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I have a highly verbal, very active 3.5 year old. When he was 9 months old he started saying 'stinky' and grabbing his diaper when it was full. At around 18 months we started introducing the potty, ocassionally put him on it and told him what it was for. But with us moving and having a LO on the way (she was born 3 weeks before he turned 2) we didn't push it b/c we'd hear how major life changes can make PT difficult. At 2.5 (last Feb, actually) we threw away daytime diapers and put him exclusively in underwear. It has been a MESSY year!! He is definitelly having less accidents than when we started, but I still consider him far from being potty trained. From day 1 he has had no problems using the potty, there was no fear or struggle to get him to go. And I know that physically he CAN hold it, at least for awhile. But he just refuses to stop whatever he's doing to go. If I or another adult is around he will let us take him if we think he has to go. But if he is playing by himself he will just hold it until he has an accident. Easily, we are still having to deal with 3 or 4 accidents a week. I've been tracking for 3 months now and he averages 4 days in a row without accidents. Last week we actually had six days in a row!!! But now he's had accidents the last 5 days. We've tried rewards: candy, stickers, toys, etc. We did a dry erase board where he got a star for a perfect day and lost a star if he had an accident. The goal was 7 stars... he lost interest before we ever got there. He seems to be genuinely sorry when he does have an accident. Per our pediatrician's recommendation we've even started making him clean out his underwear... He tends to have poop accidents, pee is pretty rare. I just don't get why we're still struggling with this!
I'm looking for a few things. First, any suggestions??? Second, does anyone know if there is a hereditary link. I've read that it's pretty common that if a kid is a bedwetter one of the parents probably was, too. Well, here's my embarrassing story. I can remember being constipated constantly as a child and I remember being school age - we're talking 8 or 9 y/o - and pooping in my pants b/c, like my son, I wouldn't stop playing to go use the bathroom. I asked my mom if this was something that started 'later'... like, was I potty trained and then as I got older did I start doing this or was I never 'fully' potty trained until I was an adolescent. Well, she has 5 kids and told me she honestly didn't remember me even pooping my pants. Trust me, I know it happened. I'm so scared that Dominic is going to be pooping his pants until he's 9!! Last, has anyone ever heard of any illness or neurological problem or anything that could be causing this? Like I said, he is so highly verbal, he can definitely tell me when he has to go and when he doesn't. And physically he can hold it. But what if there's something wrong with his brain signals that he's not getting the message until it's too late?
I know this is a bit long, but I am at my wit's end. I'm grasping at straws, trying to find something - anything - that makes sense. Thanks!!!