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What are your triggers that cause strong negative feeling?
For me Hope's screaming drives me insane! I can have one in each ear both screaming and her's physically gets right into my bones and drives me insane. I only have DS to compare to but compared to him she screams a lot. I get some comfort from that fact that other people have commented that she goes from 0-100 in a snap. She will be happily playing then SCREAMING when she is hungry or tired.
Her eating is another trigger. She is a snacker and sucks at eating. Every feed is frusterating becuase she doesnt take enough to last more than 3 hours and usually wakes several times over night still
For me my triggers towards my younger daughter are when I am thinking I would like to just play or spend some alone time with my oldest daughter or thinking how life would be different with or without her either for the better or worst.
Another trigger I realized last night was going to the mall then out to dinner with baby food on my pants or some piece of clothing. Then I get to feeling grubby and thinking i don't want to be a mom anymore or should i even be a mom with these thoughts.