[TarrahLovesHuLo]

So I get that every child does things at their own pace, and you can't compare one to the other but.....

I've just been feeling like it's my fault Hunter isn't progressing very fast. I couldn't give a reason, so I know it isn't my fault, but I just hate that he seems so behind. He only just began really pulling up to standing, and staying standing for almost a minute. He began crawling within the past few weeks. He's super fast, and seems like he's been doing it forever, but he just doesn't have the stability most our PR babies do. He definitely doesn't even have the balace to stand unassisted for even a second. It's been somewhat depressing hearing about everyone's progress. Don't get me wrong, I love how awesome your babies are (and cute too ), it's just been difficult as a mother to see my baby behind. I've taken a short break from JM to let myself be his mother, and not to let other's progress change my feelings on how well he is doing. I was beginning to feel like his milestones became a reaction of "finally" instead of a celebratory moment. I didn't FB announce his crawling, out of shame for how long it took, and thats when it hit me just how ignorant I was being.

I love you ladies, and I want to be here, but I have to be here on the right terms. I return to work in less than 2 weeks so I've been trying to really make a go of my time left with my kidlets. JM wasn't blocked at work when I left so I hope I can still pop in during the day on my lunch hour. I'm suspecting after work will be crammed with adjustment and routines for a while.

sorry to be so long winded. I just wanted to share my feelings, where I've been, and why I am not here as often. I still lurk too. You can't get rid of me!! LOL. I am going to try not to let my stupid emotions keep me away. I came to our group for all your knowlege and support, so I guess shying away would be a dumb thing to do when I need to cash in! lol

[starrsgirl]

We love to hear about Hunter!!!! And whenever you post something/anything about him, we will cheer so hard over here because it's really special! I am so excited when another baby does anything, whether they are the first in the PR or the last, I love hearing about their individual achievements! It IS a big deal for him and for you so put it out there and let us celebrate with you, whatever it is.

And let's be honest here, Hunter is the best ball player in the PR! (from your video).

Hey slow down.....if you are feeling left behind Caleb and I can join you and keep you company. Caleb pulled up for the first time last week and hasn't done it since. He pulls up to his knees but that's it. Caleb only has 2 teeth, only says "ma ma" and "da da". He still army crawls instead of the proper on all hands and knees crawl.

They'll do it all eventually.

In the mean time we should form our own club....LOL

[Vincent'sMommy]

I had been feeling that exact same way too for a while and I still do sometimes. I've always had issues with social comparison and letting it affect me too much and now that I have a son it is so hard not to compare him to other babies and I also feel responsible for his delays sometimes, even though I know I shouldn't. He finally made a little progress with gross motor skills but I'm still worried about his lack of communication. He doesn't say any words, follow any commands, use any gestures at all (no pointing or waving or anything) and I don't know if he understands anything we're saying.

I'm feeling a little better since we've arranged to have some come do an early intervention evaluation next week and see if he is eligible for services. If he is, which I suspect he will be at least in the area of communication, then I feel better knowing he will get some extra help and it will maybe help me learn ways that I can help too. And if he isn't eligible for services then that means he's not really delayed and that would also be good.

It is hard to get on here and Facebook some times and see how well other babies are doing. I know what you mean about feeling proud of the other babies and happy for the mamas but it still makes you kind of sad or worried. I feel the same way all the time so you're definitely not alone.

[AndiNW]

Originally Posted by TarrahLovesHuLo

So I get that every child does things at their own pace, and you can't compare one to the other but.....

I've just been feeling like it's my fault Hunter isn't progressing very fast. I couldn't give a reason, so I know it isn't my fault, but I just hate that he seems so behind. He only just began really pulling up to standing, and staying standing for almost a minute. He began crawling within the past few weeks. He's super fast, and seems like he's been doing it forever, but he just doesn't have the stability most our PR babies do. He definitely doesn't even have the balace to stand unassisted for even a second. It's been somewhat depressing hearing about everyone's progress. Don't get me wrong, I love how awesome your babies are (and cute too ), it's just been difficult as a mother to see my baby behind. I've taken a short break from JM to let myself be his mother, and not to let other's progress change my feelings on how well he is doing. I was beginning to feel like his milestones became a reaction of "finally" instead of a celebratory moment. I didn't FB announce his crawling, out of shame for how long it took, and thats when it hit me just how ignorant I was being.

