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Hi! I am Tracy from Michigan. Honestly, I cannot believe that I belong in this category of "done having children" and am having a hard time accepting it, which is why I went looking for a group in the first place.
I have 4 wonderful children, 2 girls and 2 boys. We just had our youngest on 11/29/10. He will be 7 weeks old tomorrow and time is going way too quickly.
Our oldest daughter, Isabella will be 6 on 1/29
Our oldest son, Avery will be 5 on 2/5
Our youngest daughter, Elise, will be 3 on 2/29
and our Youngest son, Kellan was born on 11/29.
hello welcome to the board. have you already made the decision? if you are feeling unsure maybe you shouldn't go through with it quite yet. Things will get easier for you
Nothing permanent has been done, but Dh is planning to get a vasectomy sometime yet this winter. He is sure he is done. I don't know if it is that I want another baby, or more that I don't want this stage of my life to be over. KWIM? ...or that I am still postpartum and hormonal? Lol
Originally Posted by 4wildflowers
Welcome! Congrats on your newest addition! I have 2 girls and 2 boys, too.
sometimes I think that I would love to have another one... even though I know I can't. But then I think of my future and that when my youngest turns 18 I will be 41. and I am not financially set for a 4th child or have the capacity in my house for another. best of luck!
I completely understand how you feel. I think a big part of my difficulty with being done is also because of not wanting to give up this stage of my life and refusing to admit I'm getting older. At this point we have enough bedrooms for each of our kids to have their own. It's already expensive enough having three kids, a fourth would be really hard on us. My patience already feels stretched paper thin at times, so I dont' know how I think I can handle a fourth. But something inside me is still struggling with being done. My DH, on the other hand, knew 110% that he was done.
For me, it's already done because my Dh had a vasectomy about a month and a half ago. We wouldn't have rushed it so much, but our insurance is really bad and we had already met our deductible this year so it just made sense to get it done when it would cost us a lot less. He didn't pressure me into agreeing with him, I did it on my own, but it was still really hard. I cried the entire day it was done and was so afraid I'd never get over it and end up resenting him. Luckily, I'm feeling better know. I think I've come to terms with it and I'm just enjoying my family the way it is.
Having been where you are I know that no matter how many people tell you their opinion, you're just going to feel ready until you decide for yourself. I kept hearing everyone say "they just knew" when their family was complete and I just didn't feel that way. But the logical part of me knew it was the best decision for us. Good luck and I hope you are able to reach a decision together that you are both happy with.