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Can't agree on if we are done


Forum: Done Having Children

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  #1  
August 15th, 2012, 08:18 AM
TerriLF's Avatar Super Mommy
Join Date: Aug 2012
Posts: 566
My husband and I have 2 kids (3 yr old boy 1.5 yr old girl) and I still want one more. I have always wanted 3 kids and still feel like our family isn't complete. My husband says he doesn't want any more. I tried to push the subject the other day and told him if he is so set against having another child he needs to get a vasectomy. He said no. Whenever the subject gets brought up (by friends and family asking if we are done) he always says he is done and everyone knows I want one more. Well I told him we really needed to sit down and talk because even though I want to wait another year or so, we need to resolve this difference between us because its all I can think about and things like this cause big problems in a marriage. He said it isn't going to be a big problem he just isn't sure he wants another child ( I still see that is a big problem if neither of us wants to move on our view). I don't know what to do...I need all the help advice support I can get from you all..Have any of you had similar situations and what ended up happening.

I feel like since he isn't willing to get a vasectomy, that maybe deep down he does want another child, but that he isn't ready now especially since ours are very needy and fight all the time now..lol..
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  #3  
August 21st, 2012, 12:59 PM
mom2brittnchris's Avatar TTC#3
Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: Eastern North Carolina
Posts: 234
Me and DH went thru this too. I wanted to try for another when our youngest was 1 (we had a 3 year old also) but DH wasn't having it. He was pretty sure he didn't want anymore. I eventually decided I didn't want any either but here we are 11 years later TTC. My husband wants another one so bad!!!! I think that he needed a break from having two so young and close together and now that they are bigger he really does miss having a little one in the hse

With your husband not wanting to have a vasectomy he could not be completely sure that he doesn't want another one but maybe doesn't want to have another one right now. I would give it time and maybe discuss readdressing the thought of having another kid a year or so down the road and see where you both stand then.

Good luck!
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  #5  
December 9th, 2013, 06:28 PM
acupofjoe's Avatar Proud mama of three!
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: washington state.
Posts: 21,341
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Going through this to only its my DH that wants more kids but I am done. It is hard! Best of luck to you guys.
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Nessa proud married working mother of three kids in Washington state. Trying to raise our family of five as LDS. Taking life one day at a time.
Jordan - 6 yr; Stan - 4 yr; & Tyler - 2 yr.
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  #6  
January 16th, 2014, 12:43 PM
ProudMommy2014's Avatar Regular
Join Date: Jan 2014
Location: Canada
Posts: 85
I want another child but my DH does not. We always agreed on 3, although I wanted 4, but I thought we would have three.... nope, only have two and I cant get my DH to budge on this. He is done and does not want a third. SO I am having to accept it I guess.
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  #7  
April 15th, 2014, 12:41 PM
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Posts: 17
My hubby wants another and I do not. He doesn't push the issue though. With both of us working its simply too much for me to handle a 3rd in addition to our 2 we have now. Communicating why you want more and him communicating why he doesn't should definitely happen sooner rather than later.
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  #8  
April 19th, 2014, 01:19 PM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Nov 2008
Posts: 1,786
DH talked about only having two, now we have four. I think just let the topic drop for no especially if you're not ready just yet. His mind may change or your mind may change.
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  #9  
October 3rd, 2014, 09:32 AM
Newbie
Join Date: Apr 2014
Posts: 6
I am glad that both of us agreed that we are already done. Cause even if he still wants more, he can't do anything to convince me.
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