I love you ladies, and I want to be here, but I have to be here on the right terms. I return to work in less than 2 weeks so I've been trying to really make a go of my time left with my kidlets. JM wasn't blocked at work when I left so I hope I can still pop in during the day on my lunch hour. I'm suspecting after work will be crammed with adjustment and routines for a while.

sorry to be so long winded. I just wanted to share my feelings, where I've been, and why I am not here as often. I still lurk too. You can't get rid of me!! LOL. I am going to try not to let my stupid emotions keep me away. I came to our group for all your knowlege and support, so I guess shying away would be a dumb thing to do when I need to cash in! lol

How is he doing verbally? Wyatt is a maniac all over the place (But still not walking), but doesn't say that much. Sometimes they focus on one area or the other.

Although I've always denied this, maybe boys do things more slowly than girls. Since a few of us had girls the first time around, maybe our expectations are a little skewed? Also remember that this is a pretty small group, so the sample size that we are comparing our LO's to is small which is not very accurate.

I hear you on the "it's my fault" thing. Wyatt cries most of the day it seems and of course I assume it's my fault. He used to be so happy, now he's just miserable. I can't for the life of me figure out what is causing it.

[shockandawe]

I'm sorry you haven't been feeling comfortable. I think you mamas are doing great, and shouldn't be worried about what other kids are doing so much.

Do you know something - I'm half ashamed to admit it, but after I saw your video with Hunter rolling the ball back and forth, I ran out to buy a ball for Maggie because I felt soooo bad that we had never done that before. It's such a simple thing, but I'd never even thought of it, and I felt terrible. She still won't roll the ball back and forth. And she's now over a year old, and just pulling herself up to a standing position. She hasn't got any interest in cruising along the furniture. Just standing once in a while before she whines and wants to climb up into your lap. You're all good mommies.

Tarah, have you spoken to your pedi about your concerns? What have they said?

Sorry you feel the way you do but I want you to know it is normal to worry when you compare.

I know this doesnt make you feel better but I sometimes lurk on Jan/feb 07 board but I have never posted, and honestly I have even looked for a while because I read what they all write and think "wow, Kaitlyn cant do HALF the thing those kid can". Everytime I read I feel like I am a failure as a mom because she doesnt know how to tie her shoes, ride her bike w/ out training, write her full name, she doesnt know he address. I just think to myself "My gosh, she is only 4! "

Anyways there really is a wide development with kids. There are things hunter can do that others cant, and things others can do but he cant. Try not to compare though. Even though this it the July PR we have babies born in early June, AND early August so that is a BIG range of ages and they learn so much just over night. Im serious too. One day they cant do something and the next they can.

[Hollybear]

Originally Posted by KaiX2Momma

Sorry you feel the way you do but I want you to know it is normal to worry when you compare.

I know this doesnt make you feel better but I sometimes lurk on Jan/feb 07 board but I have never posted, and honestly I have even looked for a while because I read what they all write and think "wow, Kaitlyn cant do HALF the thing those kid can". Everytime I read I feel like I am a failure as a mom because she doesnt know how to tie her shoes, ride her bike w/ out training, write her full name, she doesnt know he address. I just think to myself "My gosh, she is only 4! "

Anyways there really is a wide development with kids. There are things hunter can do that others cant, and things others can do but he cant. Try not to compare though. Even though this it the July PR we have babies born in early June, AND early August so that is a BIG range of ages and they learn so much just over night. Im serious too. One day they cant do something and the next they can.

That is so so so true.

[Daffodil]

That's exactly how I felt...but once Arielle learned out to sit-up, its like everything happened at once. Although compared to other babies her age, she still seems "behind", for me, seeing where she was and where she is now is like night and day.

Yay for Hunter pulling up and speed crawling!! I think he's right where he should be. Did every baby in this playgroup crawl at some point? I kept thinking some of them might skip crawling altogether but it seems like they all crawled (or their version of crawling). Anyway, I'm sure he'll do things quickly now (or quickly for him)... I'm glad you are back, I was wondering how you were doing.

