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  #1  
November 8th, 2012, 03:27 PM
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Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: Boston, MA
Posts: 44
Does anyone else have family members who think you should stop having kids after a certain amount??? I have 3 and we will be trying for #4 but my parents and inlaws say "omg dont you dare" WHAT??? They say 3 is enough... 1st of all i decide how many kids are enough. I feel like just because someone is happy with 1 or 2 kids and that completes them doesnt mean it completes me. I have always wanted 4. I know kids are expensive...we dont live out of our means, our cars are paid for my kids get what they need and we have no debt. SOOOOO i dont get why it annoys others.... just figured i would see if anyone else has people giving them crap about the number of kids they have?
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  #2  
November 8th, 2012, 04:11 PM
bella88's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: Australia
Posts: 4,056
I personally would not want to or choose to have four children, but that is mostly out of selfishness and not wanting to have to trade in for a bigger car I hate it enough when I have to drive our dual cab ute, I love my little city car! But I don't see why it is anyone's business how many other children people have, even if it is family. I can understand if you had loads of debt and lived from pay to pay but that is obviously not the case. I don't know if my family would get too uppety about family size seeing as I am the eldest of four myself but I am expecting some negativity because we haven't finished saving for our house deposit yet. Mostly from my grandad though. My father, on the other hand, would encourage me to "sneak a pill baby through"
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  #3  
November 8th, 2012, 07:19 PM
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Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: texas
Posts: 1,059
i get the same thing...i have four my oldest is 14..and we r trying for our last....and i get the same thing m"again" blah blah blah...i dont care what they tghink..they can go the other way...i dont talk to half of them anyway....i love babies...and my kids are my life...so...mu advice keep making those babies have 19 pf them..the duggars are doing just fine
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  #4  
November 9th, 2012, 09:49 AM
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Join Date: Oct 2012
Posts: 89
Nobody has any business deciding how many kids you get to have. I am glad you are not listening to anyone. Right now, we have one and I hear people telling us we should have more. I say, we will decide when the time comes.
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  #5  
November 9th, 2012, 02:07 PM
Spyctre's Avatar Arwen
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: Freaking Louisiana
Posts: 7,704
I've had people tell me two were too many. lol But this is my life not theirs, and I tell them as much. They have or had their chance to decide such things.
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  #6  
November 9th, 2012, 04:47 PM
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Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: South Bend, IN
Posts: 13
I'm still cooking my first, so I've sort of had the opposite problem! People have wanted to know for years when I was going to ever start having kids. Either way, it's no one's business. If you want four kids and you have the means to care for them, that's all that matters. I think the only way friends or family would have a legitimate reason to criticize is if the person couldn't raise the kids safely or didn't have enough money. That's obviously not the case with you. Plus, I bet they'll be more than thrilled when a new baby comes along. Isn't that always how it works?
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  #7  
November 9th, 2012, 06:34 PM
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Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: Boston, MA
Posts: 44
Thanks Girls!!! it so annoying when people give you an opinion based on what they feel! I feel like if you choose to have 1 or 2 kids thats great! thats what you want, what you feel in your heart and what completes you. If you decide to wait to have kids until your 40 great thats what work for you! I just cant get the thought out of my head about 1 more. I have always said for as long as i can remember i wanted 4 kids. But honestly now having 3 made me stop and think and wait before making the desicion to have another. I know its another child another mouth to feed and what if everything doesnt go as well as it did with my other pregnancies?? thats what scares me.
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  #8  
November 9th, 2012, 06:44 PM
Spyctre's Avatar Arwen
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: Freaking Louisiana
Posts: 7,704
I'm having a similar problem. I want a third, but I have one with Autism and one without. Since I have one with, I get a 5%+ chance of another. I was lucky to have a typical baby, but what if I don't get that lucky again? Part of me wants to wait to see just how typical #2 is, but age also has a factor in Autism so the time to conceive is now. =P Ugh.
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  #9  
November 9th, 2012, 07:22 PM
Dolly Lama's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Location: Baltimore, MD
Posts: 1,767
I have a teen and a preteen, and my family/friends think that I'm nuts for wanting to do this all over again. They think that it's time to "do me" and leave the pampers and bottles alone...In the end, I don't care what anyone thinks. DH and I would love to have more children, and we can afford to take care of them, so what's the problem?

The thing is that the opinionated people in our lives aren't going to be the ones caring for and financially supporting our children, so it's not their decision. If you want to do it, go for it! Only you know what's right for you and the little family that you already have.
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  #10  
November 10th, 2012, 03:03 AM
jellybean93's Avatar Super Mommy
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: South Africa
Posts: 645
I want 5... Still need to get #1 going though Thankfully i am one of 5 and DF is one of 4, so i wont get TOO much criticism from family (friends on the other hand!)
Ive just made it very clear that that is where i see my family complete, and i feel i have enough love in my heart for at least 5 souls to call me mommy. I couldn't be arsed what anyone else has to say about it I do get the "FIVE!!!!" comments on a very regular basis though, i just smile and say "YUP!!" and end the conversation right there haha
People will always have an opinion about something, if it weren't for the amount of kids you have it will be for something else....
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  #11  
November 10th, 2012, 10:27 AM
Dolly Lama's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Quote:
People will always have an opinion about something, if it weren't for the amount of kids you have it will be for something else....
Isn't that the truth?!
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  #12  
November 12th, 2012, 10:35 AM
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Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Auburn, PA
Posts: 137
It is absolutely no ones business how many children you have. As long as you pay for them and handle them no one should say a word. I was told after I had my son that people were so shocked at my new ability to be a mother they doubted me thru my pregnancy and we so worried when my son was born...***!!!! Really do you think I would try to have a baby and then what toss out in the street come on! And when we orginally talked about trying for #2 we had mixed reviews my mother didn't have much to say...to find out later when we decided to wait til next year that she was very glad...she was more worried about our financials understandable but my mother in law shocked me when I said I want #2 she was like oh no don't do it. I just don't understand!
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  #13  
December 3rd, 2012, 01:42 PM
FishermansWife4's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Mar 2012
Posts: 2,577
DH & I have 4 total. I gave birth to 3 and have one amazing step son. I get flack all the time about how many children I have and "OH DON'T YOU DARE HAVE ANOTHER CHILD!" Our finances are in order and my youngest is 2. I've been ready for two years (I was praying for twins when I got pg with my DS and wanted to start trying right away but DH thought we should wait.) I'm not getting any younger so why not? My DH agrees with me. We've been ttc #5 for 9 months, and I'm praying I get my BFP soon. to you all! I pray your journey to get your bfps is an easy one.
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