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Hi all! I have an almost 3 1/2 year old (40 months old) and a 20 month old. My 3.5 year old, Leila, is SUPER reluctant with PTing. Like she won't even SIT on the toilet with clothes on a lot of the time. She will go through a spurt or two where she will take off pants and diaper and sit on her own volition. Obviously, we encourage that and cheer it on. However, I am getting to the point where I am getting frustrated! My 20 month old shows more of the readiness signs than the 40 month old!!
Some things to mention:
-Leila had a grade 2 kidney reflux meaning that urine was backing up into her ureter and into the kidney causing UTIs. In order to diagnose this she had an invasive procedure involving her having to lay still on the table, be cathed and her bladder filled with dye so that pics could be taken of the reflux. It has since resolved, thank goodness!
-The ONE time she peed on the potty she was shaking so hard and crying by the time she went. I am not sure if I pushed too hard because she wanted a diaper and I refused to put one on her. She will hold the pee in until she has diaper on. I just thought at the time that if she did it she would GET it. Obviously, in retrospect I probably caused her to be even more reluctant.
-We live with my BF's mom. She is extremely prudish and does not like nudity lol. Naked training in her house isn't really possible.
I honestly think my little guy, Owen, will train whenever I dedicate the time to do it. He shows a lot of the signs and LOVES the toilet lol. I am planning on plunging into it full force once it is warm enough that we aren't wearing pants and jackets all the time and can wear loose cotton pants. Also I am a full time student currently but I graduate in May. I will have more time for consistency with that wrapping up. I just really want Leila to be potty trained for preschool this fall and to cut back on the HUGE expense of diapering two. Does anyone have any advice for me concerning Leila? Well really for both of them??
I know it's hard, but I found the best thing was just to be nonchalant about it, and ask from time to time, but if they said no, just leave them be. While my older two were easier to train and were done by 3 years, my youngest was more stubborn, and at 3 1/2 was still using diapers/pullups all the time.
But I kept trying in a non-pushy way, asking from time to time if he needed to go, and finally at 4 he was fully trained (even at nighttime, which didn't happen with his older siblings!), and hasn't had an accident since. I just kept using pullups until he was trained.
My husband also recounts a story from when he and his brother were training. His brother, a year older than him, was stubborn and didn't want to train. So his mother just worked on him. The second he was trained, his brother decided it was for him, too, and was fully trained at the same time.
So maybe it'll just taking seeing her younger brother do it to give her the incentive.