[MrsOrganization2011]

Hi Everyone ... My name is Sarah Ann and I am currently 32, my DH (Colin) is 28.

My story starts long long long before my DH and I ever met. When I started getting AF in grade 7 (age 13) it was not very regular and WOW oh WOW did I ever have horrible cramps. I thought it was normal though so as much as I complained about the pain/cramping I never thought that I needed doctors intervention.

Fast forward 4 years and I am getting ready to head to college. I don't want to suffer with cramps and irregular periods. It was hard enough living at home and not knowing when my period was going to come, but I couldn't do that while I was away from home for the first time. I went to the doctors and asked for Birth Control ... he asked me why I wanted to be on them and I gave him my list:

• Irregular Periods
• Painful Periods
• and to be protected from Pregnancy

His original response to me was "well your irregular and painful periods will stop when you get pregnant"

I was dumb founded, I was 17 and he was basically saying oh its nothing to worry about just go get pregnant. I said well doctor that isn't an option for me, he just chuckled and put me on TriCyclin 21. I stayed on it faithfully till January 2008. I missed a week or so due to forgetting to pick up my next package so I stopped taking them for a few months and sadly I didn't even see a sign of AF. I also noticed I was gaining weight uncontrollably. Some other things I noticed were skin tags all around my neck, hair on my chin, toes and fingers. I also started to see some darkening skin under my boobs, my knees, elbows and around my neck.

So I went to the doctors, and sadly, although it was a different one than when I was 17 he was even more useless. He wouldn't even do any type of bloodwork, he said it was "all in my head" and because I'm overweight I should just diet and all will be fine.

I have dieted since I was in grad 6 (12 years old) and sadly just kept gaining weight. I finally got up the courage to get a second opinion and low and behold after Blood work & Ultrasounds .... I HAVE PCOS.

Now here is the thing, I was told I have PCOS, however, the ONLY course of action that was ever offered to me was Birth Control since I wasn't trying to get pregnant at the time. I was put on Yasmin and while on it I lost weight, close to 45 lbs. I was ecstatic!

On June 30th, 2009 I got engaged and my DH and I planned on getting married on Oct 9, 2011 ... So off to the doctor I went again.

I wanted to know what I should be doing because we were sure we wanted to have a baby as early in our marriage as possible. I was 31 when we got married and he was 27. The doctor said to just start off by dropping the birth control pills and see what happens about 6 months before the wedding night.

So in March of 2009 I stopped my Birth Control and I waited ... and waited ... and waited ... I didn't see AF till mid August and I had gained close to 50lbs AGAIN

Low and behold AF stuck around till late November. YES Straight through my wedding night ... We did have 2 or 3 days on our honeymoon where I didn't have any bleeding at all so at least we did get to consummate our marriage but sadly it only happened twice before I finally went back to the dr to find out what the heck was going on with me.

The doctor (knowing I wanted to have a baby) still put me on Birth Control right away just to STOP AF so they could do some tests. Even on BC my periods were really screwy till March 2011 when I finally started to have a normal 28 day cycle. I also had lost 20lbs in 3 months. Once that happened my doctor referred me to an OBGyn that did 2 biopsies. She told me that all the tests came back fine, however, she wanted to keep my on BC because it seemed that being on it allowed me to lose weight.

One thing that has bothered me from the beginning of my diagnosis is that no one has done more than one set of blood tests, I was never given/shown the results. I was never told what they were looking for during the Biopsy nor was I told the results other than they were fine.

I had my most recent appointment with my OBGyn on June 29th and she asked me to stay on BC for just a little longer (till October) in the hopes of losing more weight before we TTC, however, a few things led me to screw up my pills.

I ran out while I was away on vacation and didn't realize it so I ended up missing a full week of my pills so I just "started over" These mess ups also happened to fall when my DH and I seemed to have a huge hormone surge and just wanted to have sex over and over and over again ... low and behold I missed my period. I stopped my pills right away just in case I was pregnant but AF is now 3 weeks late and no BFP's .... I still don't see my OBGyn till Oct 5th.

I realized after reading all the forums/posts that I really don't know enough about my own body and PCOS. I had started a low carb diet in March and have had success on it. I was reading that some people have had success taking Cinnamon Capsules to help with weight loss since some PCOS Patients have Insulin Resistance too. Now I have no idea if I have IR but I figured its a natural remedy why not try. I have also started Temping (even though I seem to be in the middle of a cycle) to learn the ins and outs of it to help me figure out when and even if I ovulate. So here's my journal to vent on how confused I am ... on my trials and tribulations from this day forward ... I hope to get all this figured out soon but I really don't have a whole lot of faith since I'm now 32 and have had symptoms since I was 13

[MrsOrganization2011]

Sometimes a little knowledge can be dangerous ... I keep seeing signs.... Early Pregnancy signs, Ovulation signs, AF Signs ... and yet I am pretty sure none of them actually occurred yet

Do you ever feel like all this knowledge is floating around in your head and even though its supposed to make sense none of it does?!

I know that is how I feel ... almost daily

I am 32, as I mentioned earlier. I have been with my husband for almost 7 years and married for almost 1 of them. We WAITED to have sex, yes I said WAITED. We were adamant that we wanted to be married before we shared this experience. But we never ever thought that getting pregnant would be an issue.

I have known I had PCOS for a few years, but I really didn't know enough about it to worry that it would cause us issues. The doctors all said "lose weight and you will get pregnant right away" No one has ever said "oh you are going to have a difficult time getting pregnant" but since I really know nothing about what my body is doing from day to day even with charting/temping it is frustrating.