Originally Posted by Vincent'sMommy

I had been feeling that exact same way too for a while and I still do sometimes. I've always had issues with social comparison and letting it affect me too much and now that I have a son it is so hard not to compare him to other babies and I also feel responsible for his delays sometimes, even though I know I shouldn't. He finally made a little progress with gross motor skills but I'm still worried about his lack of communication. He doesn't say any words, follow any commands, use any gestures at all (no pointing or waving or anything) and I don't know if he understands anything we're saying.

I'm feeling a little better since we've arranged to have some come do an early intervention evaluation next week and see if he is eligible for services. If he is, which I suspect he will be at least in the area of communication, then I feel better knowing he will get some extra help and it will maybe help me learn ways that I can help too. And if he isn't eligible for services then that means he's not really delayed and that would also be good.

.

Michele, does Vincent turn to you when you call his name? His hearing is ok, right?

[Vincent'sMommy]

Originally Posted by Daffodil

That's exactly how I felt...but once Arielle learned out to sit-up, its like everything happened at once. Although compared to other babies her age, she still seems "behind", for me, seeing where she was and where she is now is like night and day.

Yay for Hunter pulling up and speed crawling!! I think he's right where he should be. Did every baby in this playgroup crawl at some point? I kept thinking some of them might skip crawling altogether but it seems like they all crawled (or their version of crawling). Anyway, I'm sure he'll do things quickly now (or quickly for him)... I'm glad you are back, I was wondering how you were doing.



Michele, does Vincent turn to you when you call his name? His hearing is ok, right?

He doesn't always turn when I call his name but I think it's mainly because he's too distracted or engrossed in whatever he's doing or looking at. I think he has pretty good hearing because I've noticed him reacting to even fairly quiet noises before.

[Daffodil]

Originally Posted by Vincent'sMommy

He doesn't always turn when I call his name but I think it's mainly because he's too distracted or engrossed in whatever he's doing or looking at. I think he has pretty good hearing because I've noticed him reacting to even fairly quiet noises before.

Oh yeah, Arie does this too. I usually have to repeat her name quite a bit before she turns to me! But yeah, glad his hearing is ok! How is his crawling going? Arie is still doing her awkward lopsided crawl, I'm going to talk to her pediatrician about it at her 1 year appointment, I read if they are lopsided for more than a month after they start crawling, there *may* be a problem. I don't think there is, but couldn't hurt to mention it.

Let us know how Vincent's evaluation goes! I hope it goes well, but like you said, if it doesn't, then at least he'll get the extra therapy.

[TarrahLovesHuLo]

It's very comforting to know I'm not alone. I just hope you ladies with the amazingly smart and advanced babies don't think I'm taking away from your joy b/c I certainly celebrate along with you and your LOs!

@ Andi, he mumbles thinking he's conversing with me, but really no words outside of mama, dada, and fakies like gaga. lol

He does roll pass a ball, his version of bouncing, pointing, clapping, hi 5s, and he's up on all fours for crawling (super fast). he's still pulling himself up on the toy bin our couch and using his face as and extra grip!! lol He also signs for hungry, please, more, and all done. Its pretty subtle, but he does it.

I did have an appointment booked with the doctor but he began crawling within a few days after so I cancelled it. Now I'm just waiting on his crusing furniture so he can gain balance and move onto standing unassisted. I think I'm just upset I'll probably miss being the one to witness those milestones while I'm at work whereas my daughter did it all before I returned.

Thank you for all your kind words ladies, it really does give me a nice little ego boots, that pathetically enough, I needed.

[shockandawe]

You should be sooo proud of him! He sounds like he's doing fabulously! I totally understand that worry of missing the big stuff. But remember that no matter when you see him do them, they'll always be the first time you saw him do it...and that's the most important part. You're not going to stop playing and teaching him things after you get home from work or before you leave. He's gonna do great. I just know it.

