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I'm 40, I wanted to wait until I was married and had the finances to have a kid. I met the right guy. I could have loved life with or without a child. I take what God gives me. Before I met my husband I was lower/middle class and could only pay for my own way. He makes 3 times my salary and has had his job a few years. Now, I am 5 months pregnant and he may lose his job due to restructuring. We live in Florida and own a home making it impossible to relocate and sell without letting the home foreclose. He has been in a horrible mood every day.
The initial plan was dreamy. Leave full time work and stay home. I have no family to help me with childcare so it made financial sense too. Now it may be work all the time, be a new mom and try and support 3 people on my income. Amazingly I do not qualify for government aid desipte a pitiful salary.
I know I am not the only one with financial uncertainties during pregnancy. I feel bad too because I suddenly resent being pregnant when I was so excited before. And my marraige feels like a cage.
I know my husband loves me. Deep down inside I know he is upset because he feels he's dissapointed me and feels responsible for his family. But part of me is so angry he is wrapped in bad moods unable to be sensitive sometimes. He seems self absorbed in his own world to know how upset I might be about the news. I just wish I knew what the future holds as well but know loving each other is a plus in all this. I put all my negative feelings about it on the table last night because I got tired of the "elephant in the room".
My advice would be for him to start looking for something new NOW. Have him do a resume and start searching jobs. I know the economy is tough right now but if he starts applying now rather than waiting until he loses his job, he has a better shot at finding something.
As for the house, I work at a bank, if you find yourself falling behind call your mortgage company, there are several programs out there to help homeowner's avoid foreclosure.
Do you work?
Also, the main thing right now is save, save, save ... every little bit you can. Instead of getting a coffee on the way to work, make coffee at home and put it in a thermos. Instead of buying lunch, pack it at home.