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Forum: Children with Developmental Delays and Disorders

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  #1  
May 2nd, 2009, 09:10 PM
mommaluvs2730's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Wasington
Posts: 8,740
Not sure if this is related or not to pdd but it seems Nicole should be warming up to Hannah, her little sister (ten months old), and she hasnt yet. She has never once wanted to hold her, she doesnt want her near her whatsoever. But she will say Sissy and Hannah. Say goodnight to her. She has fed her once, she use to touch her hair, but she always acts as if she has the plague and cant stand to be touched by her. She has even gone as far as kick her down and push her but I dont think she is doing it to be mean all the time. Most the time she isnt watching what she is doing but purposely kicking her legs
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  #2  
May 3rd, 2009, 05:18 AM
Tofu Bacon
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Its very possible. Ds really didn't even notice dd until she was a good 3 or 4 months old, since then I have to watch like a hawk because he can be very rough with her... but it doesn't appear to be in a dliberately mean way, just more of a cause and effect type of thing: "When I push her down she leaves me alone." But same as your LO, he will do little things to help her now and then, or tell her he loves her.

I don't know, this physical "combat" has been going on for a year now and I am as much at a loss as ever; I'm more of a positive discipline kind of mom, but that just isn't cutting it with this particular situation. Our in-home teacher that comes a few afternoons per week has been showing me techniques like physically blocking him with my body without touching him, or just scooping dd up and leaving the room. Completely by accident (while washing dishes one day) I discovered that wet hands deter him, so whenever he starts to get physical I run to the sink and wet my hands; it freaks him out and he stops right then and there.

Last edited by Tofu Bacon; May 3rd, 2009 at 05:23 AM.
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  #3  
May 3rd, 2009, 09:56 AM
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I so know how this is. Jay had no intrest In Jonathan when he was a baby. I remember Sheiroky brought Jay in the hospital after Jonathan was born and he freaked out and kept throwing tantrums. Even when got older he was not intrested in him. He gets agressive with Jonathan. He is not as bad as before. If he gets agressive he goes in time out. My version of time out is Bear hugging him on my lap. He hates but it can be pretty effective. He is not getting hit. Its not something I am proud of but I used to smack his butt. I will not do it anymore. I will not do it anymore because I am becoming more into gentle discipline. I used to do 1-2-3 magic but it does not work. Now he gets one warning. I also make him give his brother a hug and praise when he does.

Get on top of this now. For me I know that some of the agression is due to Jay's Autism but we let him know that being agressive is not acceptable.
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  #4  
May 3rd, 2009, 10:15 AM
mommaluvs2730's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Location: Wasington
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I think the way she deals with it has something to do with the whole autism thing if that is what she has. But part of me wants to say its just a sibling rivalry thing kwim? I use to always try and keep Hannah away but she is just interested in her big sissy. She loves her. So Ive tried to just let Nicole handle it cuz sooner or later she will need to get use to the fact that she has a sister and she she is annoying lol but it doesnt seem to be working. I just dont know whether I should intervene or not.
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  #5  
May 3rd, 2009, 10:25 AM
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Yeah its hard but I would intervine because honestly it could get worse before it gets better.
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  #6  
May 3rd, 2009, 10:36 AM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jun 2008
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I don't have an answer but I just wanted to throw this out there for what is it worth...

My ASD 2 yr old acts like his baby sister doesn't exist. He has only looked at her maybe 5 times in the last 6 months. Because he doesn't acknowledge her at all I feel pretty comfortable leaving the room for a minute or two.

On the complete opposite side, my typical 2 year old daughter loves her baby sister, she gives her lots of hugs and kisses, they play peek a boo and just seem to really enjoy each other. Although I don't trust my older DD with the baby for long because she just doesn't get that she is hurting her sometimes. She has been know to flip over her bouncer chair, shake her in the jumparoo, hit her on the head with a toy etc.

It's kinda a weird combo here seeing how differently my kids react to the baby.
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