[EOD_wife]

Hi, I'm Crystal and I am from the Nov 09 PR. My son is 4.5 months old.
I started noticing that things weren't right at the beginning of Feb when he was 13-14 weeks old. I had never had feelings of harming him, but I wondered if he would be better off being adopted. Now, my husband and I had planned this pregnancy and I have always wanted to be a mom, so I knew something wasn't right in my head. I started feeling so unmotivated for the day and it was so hard to pull myself together let alone take care of my son! I looked forward to when my husband came home from work everyday. I felt like being a mommy was a job that I couldn't handle! We moved here a year ago, so I don't have many friends and no family, so as for getting physical help with my son that was out of the question.
I called my dr and she put me on 50mg of Zoloft and that seems to be helping, however the dose got upped to 100mg and that works way better. I also started seeing a counselor twice a week and attending a support group for PPD along with a mommy and me class.
I am now not experiencing any depression, but am having major anxiety to the point where I had an anxiety attack the other day and my husband had to come home from work to care for the baby bc I couldn't! I had to take 2 xanex and sleep it off it was so bad.
I know a lot of it is hormonal and stress but when I get into those slumps, I swear it feels like a reality, not just a feeling!
I am seeing my dr. again on Monday to talk about a medicine change to help with the anxiety, it's not like I can just go around popping xanex all day I am also going to try and find time to read this book on what exactly anxiety is, I think that will help with the psychological aspect of it!
Plus, what it all boils down to is I want to enjoy my son more!!! I don't want mommyhood to feel like a job; a chore!
Thanks for listening to my story and I look forward to getting to know you ladies!

[JessP]

Welcome to the board. I am so glad that you found us. I am glad that the meds are helping. It could be the zoloft that is causing the anxiety, look online at side effect or ask your doctor. I have had anxiety attacks and they suck. If you can try to start walking or doing something exercise like each day. That will help with the anxiety and stress to keep it from building up that much. My understanding of how it works is basically it all builds up and your body does what it has to, to release all of it. I hope things continue to get better for you. Again welcome to the board. Don't be shy .

[andi2284]

Welcome to the board!

Have you heard of the Feeling Good Handbook? This is the book I've been working with my therapy and it has some good information and helpful exercises to deal with depression and anxiety.