[mrshulk]

So my daughter is about to be 4 years old and she has become quite close with a girl the same age across the way. At first I liked the little girl but now my daughter is coming to me saying her friend wants her to play the boyfriend/grildfriend game and I was like how do you play that? My daughter said her friend tries to kiss her. I was like I dont want you playing that game with her anymore. My daughter said she wont. Then yesterday my daughter told me her friend told her about sex, i was like what did she tell you? My daughter said thats when she lays on top of you. I was really alarmed and now I dont even want my daughter to go play at her house or in her backyard or in my house! I dont know how to bring this up to that little girls mum? And my daughters birthday party is this weekend and I invited them!

[Cesca]

Eek! I would definitely bring it up to the parents before the party. I think I would call the parents and just tell them what your daughter has been saying when she comes home from playing with her friend. Maybe the friend is getting it from another friend? Either way the parents need to know just in case someone is doing something the friend.

[cybele]

From what I gather, the "laying on top of each other" interpretation of sex is pretty common around that age range, they catch a peek of something they shouldnt on TV, or they go wandering during the night and see Mum and Dad doing something, or they get told this 'information' by older siblings or cousins, and that is the only interpretation that makes sense to them. (one of my kids also came home from school in grade 1 telling me about sex being "when two people hug and kiss at the same time")

I think the best thing to do would be to talk to your daughter about appropriate play and inappropriate play. I dont think this little girl is really at any fault, after all, she dosent know what she is talking about either. Are the parents the type you can talk to? If they are they maybe bring it up and you can work out together where this is coming from, if theyre not, then if they live across the road from each other then the friendship is inevitable, so maybe try to have more of the playdates at your house, where you can supervise the play, and intervene where necessary?

[mrshulk]

Thanks for your advice!