In 2010 there were 10 weddings of friends/acquaintances. Of those 10 marriages we are one of only 2 couples to not be pregnant yet.

I know it has been a battle to find out what is actually wrong with me, it has been a battle with my weight (and always will be I'm sure), but there are times I don't think my doctor really understands how much I want a child. Yes she knows but I don't know if she really gets it. And to make matters worse it is months between appointments.

In between the appointments I read and learn more about my PCOS, I read up on ways to lose weight, I pray constantly that God will bless me and DH with a child and that HE will guide me and my doctors in the right direction to help remove some of my doubt/worry/confusion.

On a side note last evening was HORRIBLE for me ... I was so tired I couldn't keep my eyes open from about 6:30pm on, that on top of pain in my lower abdomen & lower back had me in bed at 9pm but sadly now here I sit at 4am wide awake and I still have work from 8am - 4pm today

This morning I am just trying to get things said that have been in my head for a while I guess ... I figure with them out and "on digital paper" at least I can re-read them and maybe get the courage to ask my doctors for more clarification/direction in my TTC journey.

[MrsOrganization2011]

I had a pretty good weekend, however, I seemed to have spent a LOT of it in bed. After work on Friday I was so tired I didn't even want to go get groceries. I went to bed around 10pm and didn't get out of bed till 9am the next morning. I NEVER sleep that long. Sat evening I took a nap at 6 and didn't get up til 8 ... and then Sunday, even after almost 11 hours of sleep I went back for a nap at 12:30 and didn't get up till 4pm. I couldn't seem to even get out of my own way I was that tired.

This morning when I got up and even now as I type I feel nauseous, tired, and have had headaches off an on since Friday.

I would LOVE for it to be pregnancy symptoms, but I have a feeling I'm just coming down with the nasty flu that's going around.

I have started taking prenatal vitamins again. I was told to take them months ago and started but then stopped, then started again and I figured if I really am serious about wanting to get pregnant I need to take some things more seriously like my own health. I also started taking Cinnamon capsules. I had been reading that it is good for PCOS patients that also have IR and even though I have never been told if I am IR or not I figured its natural why not try and see where it takes us.

[MrsOrganization2011]

I am still feeling oddities of the last few weeks, sore boobs (from time to time not all the time), frequent urination, cramps, even had a little bit of an odd colored CM.

I am heading to Walt Disney World in 15 days I really wanted to find out what has been going on so my dr is sending me for bloodwork. I don't believe I'm pregnant because none of my HPTs have come back with BFP's however he said its possible that they are all false positives (which shocked me) he said if I am pregnant its too early to do an ultrasound because of my weight right now but that bloodwork will give us a clear positive or negative. Luckily since I leave in two weeks he's letting me call in for my results.

I'm hoping for a positive but highly doubting I will get it. Bloodwork in an hour, but might be a day before I get the results!

[MrsOrganization2011]

Well I have finally received my blood test results and sadly it was a no, but I'm really not that upset. Everyone though I was going to be pissed off, upset, crying ... but I'm not. I am just glad to have an answer.

I am still blown away that in this day and age our part of the province doesn't have the results online for the doctors to see, instead they have to wait for them to be either sent via a courier or faxed.

Now I just wait for AF to show up!!

I leave for Disney in 13 days so having a negative might actually be an ok thing. It allows me to enjoy all the rides and even lets me have sushi and just relax and stop stressing!

I will now concentrate on weight loss and staying happy & healthy

[Heart_and_Soul]

I just wanted to say hi and hope you are having a fabulous and relaxing time in Disneyland. I am just returning to JM after being on hiatus for a few years as it was too painful to come on here anymore. I am TTC'ing #2 and have been for over 6 years. I understand your struggle and frustration completely. I am just beginning my weightloss journey and have a long way to go. If you'd like a buddy when you get home maybe we can take this journey together. I'm in BC on the westcoast so we have some commonalities as the US medical system can work differently then ours.

I hope you and your DH have a wonderful vacation and you come back feeling renewed.

Blessings to you both and I look forward to getting to know you.

[MrsOrganization2011]

I've been back home for a little over a week now and life is going really well. I was able to stay pretty much the same weight wise while I was on vacation ... I only gained 1lb which was awesome!! I have finally had my doctors appointment with my OBGyn and god love her she listened and explained and understood finally!!!

I have been married almost a year (Married Oct 9th, 2010) I am 32 years old. My husband and I want children really badly. All our friends around us are getting pregnant and here we are unable to ... mainly we were unable to because my OBGyn was keeping me on Birth Control to help control my PCOS symptoms. So when I went to the doctors yesterday I told her flat out I'm done with Birth Control ... I asked for more/better assistance in getting my hormones back in check, and hopefully I can get pregnant.

So yesterday since I haven't had a period since June 29th she prescribed me Provera to bring on my period. I started it last evening and now I wait ...

She also prescribed me Metformin which I start this evening (at supper) I am hoping that this helps with some of my symptoms and gets me back to "normal"


Heart_and_Soul, I would LOVE to take this journey together with you. It is a rough journey and I can't even imagine what you have and are going through but I hope that we can help each other out!!

[MrsOrganization2011]

Well I'm so excited to FINALLY be on CD1 I literally jumped for joy this morning ... I have been waiting, not so patiently I might add, for AF to show up. Now to go out and get some OPK's and see if we can make this cycle count!!!

[aubers68]

Hi!! My names Aubrey and I am also trying to conceive with pcos. I noticed your journal and just wanted to say hello. If you ever have any questions or just need some girls to talk to who are dealing with the same issues you know we're all here for you :-)