[momoftwins]

I think it's interesting to hear about our HS days! We talked about what activities we were involved in and awards and such, but do you think you are the same person now as you were in HS, or have you changed? What would people from HS remember about you?

People remember my friend/boyfriend drama the most. My Sophomore year, I had my first serious boyfriend (I had had other "boyfriends" but this guy was my ever so sweet, first love!). We were together on and off through high school until my best friend decided she wanted him!! Not cool. She was the best friend I had ever had, basically like long lost sisters. So I had to deal with losing my best friend AND my boyfriend at once. The whole school knew how things went down and were pretty much all on Team Betsy (wooo hoooo, lol), with the exception of her small group of friends that she had left. I think she learned her lesson that friends don't steal other friend's boyfriends! Everybody thought she'd be after their boyfriend next!

I didn't speak to her after that at all. We were done. The BF however apologized 1000 times and begged for my forgiveness. Smart. He and I stayed friends and had a few "relapses" even up through my Freshman year of college. I still talk to him and he even came to my wedding.

Fast forward to 8 years after we had graduated from HS, when she randomly emailed me. She had felt awful all of these years and wanted me to know that. I was shocked, but I accepted her apology and we went right back to being great friends. Pretty crazy. I guess we were meant to be friends more than enemies. I just keep a close eye on her around DH! Lol...nah, not really. As long as we don't bring up the BF's name, we're good. That happened once and it was BEYOND awkward, so never again! Lol.

People from HS were absolutely floored that we had become good friends again. That was pretty fun to share, just for the reaction factor. I still think I'm the same girl from HS, just older and more confident in myself. I think through that whole experience I learned how loyal I really am and maybe even more loyal than I think I should be! It also made me much more outgoing, losing my best friend and boyfriend at once. I spent every minute with one of them, so I learned to make more good friends, not "putting all my eggs into one basket" as my mom used to say! I can now look back and say that I'm glad that all happened!

[edgeofelise]

Betsy, I don't think it's weird that you guys are friends again at all! I find it strange that people can carry grudges about things like that for so long, after the offending person has grown and changed and apologized. People do stupid, stupid sh*t when they're young!

Oh, my, how I've changed. I was a spineless, meek little thing in HS. Chubby, awkward beyond belief, and I surrounded myself with the bi*chy girl friends to hide behind. My best friend was the hot one, and boy did she like to rub that in, and I was the funny one. The sidekick. Then, senior year, I fell for one of the art boys. He was actually younger than me but he had really great taste (hahahahahaha--for a 16 year old Ohio kid) in music and he was really interesting. Anyway, he treated me like crap and had another GF that I knew about, but I was too lonely and afraid nobody else would be interested, so I put up with it.

And then he introduced me to his brother from Seattle. I was 18, and Mike--the brother--was 27. He claimed to be a filmmaker and made his life seem really glamorous. He visited for a week and flew back to Seattle, and we ended up emailing, then phone calls, then endless marathon phone calls, and before I knew it I dropped out of school and moved out here.

I lived with him for 3 years. He was emotionally abusive, insecure, and belittled me every chance he could get. He alienated me from my family, made sure I had no friends outside his social circle, and basically treated me like a child. He was insanely jealous and needed constant reassurance. So, of course, when I flew back to Ohio to visit family, I cheated on him with his brother. That went on for months. I felt so trapped. He broke into my email and found out about it, and we went through nearly a year trying to fix it. He made me jump through the craziest hoops--he burned my clothes and basically everything I had that was related to life in Ohio, and we got in several fights that were so bad he nearly hit me.

And then I got a new job, met some people my age, and they saw how crazy my life was. I finally had people to help snap me out of it. A friend offered to let me stay with her, and even to stand by my side while I packed my stuff and got out. My mom sent me some cash to get my own place. I feel like my real life started at that moment. I've spent the last 7 years trying to learn how to be a real person, and I feel like I've come really far.

I'm not sure how this turned into telling my life story, lol. That's a very abbreviated version, but yeah...I've changed a LOT. I'm actually really glad I went through all that insane drama. I'm definitely stronger, more confident, and sure as s*it know what I want and what I will and will not tolerate from people in my life. And I'm more understanding of those who have made mistakes, even really big ones, because I've done it.

Um, thanks for reading my novella?

[lunarmagic]

Originally Posted by edgeofelise

Betsy, I don't think it's weird that you guys are friends again at all! I find it strange that people can carry grudges about things like that for so long, after the offending person has grown and changed and apologized. People do stupid, stupid sh*t when they're young!

Yes, exactly!!

I don't think I'm the same person at all. I mean, the deep down me is the same, but... I was very quiet, very antisocial, very socially awkward. I didn't go out at all. I had a few friends, but I got left out of most of their stuff (because I just didn't do camping and hanging out and such - I also didn't do phones). In high school I spent most of my time reading books, doing my homework, and avoiding people.

I was on the internet a lot though.... and interestingly I think that's mainly what helped me learn how to be a social person, how to get along with others, how to relate to others. It helped tremendously! And then I met my now-husband and he really dragged me out of my shell as well.... he had friends and we would hang out with people and eat out and stuff.

Also when I met my husband (when I was in college) I went on anti-depressants. That was a HUGE step for me.

So now... I'm actually a really social person (but I still am a homebody to a large degree). I'm much much more socially confident and outgoing and confident. I don't care nearly as much about what people think of me, and I don't get frozen with anxiety about everything. People who just know me now can't believe that I was really meek and terrified and basically never spoke.

[BeckyM]

I'm definitely more outgoing now and socialize more, but other then that, I don't think I've changed that much. I didn't keep up with many people from high school, but honestly didn't care to. I had more teachers who were my friends, then fellow students. With my father sick from as long as I could really remember (I was in the 6th grade, the first time he almost passed away), and my mother has always been frail too I always seemed to be taking care of family. I helped when my grandfather was sick as well. So all of that, plus working to raise money for the family, took away any free time I would have had. So I didn't hang out, cruise around, I think I went to 1 HS football game, I did go to my proms, but that was about it for socialization. I'm not complaining, it's just how it was. And now, 20 years later, I don't feel I've changed that much. I still don't have much interest in interacting with some I went to school with. They still act like they did 20 years ago. Now that I'm a grownup, I do socialize more (not that it's easy finding time these days), and I feel I'm more outgoing and confident of myself. But no biggie changes.

[Brookem]

Longest story EVER summed up:

High school boyfriend cheated on me, major blow out.

Got back in touch when I was 21 - whats done is done so lets be hang out buddies (an NEVER date again!)

First time we hung out in five years after the break up I met his frind, Sam.

Who I MARRIED!

High school boyfriend cheated on me, major blow out, was in my wedding as a groomsmen eight years later.

On a basic level we agree to disagree on many, many many things but we both love my DH so we will be in eachothers lives forever. I cannot be clear enough though... Scott and Brooke do not each other. He is still a cheater and I have seen some good ones get hurt by him. He is a good buddy to my husband though and he is respectful of our family dynamic.

[survey77777]

Interesting stories.
I've definitely changed a lot too. For one I was thin back then. I was also crazy shy and now I can pick up the phone and order my own pizza. I've had lots of crazy life experiences since then that have had huge impact on me and have led me to have a greater appreciation for the lives of those I love than I could ever imagine. My story would be about 7 pages long on here if I started going. I'll just leave it at yes, I have seriously changed.

[momoftwins]

Ok, I'm totally fascinated by all of these! We got kinda deep here!

I LOVE to hear how much more confident we all are. That's awesome. That's the part I love about getting older!

Who else??