[Vincent'sMommy]

Originally Posted by TarrahLovesHuLo

It's very comforting to know I'm not alone. I just hope you ladies with the amazingly smart and advanced babies don't think I'm taking away from your joy b/c I certainly celebrate along with you and your LOs!

@ Andi, he mumbles thinking he's conversing with me, but really no words outside of mama, dada, and fakies like gaga. lol

He does roll pass a ball, his version of bouncing, pointing, clapping, hi 5s, and he's up on all fours for crawling (super fast). he's still pulling himself up on the toy bin our couch and using his face as and extra grip!! lol

I did have an appointment booked with the doctor but he began crawling within a few days after so I cancelled it. Now I'm just waiting on his crusing furniture so he can gain balance and move onto standing unassisted. I think I'm just upset I'll probably miss being the one to witness those milestones while I'm at work whereas my daughter did it all before I returned.

Thank you for all your kind words ladies, it really does give me a nice little ego boots, that pathetically enough, I needed.

It sounds like he's doing great to me! If it makes you feel better, Vincent doesn't really do any of the things you mentioned except pulling up. He's crawling more on all fours and it seems to be pretty evenly but it's still very slow and not very far and only when he really really wants something. He seems like he's maybe within a couple of weeks of walking on his own, though, so I'm trying not to worry about the motor skills so much.

[sfarrow3]

Tarrah don't worry be happy!! hahaha on a serious tip though like everyone said we all love to hear about every babies accomplishments and every baby is different. London is one of the oldest baby in here (June 24) and there are things that she is not doing that the babies born in middle or late July is. I know London and her thing is that she is so scared of taking risks. Keep your head up!

Originally Posted by KaiX2Momma

Sorry you feel the way you do but I want you to know it is normal to worry when you compare.

I know this doesnt make you feel better but I sometimes lurk on Jan/feb 07 board but I have never posted, and honestly I have even looked for a while because I read what they all write and think "wow, Kaitlyn cant do HALF the thing those kid can". Everytime I read I feel like I am a failure as a mom because she doesnt know how to tie her shoes, ride her bike w/ out training, write her full name, she doesnt know he address. I just think to myself "My gosh, she is only 4! "
Anyways there really is a wide development with kids. There are things hunter can do that others cant, and things others can do but he cant. Try not to compare though. Even though this it the July PR we have babies born in early June, AND early August so that is a BIG range of ages and they learn so much just over night. Im serious too. One day they cant do something and the next they can.

REally?? Caden is 4 he can't tie his shoes, ride a bike w/o training and he sure as h-e-l-l doesn't know his address!!! hahaha

Originally Posted by sfarrow3

Tarrah don't worry be happy!! hahaha on a serious tip though like everyone said we all love to hear about every babies accomplishments and every baby is different. London is one of the oldest baby in here (June 24) and there are things that she is not doing that the babies born in middle or late July is. I know London and her thing is that she is so scared of taking risks. Keep your head up!



REally?? Caden is 4 he can't tie his shoes, ride a bike w/o training and he sure as h-e-l-l doesn't know his address!!! hahaha

DONT go to the Jan/Feb 07 PR because it will make you feel bad. All those kids are soooooooo advanced. (Thats the way it seems anyways) I will admit that when I read about kids who are 4 doing things she cant, I try to teach her.

First time Kristen and I had a playdate, CiCi knew how to swing herself and everything. I went home and practiced with Kaitlyn and she learned in 2 days! Same when I read *some* kids at 4 can write their name I started really working with Kaitlyn. She can copy what I write but I have to write it first then she copies it on another paper.

[sfarrow3]

Originally Posted by KaiX2Momma

DONT go to the Jan/Feb 07 PR because it will make you feel bad. All those kids are soooooooo advanced. (Thats the way it seems anyways) I will admit that when I read about kids who are 4 doing things she cant, I try to teach her.

First time Kristen and I had a playdate, CiCi knew how to swing herself and everything. I went home and practiced with Kaitlyn and she learned in 2 days! Same when I read *some* kids at 4 can write their name I started really working with Kaitlyn. She can copy what I write but I have to write it first then she copies it on another paper.

Well Caden can write his name, but you see how many letters he has? LOL