[Venus]

When I was in school/college I was never afraid of anything, by anything I mean being sick or passing out..I was not worried about my health and was concentrating on better things. But after I got married I became careful with eating/drinking/exercising and never wanted anything to happen to me so DH do not get a chance to marry anyone else. This grew on me when I had DS I do not want him to have a step mom and now after having DD I am constantly living under some kind of fear. When I read about symptoms of a disease or someone being sick I feel even more scared. I am not working so I don't have any social circle or anyone to talk to. If I get a common cold or tummy bug or feel dizzy, like I posted in other thread I think very negative. I am not sure what to do? I wonder if its only me thinking like that or is it hormones !!! And what should I do about it? How should I motivate myself, be more fun and stop being so miserable.

Thanks for reading though.

Venus

[amhk]

I have talked to many moms (including myself) who have experienced greater levels of anxiety after having children. Because of that I would guess that it is a common problem. However, I don't think we have to live like this and we can learn to control our thoughts so that anxiety does not overtake us. If we don't learn how to battle those thoughts, we are at risk for anxiety growing into a huge monster that seriously affects our lives. I could write a ton, but to give just a quick suggestion, when you are feeling anxiety inside, try and trace it to the thought behind it. For instance, trace it back to worrying that if you get sick or in accident, you feel worried that something would happen to you and then your children. Then, replace that thought with a positive or neutral thought: The chances of something happening to me so that I would not be around for my children is VERY slim and I do not believe that anything bad is going to happen to me. Instead of focusing on "what if" I am going to focus on loving my family and enjoying every moment with them.
If you feel that you need more help with this, I would recommend speaking with a counselor or therapist- they could really help you work through your anxiety- determining the root cause- and replace negative/anxiety-provoking thoughts with healthier thinking. It takes some work- but you can definitely learn to keep your thoughts in a more positive and healthy place.

[Venus]

Thanks Alisha..I will look for a therapist..I don't know any yet.

[krsnow]

I totally agree with Alisha, replacing the negative thoughts with positive\happy ones is the key. I dealt with a lot of anxiety many years back and I did talk to a counselor that helped tremendously. I had similar issues worrying about getting sick, and hearing other people's stories about being sick made it worse. I totally know where you are coming from. You also have to figure out why it started - for me I was in a bad marriage & felt trapped. If you could find a counselor that would be the best thing. I can also recommend a book that helped me a lot: Amazon.com: Your Best Life Now: 7 Steps to Living at Your Full Potential (9780446532754): Joel Osteen: Books
This book talks a lot about thinking positive, and how your thinking can control the outcome of your future.

Feel free to PM me if you want to talk more.