miscarry never have another miscarriage is a blatant, untrue statement, and they need to change it.

Sorry, needed to rant.

keekopeeko · #2 March 1st, 2008, 06:20 AM

everywhere else ive heard that once you have one, your chances of having another one go UP... i guess just because some women are more apt to have them than others..

i dont know.. but i think its about 50/50 for the women ive talked to that have had more than one miscarriage or just one...

~Em

Banned-ZoesMom · #3 March 1st, 2008, 06:48 AM

It's so weird though, because nobody in my family has ever had any reproductive problems. No miscarriages, no infertility issues, no hysterectomies, no endometriosis, and suddenly, I have 2 miscarriages, endometriosis, infertility issues (if you count the ability to get pregnant but not keep one as infertility). However, Mike's side of the family, two of his sisters' had hysterectomies at 22 and 23, one had endometriosis, and Mike's mom has suffered two miscarriages of 2 sets of twins. It's like I've adopted his family's reporductive problems. Now I'm worried for Zoe, that she'll have to go through the same thing!!

But seriously, if adopting Mike's family's reproductive problems isn't a sign that we should marry, I don't know what is.

Melanie0507 · #4 March 1st, 2008, 08:10 AM

I guess I don't really know what the stats are, but my doctor told me that even though I've had a m/c does not increase my chances of having another m/c next time. I guess he could have just told me that...

I definitely understand your frustration though Brandi!

tparum · #5 March 1st, 2008, 08:27 AM

ive read that book and i read it everytime im pg. and i seen that part i wonder if someone should wright them and tell them that they need to change that lol. cause i really wished it was like that u never have another m/c again after 1. but they need to realize this is life ur not promised even a sec in life. but they do need to have there facts right b4 they put stuff like that in there books.

ShannonMVT · #6 March 1st, 2008, 08:35 PM

My doctor also told me that my risk would not increase.

I did find this page: http://miscarriage.tripod.com/first_questions.htm

It says that after one miscarriage, your risk of another increases from 10% to 13%. So it is an increase, but not a huge one.

I know it probably seems like there are a lot of women who have had multiple miscarraiges (and there are) but I think also those are the women most likely to post in a loss board. I've seen lots of women on JM with only one loss that don't really post much on the loss boards.

All this said, I just have to hold onto hope that my next pregnancy will be different. Otherwise I'll go crazy.

heatherrose415 · #7 March 2nd, 2008, 09:24 AM

I was also told my risk does not increase after 1 miscarriage. I think the book is right in saying that "most" of the time you do not go on to miscarry again, but obviously some do and I am very sorry

and am scared to death myself of miscarrying again.

I would honestly hate to read a book that told me my chances of having a healthy baby were even lower again, I would go crazy like the above poster also. I need to hold on to that hope.

I really hope you get pregnant again and have a very healthy baby to hold!! you deserve it!

Banned-ZoesMom · #8 March 2nd, 2008, 10:06 AM

Almost every woman I know has had more than one miscarriage, most of those consecutive. The only ones I know who have't had more than one are my friend who had her baby yesterday morning, and friends who haven't become pregnant again after their miscarriage. I'm not saying that they authors should have it say "Women who miscarry once will or might go on to miscarry again", I'm saying to omit that statement about most women not miscarrying again, because it gives false hope.