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Okay so I have had a lot going on lately, and I am concerned for the babies health. My husband is going through a pretty prolonged custody and financial battle with his ex wife. Its like we seem to have movement that this whole thing will end soon, then she does something like NOT show up for court and I am standing there paying a lawyer thousands at the end of the day. But the judge put that to end so now I don't have to worry about going to court and she not show, next time the judge made it clear she would get arrested and all this would be over. So anyway that done, there is a whole new stress wave... we have custody of the kids, and we have to get them into therapy ASAP, well who is going to be doing all that.. ME. And I wouldn't mind, if the ex wife who was never involved in her kids life had to come as well. Then hopefully after a therapist says she is deemed unfit and can't see her kids, which she never has anyway, so I don't know why that would make a difference. But we have to do it. And for anyone that has been through this it is stressful. VERY. So because of all this, I have learned not to sweat the small things anymore, like bills, weather or not the house is clean from top to bottom, so on and so fourth, you really learn whats important at the end of the day, and thats your family, and if you have to go through hell to get it then so be it. And I am just trying to not let the small everyday things bother me, which is a challenge but it has to be set aside. And there is just something deep down that bothers me about a mother not wanting anything to do with her kids. I mean their are crack heads that would crawl to a court house if it meant any chance they ever got to see their kids. And I loose sleep over that thought
So I guess what I am trying to get at is should I just tell my husband I need to step back for a bit, and that I need a break and be shielded from all this for bit, which then only adds stress to him, cause thats time off work to deal with this mess. And I feel bad cause its like one of us has to go to work to pay for all this... And hes sole bread winner so its just easier for me to do it. And the last thing I need at this point is financial stress. So I stuck between a rock and hard place. I want to be there, but then I don't want to harm the baby and I feel like my health and the babies health is the most important thing right now and that should be my focus and I try to make it that way.. but I find myself sorting through this mess more than I sort through what this baby is up to. I loose sleep over this, and I can't eat sometimes, then I get psychically sick, I just don't feel that me dealing with this is good for my health at all. But I don't want to let anyone down here or make their life harder cause I am being selfish, but I think its just to much on me. I mean I found myself getting so upset in court I was storming off and yelling at his lawyer, and I never make issues like that, but its like I have just had enough, and I am so tired of it all.
This obviously isn't the healthiest thing, but do I have any choices here.. Is there anything you guys do to relax? I am open to anything and any advice