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How would you feel


Forum: Children with Developmental Delays and Disorders

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  #1  
February 26th, 2008, 04:52 PM
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Join Date: Jun 2006
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There is another board I go on and I told them about Jay's DX.. Some of the people think I should get a second opinion. I trust the doctor. If I had any feeling she was wrong I would get a 2nd opinion. One person qouted part of the signs he is showing and saying that is boy stuff or toddler stuff and I would hate to see him labeled at such a early age. It really rubbed me the wrong way. Maybe I do not like the word label and I have heard that autistic children to go to leave normal lives. I kind of feels like the whole your nuts thing all over again. I just replied and told them how I felt. I know they were probaly just trying to help but burying my head in the sand or saying I think the doctor is wrong when I had a gut feeling to begin with is not going to get Jay better. I said thanks for the input but I would appricate if people could stop saying its normal toddler behavior or a boy thing. I said I need support right now and if people can not give that instead of saying its normal blah blah I am going to leave.
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  #2  
February 26th, 2008, 07:02 PM
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Personally, I would rather he be "mis-labelled" early on and get all that therapy and instruction and make a ton of progress and get re-assessed later on and find out they were wrong, than not accept the diagnosis, deny the services, and waste precious time, have him make no progress, and realize the diagnosis was right after all.
I'm sure they meant well, but I understand how you felt.
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  #3  
February 26th, 2008, 07:25 PM
MrsStuartD's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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You know I was told that at this age you can get a diagnoses and work on treatment (and really what's the harm in the treatments anyway? It's not like we're giving them medications), but that you don't know how bad it is or really how they fit on the spectrum until they are older. I have had a few of those comments too and I know how you feel. But I hope you feel like you can come here and talk to us. You don't need to get a second opinion. He was diagnosed and as a Mom you KNOW. Trust your instinct. The sooner he gets treatment the better off he will be right?
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  #4  
February 27th, 2008, 02:02 AM
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Thanks... I am done at the other board. Someone went as far as saying that it seems like I got the diagnosis I want. I come back and talk about getting aid after his appt. Well I was only saying what the doctor said. I am so done there.
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  #5  
February 27th, 2008, 09:19 AM
fiefer87's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Wow, that was a really harsh comment. Like any of us really want our kids to be diagnosed with autism. I mean we know something is wrong, our gut tells us its autism, but we hope we are wrong. But once you get the diagnosis (and even before for most of us), you begin to accept it and look towards the future. You do everything as early as you can and as quickly as you can to make sure that the right therapies are in place so they can go on to lead as "normal" of lives as possible. I don't blame you for leaving the other board. I would have too.
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  #6  
February 27th, 2008, 10:11 AM
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Yeah I thought that comment was harsh to. I kept my mouth shut and decided I am not going back. Its a waste of my time.
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  #7  
February 27th, 2008, 12:23 PM
MrsStuartD's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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I totally agree! That comment was way off base. Who would have th nerve to say that anyway? I'm glad you still like it here!
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  #8  
February 27th, 2008, 01:05 PM
Tammyjh's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Well, while I do believe that autism is becoming way over dx'd these days, I say that you have to go with your gut. I also agree with Crissy...its best to go with the dx for now and get him all the help you can. It will be beneficial for him one way or the other and you'll also learn alot along the way.

They were very rude to you...sorry to hear that
Remember, they don't live in your house so they really have no idea. What I've found is that on paper, a lot of my dd's behaviors sound almost normal or normal but when someone(besides us)actually see how things go down when she's displaying the behaviors, they're floored.
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  #9  
February 29th, 2008, 11:31 AM
outnumbered's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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I'm so sorry you experienced that. I agree with the ladies before me. Hunter is re-evaluated for autism every three years. Some kids drop the label, some kids don't. Hunter hasn't yet, but he still may.

My MIL was one to tell me that Hunter was fine, that I had to stop talking for him/doing things for him and he'd come around. Even now, Hunter will forget to eat unless I tell him it's dinner time. My hubby wants him to spend a week with his parents over the summer and I will not let that happen. I don't think they'll do him any harm, but I don't even want to think about what might happen.

He's your son, you know him best, continue to follow your gut instinct. If they were in your shoes, they'd have done the same thing.
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